Suspended from work for a day, so my holiday's started a day early.

I had this picture sitting, might be a lot of black and whites, this holiday, as the weather does not look great, end of the day, getting out, is the important bit. Will be hitting the coast, over the next few days, time to visit an old friend, to long since, I have been to that part of the coast. Time to get my arse down, those cliff's and see, what I get pictures off.

My plan is kind of simple, put the long lens on the camera and use my phone for everything else, saves changing lenses.

Enjoy your day everyone..

I have always been good at hiding things, not always a good thing, but my way of seeing it was, I was not giving anyone else something to worry about. My way of coping works for me.

Like when I am feeling lonely, I stay offline. When I am stressed, I walk , when I am really down, the camera it the saviour. A long time ago, I had counselling, The Doctor got me really back on track and the suicidal thoughts, that were there, I got over.

I walked this morning, usual short stroll, Venus, was so bright in the sky, 3 tawny owls calling, from different areas, I wonder if, they are talking to each other. As I went into the woods, on the road, someone, was walking, down headlight lighting there path, I started wearing one, at all times, these early mornings now, when it is really dark, I even turn it on, but mostly, I can see, well enough.

I was thinking of my holidays, what I hoped to get done. A really heavy fall of snow, is second on my list of what I was hoping for on Christmas Day, more chance of that than my ultimate gift on Christmas day, I am all done with the prep work for Christmas, a little bit of food shopping.

I sat on the little bench, at the memorial, wind was blowing in, but I can watch the world for just a little while. Thinking shortest day this week, 3 days to work, mind is always running at a 100mph.


From last Saturday as I was walking home,, I got one of my all time favourite photo's a few minutes later. I tend never to post these online. Once it was about the views, but this one I did, for now, I take pictures for me firstly. Did it do well or not, it does not matter.

Not really much snow, but I liked the sky and the birds flying somewhere, just adds to it all..

I keep fighting but sometimes, close to defeat, but tomorrow is another day, start it all fresh and just see.

6-05am, as I write this been up for a hour, it has been snowing overnight, not a lot, going to head out in a hour or so, see, if I can get a few pictures, not trying for the one, that I said would end my blogs for good, not that time yet.

Been frosty all week, as low as -7 when I cycled to work , but all dressed for that and it no problem. So much to think about.

I am one day early with the blog, I forgot it was not Sunday. but does it matter.

I messaged a few people this week and not one reply, was just a hello , it is all I ever do, it led me to think when was the last tine someone actually messaged me, to see how I was , that is a very very long time.

I made a few people at work happy, I had one off my feelings, looked at the horse racing, not one, but two horses, said to my workmate, and left it at that , both won and first i knew, was when he came running up to me, shouting they won, they won, he won 4 figures, he had never won money like that before, I got 5 other thank you as well, one was not so happy, as he said that one would never win, it was the biggest price of the two. I think it was just after my stroke, when I got back to work, was the last time, I had the feeling. I still never had a penny on them and that still never bothered me.

A long time ago now, this weekend, would be the start of the Christmas shopping for us, her dad would keep giving us lists and our job was to make sure, we got everything for everyone and then a few days before Christmas, in his pub, it would be the Christmas party, where it was all dished out to the children of the people that worked for him and the old ones, Poverty was bad , we had to deliver food as well and as write this tears run down my cheeks, some memories, still get me...

Both long gone now, me I have my memories.


Yesterday, was time to try and get that silky look of the long exposure with the phone, one of my crossing points, as the last of the sun kissed the bamboo on the side and just the right was coming over. Amazing how easy this is to do with the Iphone, the phone does all the work, once again it amazes me, just what a phone can do.

Little bit later on writing my blog today, I was trying my hand at making Soda Scones this morning around my usual time of 8am. Edible but needing a little bit of work, thing my mix, was just a little too wet and my pan was to heavy, so judging the heat was not quite right. But will try again during the week..

I decided yesterday not to post in status anymore for a while or if at all, will still say hello, but that will be it, after all these years, I saw, that my post are maybe just not what people want to see.

It was the coldest morning of the winter so far yesterday, but wrapped up and it was just great to walk in, was back home before it was daylight.

I got my double vaccine shot on Thursday and it went well, usual pain in the left arm, that I always get, still waiting in word for my second Macular injection, looking more and more it will be on the last week, that I work this year, that means, it will be close to a 3 week break for me.

I ask myself questions all the time, work out the answers sometimes, sometimes not. I was reminded at work of someone, that I once was, but thankfully not now and hopefully never will have to be again.

I took further steps in my new project.


Another phone picture. I would have been happy getting this with my DSLR, never mind a phone, one little bit, I am not happy with, but overall, this phone, just keeps surprising me, with what I can do, I am going to try putting it on my little tripod and see, what I can get, I just like learning.

My injection went well, last Monday, you can feel the pressure , but that is all, apart from seeing bubbles at first. the whole process took about 10 minutes when I got taken through, the prep and sitting waiting about 40 mins, so 50 minutes all in, which flew in.

Best thing is, my vision is so much better, I honestly never thought it would happen as quick, I did think, it might take a couple of injections, but the difference is truly amazing, the people who come up with these treatments are amazing people and as many slag of our NHS, never have I and never will I.

So for the next 3 days, off work, back on Thursday for one day and the weekend.

My loud moth cousin came out with one of her words of wisdom about me, been hearing these for 50yrs now, she does it to see, if I will react, but I never do.. her latest was along the lines, off you are single as you have nothing to offer any woman, that was a new one, my normal reaction given, I just smiles, now she will not talk to me for months lol.

