CelticOne's blog post - Wanted too much...

Wednesday, July 3, 2013, 9:56:27 PM

I'm mad!
I want to scream and cry and not make any sense at all!!!!
I'm mad at myself for getting excited about something that now isn't going to happen. I do it all the time though. I'm like a shaky bottomed piddling puppy just waiting in anticipation. I should know better but guess it's one lesson I haven't mastered yet.
I looked forward to it for weeks and even though I knew it was a shot in the dark, I had hope. Hope is gone now and it's replaced with this big hole that I don't know what to do with. I'm not even upset at the other individual, I knew all along this was only a possibility, but damnit, I WANTED IT!!!! I want things to be different. I want them to be easier. I want to finally be the one that just lets go and doesn't worry about what's next. I guess maybe I just want too much because in the end I'm right back where I started.
It's odd for me to blog like this but wanted it in writing what I was feeling in the event I get snarky or sassy with any of you. I'll be back to normal in a day or so....once I find something to hope in again.

Comments

Others Have Said:

LoneWolf_SS on 3-Jul-13 22:25:18

big hug (((((((((Celtic))))))

needs on 3-Jul-13 22:25:18

I think we've all felt that way a time or two. *hugs* You're not alone!

JediMasterBater on 3-Jul-13 23:28:49

*hugs*

OldTroubador on 4-Jul-13 1:52:11

Big hugs lady !!!

rockhard6isback on 4-Jul-13 1:56:33

You wont be back to normal until I make you laugh and smile. There is no reason to be upset at yourself, hope is just that.... HOPE. You should always hope for something to happen that you want. The important thing is to remember that it is the ability to let go and move forward is most important.

bighoss2 on 8-Jul-13 20:53:14

Big holes are handy. You fill them with tons of unrelated stuff and then cover them all over at once. Just make sure you are drunk when you draw the map. It's not a pleasant place to find your way back to later.