So I'm like totally shaking right now. Let me set the scene:

I don't do horror movies well. At all. AT ALLLLL. So I saw the previews and some clips of paranormal activity and as I'm getting ready for bed I'm getting all sorts of creeped out. But I set my tv on a timer, turn of the light and hide under the covers to go to sleep. Then around 12:15 or so, there suddenly these THREE FUCKING LOUD BANGS that literally just SHAKE the rooms around me and it scares the shit out of me, but I'm half a sleep so I about ignore it and almost fall asleep again, until I hear it AGAIN. Three fucking horrific loud bangs that just SHAKE the rooms.

So I finally get out of bed, pull on some pants and a jacket and rush out of my room and there's some girls in my hall and my suitemate Nicky and we're all trying to figure out what's going on.

Well, apparently the R.A.'s are starting some sort of Boo-gram thing or whatever.

yeah... So now that Nicole is scared out of her mind and I'm scared out of my mind we're totally all freaked out and I'm wide awake again.

Not cool.

Christ, i wish I could stop shaking. Times like this I REALLY wish I had a roommate again.

So I got my short story critiqued today. Now, I've been having some MAJOR anxiety over this. Nothing too disruptive, but a lot of nervousness and I even had a nightmare where the reviews were mostly: "This story made me die a little on the inside." So it's been bugging me, this critique thing.

But I had my today and it went very well. Class in general seemed to like it, and the older lady in the class with all sorts of writing experience told me she thought it was "brilliant" and a very "smart piece." She also told me in the edited copy of my story that she thought it was by far the best story in the class so far, which was a REALLY big compliment.

There were a few issues here or there, but nothing all that big, so I was a little relieved. The class spent more time talking about alternate endings or how to add MORE suspense and horror and it was stuff like that I was looking for, so I was really pleased.

All around, good results. I'll probably post the finished copy here and let ya'll read =) it'll probably be super long, so maybe I'll need to break it up. It's already about 20 pages, and basically the class is asking me to add another 10 or 15 pages. Haha.

Right now I'm just rewriting the short story I did LAST semester to resubmit to this class, since we gotta submit a second one soon. This way I can just get it out of the way and don't have to write something new. Short stories really give me trouble.

Had my first caffeine high today. I woke up this morning and dad and I went to a local hole-in-the-wall breakfast place that we love and waited up for mom. we had to get there EARLY to get seats, so we arrive at about 8:45 and mom's supposed to meet us at 9:30. So we got a wait. So I'm just sitting there drinking coffee with dad and chatting about school and future plans and all that good jazz.

Anyway, coffee is a new thing in my life. I only started drinking it maybe a few months ago out of nowhere. It just happened, like Catholicism and a recent LOVE of football. I barely recognize myself anymore.

Anywho, so dad and I are just sitting around drinking coffee for about 45 minutes and finally mom arrives. By that time I realize I'm feeling REALLY jittery and I can not for the life of me slow down my talking, I'm just going and going and going and if no one's talking then I start talking and my legs are bouncing and I'm bouncing. And my parents laugh and we all realize I'm on a caffeine high.

It was pretty wild. I don't think I liked it much, though it made driving a little nice, since everything went by so fast. Still, I didn't like that I couldn't slow down and that I felt so nervous and jittery. It was a little wild.

But I'm back at Flagler now just chilling in my room waiting to finish my homework. I got my windows open and I'm airing out the room and Transformers season 2 is on the background. It's "The Girl Who Loved Powerglide." Totally one of my favorite episodes =3

Date with pat was *wonderful*. We talked about all sorts of intelligent stuff, and then per usual the intelligence of our conversation sullied down to porn and drinking and sex and good things like that lol. He even commented on how fascinating it is that our conversations start up HERE and then get down to HERE and I told him I was just happy we were comfortable enough with each other to talk about the things we did. I asked him if he did this with any other students and he said 'no,' which made me feel really special.