I probably use my shyness as a guard. sometimes, we connect with people, but most of the time, we don't.

Julie use to say, I was a contradiction, but Julie said so many things. As I have got older, I do see, what she meant.

I am taking the whole Christmas break, I did think about working in between, but will put my holiday sheet in tomorrow.

In the New Year, I really start the quest to be a National Champion once again, a totally new thing to try this time, but I always need something to occupy my time , with added bonus of some really nice pictures.


I looked down the slope towards the river and there was just this little pocket of golden colours hiding there, it was raining and I sat for a few moments, just smiling. The Stranglers were in my head,, the song Golden Brown, was I singing , well you would have had to have been there, to find out..

I Was the closest yet to getting a dog the other day, she was a really beautiful merle collie, melted my heart straight away, but she was the one the breeder was keeping for themselves, now how serious was I , well I offered them more than double what they were selling the pups for to start with and then went a little bit more. Truly the one that got away.

Still gutted now, as I write this.

3 mornings of frost and I have walked in two of them, missed the fog Friday morning, as I had to be in town. But I am really not sure, if I will ever see such colour again in my lifetime, even this morning, as I walked through the woods in the dawning light, I had the phone out and snapping away..

Tomorrow, I get my first injection.

I started a new adventure last Sunday, back to school . Learned a bit, but so much more to learn, added bonus of giving me some beautiful things to take pictures of,, will also get to make videos for my little Youtube channel, which is more of a record for myself.
I only wish that I had someone, to share this journey with me, but you can't have everything in life.


Keep trying with this one, but still just not, what I have in my head, this was shot when it was still pretty dark, but the idea looked better than the result.


Yesterday, just as I was walking home, side light shing on my Road, where, it all began and one day, where it will all end, decided today, as I was walking home again, if I ever get , a picture with it covered in snow at first light, that will be me done with here. Will be a simple blog, I even wrote it in my head.

I sat last night, looking out the window, people were letting off, some fireworks and it was a nice little display, like every year, since i have taken pictures, I say the same thing, need to get some pictures.

But it is probably one of those things, I will never do.

I never walk far this morning, the light was flat, but I bumped into someone once again, all different times and in different spots, we exchange a hello, I clapped her dog and we walked off different ways. She carries a camera, with her sometimes, maybe I will ask, what she takes pictures of sometimes and she does have a nice smile.

I might have said it before, but my god the colours of Autumn this year are so fantastic, not sure, I have ever seen them in such a way in my lifetime around here or is it, I have just not noticed.

I have only used the phone, but it has worked well for me, enjoying learning just how it works and its limitations. as well. I am impressed, that is for sure. I shoot it in raw, then put them on a SSD and then import onto the computer, so I can have a look at them in Lightroom, from there if I like any I edit them, some do look better on the small phone screen and when on my large monitor , just not what I am looking for.

One thing that I have noticed is, the lack of noise in the shadows, its, where it usually really shows, it is all very interesting.


One I took the other day, a scene, I have looked at before, but the light was just so nice, never easy shooting into the sun, but the pieces all just fit. Now a very similar picture I took, got selected as one of the best pictures posted in Flickr, now if you had ever asked me, If a picture I had taken on a phone, could manage that for me, I would have just laughed.

Not my normal cup of tea, as i write this one, but a Lemsip instead.

What is it all about, wonder about that sometimes. Challenges constantly get thrown at me, with the way my eyes are, so many things, I can not be bothered with, one is just sitting reading for a while, my concentration is just not there, sadly even worse, it is the same with the camera, I like chasing the small things, but I can not focus enough to find them, it has been frustrating , in the end, I have put my macro gear all away.

Landscape wise it has been not much better, when I manually focus, I am just missing that bit of sharpness, might just have to shoot larger things for now.

I have never bought the newest model of a top end phone, , usually I am a year or two behind, but after having my last one for over 5 years and I think it was a year old tech before that, I bought a new model of the Iphone, 15 Pro and well, tech has sure jumped forward in those 6 years, It is crazy what these phones can do, any phone is just like any camera, you use what you like. For now, I am sure, I will take more pictures with the phone, than I did before and not even tried the video yet, for when I make my Youtube videos. It will never replace my DSLR cameras, but you know what, taking a picture is more important to me, than what I am using to take it with. I only got that recently, when having a bad day and seeing something, only having the phone and I had that same feeling, that I get when using the DSLR, that smile on my face, that happy moment.

So now, I can take that raw file into Lightroom and edit it on the larger screen, today, as it is wet and I might not get out, that might be my project.

But for now, will post this one, not the best, but for now, It gave me the smile,that is what matters.

I got word for my visit to the eye clinic, looks as if, I might have to have a day or two off from work each time, I go, if it is on a Monday, migt see, if I can get a day later in the week.

I never work weekends, they try to get me, but this week, they asked what it would take, I said an extra £4 an hour on my basic rate and when they said we can negotiate, I jumped it too £4.50 an hour, guess, I will not be working weekends lol.

I have had a fantastic weekend to be honest, I got to the coast on Friday, wind was off shore, so no big wave action, but I did manage to get a couple, I am happy with, but sitting looking out to the sea, memories always come flooding back, as much as the woods have shaped my life, the coast has, as well. Truth be told, it is my favourite place, any bit of coast, it has that attraction, because my visits, are few and far between, I enjoy it all the more.


Once that might have been me, like I said memories, in my younger days, I fished here so many times. now there is not a lot to catch, but still people try, I am not able to cast a rod now, but I have my thoughts.