Misspriss's blog post - Drowning

Thursday, September 10, 2020, 10:07:49 PM

Not sure how I got here.
Not sure how long I'll be.
Just know that I am drowning and I've forgotten how to swim.

I don't even know how to describe what I am feeling. Empty. Sad. Angry. Alone. Dark.
Alone.

I have no one to reach out to.
Not a single friend who would not just say, "oh, I get sad too"
I want to scream. It's NOT SADNESS. I don't know what it is.
I don't want to die. It's not that at all.
Shit, why is that where so many people go?
Or why do they say, "Oh but you have survived Cancer/Heart issues/losing people you love, surely you've got this. You will be fine."
FUCK YOU. Maybe it's not about wanting you to try to "fix" me, but maybe, just maybe I need someone to hear me. To just listen and tell me I see you, I hear you, it's not shameful to feel broken.

I'll probably delete this if I remember it's here. But here I am a faceless, nameless set of boobs. No one wants to tell me to "smile, just be happy." They just want boobs.

Comments

Others Have Said:

RavingLunatic on 11-Sep-20 18:57:37

I see you, I hear you, it's not shameful to feel broken.

flitterbee on 12-Sep-20 6:49:46

I see you and hear you and it is ok to feel broken..... I too am feeling broken at the moment

lip2lip on 12-Sep-20 7:17:05

Waves! Koooooowwwweeeeeee over here, that’s it now, Breath relax, be you and just try enjoy life as it’s meant to be xx

discover1 on 14-Sep-20 2:23:36

Breath deep , close your eyes . Friends are here. Clam and cool . Never fear the future.

starrider59 on 16-Nov-20 14:53:38

Each day I start with a finger stick. It happens 6-8 x a day. Every shower I search my feet. Every month blood draws to check my kidneys. Every sneeze I have to ask if this is it! I feel your pain. I have no answer. I just enjoy every day as a bonus. I will always love you my special friend.