Then he mentioned how he and his gf are probably goanna break up, so I gave him a little sympathy, but it was all brief. he talked about how he was kinda looking forward to the lack of stress of her and I told him I could come over now and cook for him and he said yes I could. I think we flirted a little bit. I mentioned at some point how guys always see my boobs first and he said not him, he's not a 'boob guy,' which was actually a LITTLE bit of a bummer because boobs are like, my main features. Then he said he's more of a face and ass guy so I playfully snapped my fingers and he said I shouldn't worry because I have a very pretty face and I said 'okay, but I don't have an ass.' And he says 'oh no, you do have an ass,' lmao

Anywho. He mentioned at some point how occasionally he smokes weed, which REALLY threw me off because I'm so used to him being... I dunno, not someone who smokes week lol But I mentioned I'd never tried that stuff, didnt' even know where to find it, and he said that if I wanted we could remedy that someday.

I dunno, maybe. My parents raised me on the idea of weed being evil and something lazy, stupid people do. But Patrick is neither lazy OR stupid, so I dunno. *Shrugs*

Either way, it was REALLY nice hanging out with him and I can't wait to do it again. Maybe when I come back for my birthday he'll give me my birthday wish of a kiss =3

so I decided I was totally in the mood to ride Westley today, so I put on a jacket and put my hair back and Dad decided he'd ride in his truck behind me to make sure everything was okay. Well...Westley is still in shoddy shape. We took him in and got him lowered about an inch and got the clutch and brake replaced but he needs an all around tune up.

For starters, I'll put the choke all the way out to start him, and he starts fine enough, but then as I try to gradually reduce the choke he just putters away to death, even when I try giving him gas. Now, I can understand this happening after.. *Shrugs* only a few minutes of warm up, but dad and I sat out there for about ten to fifteen minutes just letting him warm up and if I reduce the choke he still wont run. So I figure, fuck it,I'm riding him with the choke. But due to lack of practice I'm not finding that good mix of clutch and gas and kept stalling, so I'm getting frustrated, and dad's worried that since the clutch is almost all the way out still I'm just going to lose control and Westley's going to lurch.

So I'm stuck in the middle of the road and this vehicle wants to pass so I use muh awesome leg muscles and scoot over some, and they drive down this little street right beside me that's a cul-de-sac and dad tells me he'd like me to go ahead and put Wesley away and I sigh and agree. So then another vehicle comes by full of teenagers and they're pointing and laughing at me (seriously, I shit you not) and then the OTHER vehicle comes around and just kinda watches me.

*Sighs*

So I feel like shit.

At least i get to see Patrick tonight. I figure come Christmas dad and I will take Westley to a local bike place and we'll have them five him a FULL tune up and fix every problem he has, such as the kickstand being a kill switch, for some stupid reason.

So I'm home for the weekend. Muh Aunt's getting married so I came in for it. It was a pretty nice drive over. I wasn't able to leave until 3:30, since my writing class didn't let out until 3:15, and I HAD to go to that ONE class in particular because I needed the new stories. Oi. lol

It's nice to be home. It just feels good here. I really can't wait to come back for Christmas. Totally the best time of the year.

So I may not be able to go to Flagler for another 2 years, since I just can't afford it. I just don't HAVE 20,000 dollars to use for education. Ash can't either, due to the fact her parents need her at home to help provide another source of income. We're both a little down at the idea, but we're trying to think of the bright sides.

This weekend I'm also hoping to meet up with the man of my dreams =3 that smexy former teacher of mine. Hopefully we'll be able to meet up. ^_^

I don't get it. I just don't get it. So I finally get to the point of psyching myself out at the idea of going on a date with this dude from eharmony. I mean, it's fucking eharmony, it should be great, shouldn't it? It should be okay. Sure there's a few duds, but what are the chances that I'LL get the dud? Because I always got the dud before, maybe now will be different!

So I talk to this guy a bit more after a bit a silence where he had to go on a trip to Germany (Germany, I mean, that's pretty cool!) and he's got his master's degree, a good job, he sounds like an okay guy. Sure out first conversation he kinda threw me off by telling me some stories I wouldn't necessarily tell a girl the first time talking to her, but still.

But I'm finally opening myself up to the idea that i'm never going to meet the *perfect* man. This Psychology of Romantic Love class has been helping in that way! I'm accepting that they're not going to be perfect, they will have their flaws, but I can learn to overlook that.

So I get pretty cool about seeing this guy and I'm just waiting for a text from him asking when we wanna hook up and meet.

Then this evening I got that text!

And it wasn't asking when we want to meet...

It was asking if I wanted a nude pic of him.

