Hello everyone and happy spring! I am happy to inform you that we have another TOP TEN questions that YOU have sent in to me. It is always a great deal of fun to open your emails and to see the craziness that is in each question. I hope you enjoy my responses.
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1) I would like to know if you have had sex IN a car as a teenager.
No way Jose! My dad would have never ever in a million, billion, kajillion, years EVER have allowed me to go out ALONE on a date with a BOY that drove a car. They have dark thoughts and fast hands those boys. I think I was like on 40 and married with five kinds when I had sex in a car.
2) What the hell is MAN FUR?
It is a kinder way of describing that extremely dense and course forest of body hair that encrusts all parts of the MAN body and traps things like lint, odor, popcorn, and bits of dingle. We soft supple girliee types like to pet manfur.
3) How do you sleep in your own bed, on you tummy or on the edge, just give me details.
Nude, in the middle, and with a slight snore according to hubby
I sleep on my half; unfortunately for hubby my half seems to be in the middle up the bed. Thus his section is a quartile on either side of me. FYI I am also a bum snuggler. I like to get my tummy as close to hubby’s bum as I can –then I get too warm and flop over on to my tummy and fall fast asleep.
4) What would make you leave your husband?
Oh I leave him all the time, I wander off as soon as we get into any BIG BOX store. He spends over half of his shopping experience looking for the Bird.
5) What advise do you have for a guy on how to drive girls crazy with sexual desire.
Ohh this is like a little word puzzle answer:
All you have to do is remember the Sweet-Sixteen.
Sixteen letters that will bring every girl out of her shell and love you for eternity because of your prowess.
S-L-O-W for a L-O-N-G time and then go F-A-S-T and when she wants to stop give her a little M-O-R-E.
6) Do you think bitchy women are sexy?
I would say they equally as sexy as loud drunk assholes that chant at sporting matches.
7) Have you ever kissed your own cousin?
DUDE! I was like -five, it was Christmas, I wiped it off.
That totally means it didn’t count.
We never spoke of it again. and neither should you.
Do you like men who are clean shaven in their Netherlands regions?
I will take my Netherlands au natural but I prefer that gardens to be groomed.
9) I think you should let me come over with my meatstick and show you what a crazy Irish xxxxx would do to that sassy little arse’ of yours.
Is that Meatstick or Matchstick??
Better send in a picture with that offer.
10) Have you ever just sat and watched yourself having sex?
Ok dude I am going to just GIVE your question another question instead of an answer-
Riddle me this Batman: If I am the active participant how can I be my OWN voyeur?
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With spring in the air, Hubby is ready to get snapping and enjoy some time with his favorite Bird.
Have a great week.
Kisses
Bird