I am shocked myself how long I have not been here. I know I have friends here and I am glad for that, and I didn't want to appear ungrateful. But things have happened which gave me some other priorities: I was not at the computer much, and English has not been so much on my mind since I stopped teaching. I have been together a lot with people who are close to me - we have been talking, and wondering, and sometimes cursing fate.
Because Maximilian, little Max, is dead. He only lived a few day. They came home from the hospital, and all was so good, and my friends happy, and then once they had a look, he was lying there peacefully. What can I say? I am in my ninth month now - an I want my daughter to live.
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