... Well, I wouldn't actually know who and what I'm looking for.
I have to admit that, whenever I see comments on my pictures here or another site I post on (about as often), I check the commenter's profile. Age, gender, location, preferences... I can't help but look for those who fit my "compatibility range". And what for ? Nothing ! I know that I just don't have the option of ever entertaining such relationships. My life isn't set up for it.
But even if I could...
I just don't think that I'd ever really be happy. No matter how beautifully things would work out.... I can't help being miserable. Filled with hope and desire for something... better. Meaning. Purpose. Happiness. But that's just an illusion, far from reality.
And so I will forever mourn the loss of what I never had.. because it just doesn't exist. |