Team Sleep's blog post - singleness

so in earlier blogs I wrote about having several simultaneous lovers over the winter.

this was great and fun and sexy and all that, though it was hard work physically and emotionally to keep everyone happy. I think I did quite well considering the proximity and the different, somewhat difficult personality types I dealt with. but no one ever thinks about how these things are going to end. I had different expectations of how things were going to go; I didn't expect to have two harsh and disruptive breakups within a day of each other.

however, this all ended about a day before I was planning to move across the country. on one hand it was extremely stressful to deal with that on top of the normal stresses of moving. on the other hand, it was awesome to be able to put so much literal and figurative distance between myself and my memories, my pain, my drama. and, of course, to begin anew in every sense of the word.

from August 2004 to August 2005 I was celibate on purpose (or tried to be; I slipped up a couple times about nine months in and made out with some cute boys). it kept me out of trouble for my 19th year of life. I came out of it stronger, more confident and more sexual than ever. but since the end of that year, I've pretty much been in non-stop romantic and/or sexual relationships of some form, whether intense emotional involvements, FWB arrangements, serious and not-so-serious relationships, multiple partnerships... whatever. playing lots of different roles in the lives of others. so I think I am overdue for another season of celibacy.

I have been whining lately about moving to a new town where there are very few people period, never mind very few attractive people who I can sleep with without getting fired. but this is probably a good thing. I think it is healthy for me to once again draw back and catch my breath and let the whirlwind of sexual activity subside. I of course still post here, and still masturbate up a storm, still buy toys and read everything I can about sex. but I am pretty much just being sexual with myself. just me and my brain.

after two years this might get real old; once I return to civilization I'm sure I'll be craving so much dick and pussy I won't be able to contain myself when I'm suddenly surrounded by hot single people again. but until then I'm sure I will also be learning a lot of new things.

I do have some other projects to work on... naming my dildos. I decided on "Lucky" for the purple one, that seems to be popular. the big black one is Carlton. what of the other dozen or so in my dresser? how will I ever keep them all straight? is it bad if I fuck so many dildos and can't remember all their names? I think that makes me a slut...