Dream_Angel's blog post - Feb 28th....

Wednesday, February 15, 2006, 7:20:17 PM

Im leaving FL. Im going HOME!!! After the day I had yesterday, I decided its time for me to face the world back home. the 5th will be one year. and I need to be there to put flowers at the cemetary. Even though everyone has offered to do it for me, I NEED TO BE THE ONE TO DO IT! Im very frustrated with myself. I need to see my kids, and my old friends.

I found out recently that a very old friend of mine (that i haven't spoken to in 5 years) has moved back to Texas. The time that she was away was horrible for her, and she was into drugs VERY BAD!! Anyway, I need to see her, and slap her around for not letting me know that she was even alive for those 5 years.

I need to hug my grandmother, before its too late to do so. I need to fight with my mommy. I need to kiss my kids (susies kids) I need to touch base with everything that i used to be, so I can determine WHY i am who I am now, and Where I am going with my life. Its TIME. I've been living on edge for long enough. Its time for me to face the facts. Things are never going to be like they used to be. Its always going to hurt around this time of year. It is not going to go away.
I have to stop making excuses as to why I don't let people in, and why i have this HUGE wall built up.
I'm 23 years old. Its time to grow up and face the world. FULL FORCE...not just a little bit at a time because Im scared. FUCK BEING SCARED. what is there to be scared of? I've hurt enough in my short life for lots of people twice my age. SO.....its time to get over it!

on a Happier note, I will finally get a good fuckin hair cut and highlight job. My Best friend there is the BEST hairstylist EVER. and I can't find one here to do my hair worth a crap. They always cut it too short, or don't cut it right!

Sebastian is going home with me....so thats going to be a FUN ride!! lol

Comments

Others Have Said:

dirtycouple on 15-Feb-06 19:27:14

I hope your trip will be a safe one and you can work out what you need to. Good luck with the puppy in the car...he'll do fine. :) Wonder how far we'll be away from each other...TX is where I live :)

flcamfan on 15-Feb-06 19:28:21

I think it is an excellent idea to take a trip home. Never let too much time pass between visits. Take care and have a great trip!

longhotshowers on 15-Feb-06 21:07:25

This is wonderful! Never leave things undone in your life. Make peace with who you need to and do the bonding you need to do with your family. Don't forget to bring a diary with you to keep those thoughts written down. I will miss you, hun, but I am so glad to see you doing this! Hope to talk to you when ever I can. Love ya!!!

third4tx on 15-Feb-06 22:18:06

That's more like it..Texas waits with open arms. Hugs and Kisses.

valleybud on 15-Feb-06 22:23:10

:) That's my girl! Although I'm gonna miss the hell outta not talking to you, I'll still be smiling! Along with the diary, take lots and lots of pics too!

/me sneaks inside Dreamy's suitcase for the trip! :P

Strawberry on 15-Feb-06 22:38:36

Well I hope you do get to go! I am sure they all miss you bunches! Love ya lots girl!

texami on 15-Feb-06 22:56:18

have fun in texas... and do what you need to do. i'll be extra-smiley knowing you're in the state! ;)

Raj on 16-Feb-06 3:14:52

Home is where the healing is!! Kisses Babe.

Fortyhboobs on 16-Feb-06 4:14:32

You gotta do what you gotta do. Hope you find what you need there, sweetheart. *big hugs & kisses*