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Get yourself tested first of all. Next, sit down with her and find out why this is happening. If she's just a freak and loves sex with other men, you can accept it, ask to participate or not. Especially, if kids are involved. However, a cheater cheats. So, if you think she's going to change, you're just setting yourself for more heartache. You may be better off just bouncing out of the marriage and move on.