plumprlvr's Blog - page 4

Got a terrabyte drive today. Have no idea why but it was a great deal. I keep thinking I have almost filled a 500 gig drive so who knows.

I can't believe it, I have fucking diaper rash. I am 53 years old, I do not pee my pants nor my bed, and its only about 50F here. How the hell do I get DR. Gotta run to the store to buy some Desitin. The tube I have is from when the grandkid lived here and that was three years ago. Went to squeeze some out and it was rock hard.

Yup - just when you think it can't get worse........

...say never again. (because you will)

...think things can't get any worse. (because they can)

...take anything for granted. (because it can all change in a New York minute)

It is groundhogs day here in the United States. I should be happy right? I'm a groundhog right? Yea, you try having a "day" like this. They don't even have sales in my name. At least put a plasma or some womens underwear on sale. But what do they do, the jerk me out a good sleep to forecast the freekin weather. Do I look like that KRON4 weatherwomen who is on at 5am wearing leather. No, I'm just a big assed rodent. So how the hell did I become the standard to judge if winter will last six more weeks. Because I'm a big assed rodent thats why. Freekin squirrels are too damn skinney. The winter lasts because I see my shadow?. Who the hell thought that up, a bunch of drunk Germans I bet. How the hell am I not supposed to see my shadow?! It's freekin dark out and they have 10 gazillion candlepower of lights on my hole. You see my front paws moving, I not trying to get away, I'm trying to find my god damn sun glasses. Plus it's cold out. At least the lights warm it up to about 130F. Then these idiots are in freekin costumes. Yo, what's up with this? They all look like freekin Abe Lincoln. What, no Elvis' up at that hour, duh. I might be in a better mood with an Elvis singing "come and love me, love me my groundhog". Ah hell, lets get the weatherwoman in the leather skirt to jerk me out of the hole. Yea now we're talking about a reason to get up. Only one who had a worse day then me on Groundhogs Day was Bill Murray. Thank god I only have to go thru this once a freekin year. Now if you'll excuse me, I need a latte. Phil

Finally a really good football sandwiched between not so great commercials. Guess I can't call it the Stupid Bowl or HyperBowl until after next year (and I love football!!)

Michael Phelps tokeing - too funny.

Received an e-mail today - subject line read "another dumb blonde joke" ummm errr is there any other kind of blonde joke?

I think Jessica Simpson looks pretty hot right now. You can bet all the guys that are trashing for being "fat" would fuck her in an instant.

My eldery neighbor just got carted off in an ambulance. I hope it's not serious. She is a sweet lady.

I think my doctor is going to tell me lay off the stout. I'm putting this down so Guinness can cut production accordingly and the Irish gov't can plan for the economic downturn this action on my part will cause.

Neighbor on the other side (who doesn't even live there - long story) is at the end of easement - a good 80 meters away. I can hear him yelling in the phone at some woman. "why did you let him do that.. yada yada yada.....bulllshit he xxxxxx you...yada yada yada" He doesn't shut the fuck up it may be time to rearrange his dental work. I try to avoid violence but sometimes you just gotta knock the stupid mother fuckers out!!! (I already think the twit is a jerk, this conversation is not changing that image of him)

I would add a picture of my adult wading pool but me thinks NN doesn't like pics of nude pools. hehe. Yea Kelly I know why they pulled yours - I don't agree with it but it's their sandbox.

It's offical - my sewer is backed up. It just went burp burp and toilet paper is in the yard. Good thing is it pops the clean out lid so it runs into a spot in the yard and not back up into the sinks and tub. Shhhhh don't tell CA EPA.

Maybe I need to go to ACE Hardware 1. To see if they let me in the door 2. See if my new favorite vest wearer is there 3. See if she learned anything yesterday.

I need to get a pedicure as there is no way in hell I'll lose a bet.

Bad thing is I'll be in Charlotte NC, lets see, an older balding guy from SF getting a pedicure in Charlotte. Nope, no reason to tempt fate that much. It will wait.

When looking at flight status' why do they give you the option of yesterdays flights? If the plane ain't in from yesterday, it was delayed or went down. Either way you would have heard about it.

Stepdaughter sent an e-mail making it sound her daughter is in her custody. WTF. I think the bitch is lying thru her teeth. That can be verified with a phone call.

Yup boring Sunday. Can't even lay out nude since I have no lounge chair. Only thing I found was the resin chaise' they have on cruise ships. I'm being too cheap to spend $80.00 for one.