*Sigh*

I don't want perfect but I'd prefer someone with a little class. We've had ONE telephone conversation, a few messages on eharmony and some texts back and forward. I'm actually rather offended considering I actually flirted with the guy only once. I don't think I'm a classy girl but I don't think I present myself in a way that eludes a sex-only interest.

I mean... ffs...

*Sighs*

Anyway, fuck romance, fuck dating, fuck meeting a guy, fuck it all. I'm just not interested anymore. because obviously it wasn't meant for me.

So the weekend with the parents was nice. Well, week in general. Besides the drama of me deciding to try and stay another two years at college. Luckily, I only gotta raise about 10,000 dollars for an entire extra year, which is less than I thought. Meh. We'll see what happens *le sigh*

I got well fed though, which was wonderful. Probably put on plenty of weight considering how minimal my diet is during college. I'm looking forward to the idea of staying here with Ash though. I think that would be the coolest. We got along REALLY well that one week in her apartment. Besides the one spat, which she barely even remembers, but in general we got along very well and we always wanted to do the college experience together.

This does take away bragging rights of me graduating two years early. Well...I'll already have everything I NEED to graduate, I'm just staying for another minor.

...

Is a Bachelor's Degree with a Major in Psychology and a double minor in Creative Writing and Fine Arts impressive anyway? o.O;;

I sound like a yuppie, don't I?

so the parents came into town for a visit. It's been REALLY nice having them around. The first night we went out to eat and then last night we basically went to TGIF for just soup and desert and tonight dad reheated some left overs they brought along for the trip.

It's just been fantastic being able to relax at the rig with them, not worry about school, play with the dogs, and be fed. Lol, the being fed part is especially a favorite of mine xD I figure before they leave though I'll take them out somewhere on me, since they've been keeping me well fed these past few days and probably will for the next few days as well.

tomorrow dad plans to slow cook some ribs in baked beans and grilled beans =3

Ash and I have been talking recently and she's decided she wants to come to my college too as a Fine Arts major, but she totally doesn't want to go alone. And I've always wanted to actually take art classes, so we figured that she'll apply here and (hopefully) get accepted and I'll change my graduation date to give me another year or two and take up a Fine Arts minor and we could room together. I gotta figure out where I'm goanna get the money though.

Since it's a minor for me it's only 29 credits. I got VA and Bright Futures, but those don't kick in until AFTER I start classes. So I gotta think of how I'm going to get that initial 4-7 thousand dollars lol I figure I can work REALLY hard over the summer whatEVER hours my boss wants me to work. Mom said either manager would gladly take me back, so hopefully that'll still be the case come summer term.

If not *sigh* who knows? My line of credit is only for 20 thousand and I've already taken out 14 thousand of that to pay for these past three semesters and apparently we can't extend it out or add to it. Bugger.

So, hopefully I'll think of something. I dunno *sigh* I wish I had a little more confidence in myself, because then I'd try to be a stripper, but let's be honest, I'm just way too shy.

Anybody know any get rich quick schemes?

Pretty awesome. The first hour was REALLY boring to the part the girls and I were wondering if perhaps we should leave. But then everyone got mostly drunk and the music and dancing really got stated and we stayed.

I walked in hoping some guys would dance with us, cause you always see guys grinding against girls and stuff and I wanted that to happen, cause I thought it would look like fun. Wellies, it did =) and...after a while it got REALLY annoying. Lmao It started with this one guy that just walked up behind Nicole and started grinding against her, and then he went to me and we danced for a while. Then there was some guy that was REALLLLLLYYYYY into Ash. He danced with her almost all night, and urged Nicole and I to do the same. He was really grabby and pinchy. I think he had a bondage fetish. Not that I have a problem with that stuff. But at some point he kinda held onto my neck and he was biting Ash a lot. lol

At some point I got sandwiched between four people. It was the guy dancing behind Ash, Ash, me, Nicole, and then some guy dancing up behind Nicole.

It was kinda smexy =3

I gots covered in paint, and at some point I got paint tossed in my eye, since people just had bottles and were squeezing and tossing paint randomly. That one hurt.

All around it was a lot of fun and Ash and I figure we might hit clubs more often. But Day Glow was a blast and we're totally going to go to the next one, whenever it happens.

I gots pictures below. Now here's the kicker: those clothes are CLEAN. Paint came RIGHT off. Lmao

Me:

Ash:

Nicole:

All Three =3