Team Sleep's blog post - HI EVERYONE

how's it going!!!

I'm pretty happy with life. it's springtime! it's a lot colder than it was last year, but still really nice. it's around 4am here and the sun is already coming up... and I see like 28453829 bears each day, craziness!

I'm not as enthusiastic with small-town life anymore. I thought I would be able to handle it, but it's getting to me. it's mostly the way everyone is all up in each other's business. no one has anything better to talk/think about than what their neighbour is up to. no one has anything better to do, so the slightest things become cause for huge concern. my life is mostly drama-free but only because I keep to myself a lot and leave town almost every weekend to visit my boyfriend.

on that note, things are really great with him. I know with my last few entries, back in October and November, I was wondering whether I was really in love with him or whether I was merely in lust. the words "I love you" kept bubbling up on my tongue but I was trying so hard to not express them because I was scared. well, I'm happy to report that after that entry I wrote on October 5, I got the nerve to tell him how I felt.

it's been gravy ever since. we both have strong personalities so sometimes it gets challenging. I think the best is that we both consciously choose to act lovingly towards each other. he is truly kind, strong, compassionate, and self-aware, more so than anyone else I've ever met. the communication in our relationship is amazing as he's really intelligent, perceptive and articulate. he speaks his mind about what he wants instead of just assuming I'll figure it out. resentment has no place in our relationship. the sex is amazing, because of communication, his enthusiasm, playfulness, and super high libido -- higher than mine!!! he doesn't take himself too seriously and isn't afraid to be silly. and finally, he's dead sexy. seriously, he's amazing to look at.

I am so lucky.

the best part is that, at a point in the not so distant past, I was worried I would never reach this again. I thought I could never again love someone fully, and that I would never meet someone who satisfied me, and that I would never experience that intensity of feeling. and here I am, feeling it in abundance and knowing it is the healthiest and strongest relationship I've ever been in.

there's a depth of love and feeling that I never thought possible. but there is also just a pure goodness and kindness that comes from him being simply amazing! like, he is just a really good person. integrity is really important to me, and he has that. he is totally about personal growth and becoming a better person at every turn. he is not afraid to admit when he is wrong and take real, tangible steps to fix things when he's screwed up. just knowing there are really people out there -- people who AREN'T just about manipulating and misusing others to get what they want, people who aren't clueless or cowardly or cruel -- it makes me so happy to be in the world.

and he has a really really nice cock. you should see it. seriously, it's a porn-worthy cock. I tell him all the time, but he already knew that before I came along.

so anyway, I'm happy and sexually satisfied, but that's not what I haven't been on NN. I think I wrote here before that I've been spending a bunch of time on fetlife. there are a few nuances to sexuality and to my relationship that I find are either beyond the scope of NN, or aren't openly discussed, or discussed in a way that doesn't do anything for me. but I have definitely missed NN, too. mostly because I miss blogging... and the hilarity of the forums. but there are a few people here who are dear to my heart. fetlife ain't got nothin' on that. so, here I am.