A few days ago I was behind a guy at a checkout and he said to the cashier "are you going to the veterans day parade? I'll be the oldest guy marching!" I asked him how he knew he'd be the oldest.
He said "Well, there is one guy older...but they chopped off both his legs last week...so that leaves ME"
He was 87. I had a feeling he'd been waiting a long time for his chance to shine.