I find it hard to deal with the fact that some people are so filthy in their lives they are inconsiderate. Enter my sister - the one that I live with unfortunately. There is not a "Mr. Clean" in the world large enough to take care of the whole place - but..........she leaves next week for a work thing - so one of my other sisters and I are going to swamp the place out and organize it. I started today..........but wow.........it doesn't look like I've done anything lol.

Oh well - I'm not perfect - none of us are. I realize that my talking about her bad habits is in itself another bad habit.

So - go ahead - line up to spank the Squishter ......go on....both cheeks or just one

xooxxoxooxoxo

Geeg

I made a comment earlier in the blogs that I was hoping to find love. Well I have decided that IF I find love fine - but a good friendly screw from a good friend is just fine

I'm also starting a children's book folks - so please please wish me luck. I'm writing that under a pseudonym also however - wouldn't want someone's parents to say "Hey - I've seen that bitch 'nekkid!"

Thank you to a close friend who called yesterday and talked me out of my pity party.....I had a good one going too lol - but he knew what to do Thank you so much - I am much better today sweetie. xoxoxoxoxoxoGreg

SG

I'm not sure I'm liking this stuff....my head is all scrambled up and I keep remembering weird things...and then not remembering other things at all. And everyone I see looks familiar somehow..it's very odd.

I'm very sad, lonely, and despondent (I try to use a big word now and then) tonight - I have no where to turn either. My family is with the therapist on this one - and I wanted to try anything to get better....but now I'm not so sure.

Geeg

Wow - it's different. That's about all I can say. I'm tired, dizzy and a bit nauseated.

In other news - the jerk I lived with recently still won't hand over, or let me come get, my stuff. I am at a loss - the cops won't help unless he had beaten me and such. The lawyers can help for a spendy amount......so I don't know what to do. I am trying to see if his minister can get in touch with him - my next stop is another church he may now be attending.......I think he switched churches. If not - I will talk to my psychiatrist to talk to his co-worker (my ex friends psychiatrist) to see if she can intervene. Something has to work.

Anyway - later folks,

Geeg

The lights will go out for me temporarily - and then I shall awaken to confusion, memory loss, and just generally being gorked out.

I'm talking about my upcoming ECT - I actually have an appointment and everything for the start of this series YAY - why so excited? I am sick of the waiting for this to start - the waiting is not knowing.........and I hate the not knowing.

I'm also starting on some art projects - just trying the whole art therapy thing. Trying to let go of my perfectionism will be hard - but that's not the point of art therapy - it's just supposed to be an exercise in doing whatever you want whatever it looks like. Still my perfectionistic attitude will try to take over.

Well I shall see you all on the flip side.............wait - this place IS the flip side lol.

Later,
Geeg

Hello - you sent me a pm worried that everyone including I, think you are the one writing the nasty pm's to everyone. Nope - I do not. I will keep your identity a secret. I know who the real culprit is and he has tried to be my friend before - but I wouldn't trust him with a ten foot pole. So dear friend - no worries.

On another note - I have now been accused of stealing $200 worth of towels (crappy ones at that), shampoos (mostly used up and some empty bottles) and king and queen size bedding from my ex bf/roommate/friends house. Yeah right! Trust me if I was a thief - I'd steal good shit.

I found out too late that he was a Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde type....he takes Oxycodone and other pain pills with various benzo's like they are candy...........all prescribed of course - but still - if you don't use them properly you become addicted - hell if you do use them properly you can become addicted.

I had to leave behind many items when I moved three weeks ago but he assured me that I was welcome back anytime, and that yeah this might help us work on our friendship more and then after my ECT treatments I could move back. Suddenly Mr Hyde has reared his ugly head and then all this "thieving" accusations came out.

I had to employ a lawyer for $75 to write a nasty letter telling him the law - but I did tell the lawyer that I can't afford to sue - if I just get back the family heirlooms then I'm happy. Everything else can be replaced eventually. But we have a dispute resolution center here - so maybe they can help. We shall see.

The good news is that my psychiatrist is back Monday and hopefully this week I will find out when we will be starting the ECT. I'm scared of course - but something has to be done.

Kisses to all,
Geeg
PS - to all my dear friends here - if I felt you had done me wrong I would say so privately - don't sweat it.

I have received a couple pm's over the last couple of months or so from someone who quickly removes their new identity and all I find when I look them up is "member not found". Well - I am fairly certain I know who it is. I will tell YOU this you chicken sh** - if you had called me friend before - don't bother now. You have made vile remarks to me twice now about a very dear friend of mine whom I have dined with. His character will NOT be assasinated.

Sadly - if you are who I think you are - I thought you were a nice guy - now I just think you are a sad little boy who has nothing better to do than make vile nasty comments about good people - and people you've probably never met and don't really truly know.

Don't pm me again jerk.

Geeg

Wow - it's July 4th already - and in a couple/three weeks I should be starting ECT. I did my preliminary tests for the 'durn thing. Yes - my ekg is great, the girls were x-rayed (well the whole chest was) - but I didn't get to see that and some bitch nurse decided that she really hates taking people's blood..........or someone cut her off in traffic - I'm not sure. All I know is that it hurt bad enough for the needle to go in the first time that when she jammed it in deeper to keep draining me of blood I wanted to take her outside and beat.........well I suppose I can't say that here. Anyway you get the idea.

However, if the reports are true about the ECT - I won't remember her............damn!!!!!

Talk soon and be safe folks - those of you that are lucky enough to have legal fireworks.

Geeg

I finally had my consulation for ECT - and I will be starting the treatments in July. Yep - I'm nervous - but something has to help the severe depressive episodes I get into. It's not just bad pms - it's practically daily. No mania.........which is good really from what I hear - but I'm tired of feeling so damned depressed and you can't just "get over it" when it's this bad. Meds. haven't helped a bit - so it's time to get zapped.

I'll update people later if you want to know about it.......that is if they don't fuck up and take all my brains (about 2 pennies worth lol)

Kisses and be kind to each other please,
Geeg

I have an announcement to make - I will be on temporary hiatus from NN - not leaving - not deleting the account. Personal reasons - but if you've read the blog you'll know I live with an asshole freakazoid jackass.

Oh - I forgot - I shouldn't have asked any of you to not adjust your sets.............go ahead and play with your sets of anything you have...........your neighbor has...........your partner has......................your partners friend has..............you get the idea.

Geeg