I went to ACE Hardware today to get a particular tool. I had this tool at one time but clearly someone kipped off with it. Someone who was likely sleeping with oldest SD. But I was working on Great White today and needed this tool.
I was met at ACE by the annoying greeter with some other person in a red vest. They asked if I needed help -nope I know what I need. But I wandered to the far side of the store - where things like cleaning supplies are kept. The woman in the vest followed me. I went into the area where hoses are kept. SHE popped up and asked if I needed help. Nope. This continued on throughout the store. Ms. Vest would appear to see if I needed help. It was getting annoying - I felt like she was following me make sure I didn't steal something. Finally I got the asile where what I needed was at. Oh yea it hit me, the plan was at hand. I had grabbed the tool I needed. She appeared again asking if she could be of help. I told her yes. Take off your vest and pull up your top so I can see if this nipple remover tool really works. She blushed, stammered, then stomped away.
Ok it was rude but I found it quite entertaining. Of course I don't dare show my face in that store for the next month.....

It is in the 70's and sunny so I went outside to shed some light on my assets. Took the cam with. Set the camera up then dropped my shorts and sat down. Rippppppppppppppppppppppppppp. The lounge seat literally ripped loose. Guess one too many winters outside. Of course I fall thru and get stuck. Hey the air was 70 but that ground was flat out cold. I am laughing so hard I can't get up. Try to take a picture of my situation. The damn battery in the remote control is dead. When I got up I grabbed the cam then pushed the shutter. It worked - the picture made my dick look about a half long - thanks camera. So off to Yardbirds to see what they have for closeout lawn chairs.

Just got blind sided by life again.
I just learned the father of the oldest stepdaughters child got served with a notice to appear in court for a custody hearing. To get fucking custody of his daughter!! Seems my stepdaughter was dumping her kid at the Y and not picking her up. Plus as it went on, people stayed with granddaughter until her mom showed up. Sometimes the next afternoon. So they took the granddaughter away from her mom. Holy shit. My stepdaughter is a slut at best and a crack/meth addict at worst. She has cut everyone of family out of her life. According to her we all hate her. I am the only one she periodically sent e-mails to - then only to ask for money. And only on Fridays - think she wanted money to party...DUH. I heard from her today via e-mail, no mention of her kid or the fact she lost custody. Gee you'd think maybe you might say "oh btw, they took my kid away" Maybe a real mom would be upset. I am so pissed at her right now. It's one thing to fuck up your life but you don't fuck up your kids. And I don't want to hear bullshit about her being an addict, etc. My mom was a drunk (she would go on weeks long benders) but she still was a mom to me. Not the best of moms but she tried. My mom was not out partying all night (or turning ten buck tricks at the truck stop). My mom might have been locked drunk in her bedroom but if I needed something she was there for me. All I had to do was knock (sometimes knock real hard lol). She didn't dump me at the Y then not come back at closing to pick me up.

My stepdaughter expects the world to give her a living. Just because she is here. Trust me she was not brought up that way. She saw her mom and I work for everything. Her and her siblings knew we did the best we could for them. Her mom worked one job and I worked two for a fair amount of time due to the economy of the early 1990's.

Best thing for my granddaughter is to be with her dad. Even if it is in Iowa (ok, cheap shot at someone lol). And I will do everything I can to see that she ends up with him or with her grandmother. After I know my granddaughter is safe then I may hunt down my stepdaughter. That would not be a pretty scene.

Thanks for letting me vent gang.

I had a nice day today. No matter what was thrown at me by the kosmos - it didn't get me down. I was on PTO today and gave the finger to the world.

When I spent over an hour typing a pm with intimate details about when I was 12, NN sent it cyber hell for all I know - maybe it was not meant to be shared. When my eco neighbor (who makes Ed Bagley Jr. look like a shill for big oil) got on me about charcoal grilling - no problem - ignore the source. When my main sewer line acted like tree roots were backing it up - I'll call the plumber on Monday. When one of the hit squarrels tried to steal a hot dog just off the grill and burned their mouth - karma is a bitch isn't it Rocket Jet.

Nope just took it easy. Enjoyed the 70/21C sunny day. Layed out nude for awhile. Marinated some lamb and grilled it. Threw some dogs on after I ate so they got nice and burnt. No I did not have a pedicure done Frau. But all in all a pretty damn good day.
Not to worry - I'm sure tomorrow all the normal wierdness will return to my life. LOL