I have been a little busy for a few weeks and have not visited the blogosphere. I have a few minutes so I think I will make an entry. I think it is safe to say that after my last few entries, I am very comfortable with admitting I am bisexual, maybe even accepting that I am closer to gay than bi. The part of me that I have not blogged about much is my love for female underwear, especially lingerie.

Through an adult website, I met a guy, lets call him Joe, but in this story, I will call him Joanne. He admitted to me how much he loved wearing panties and lingerie, and we just hit it off really well. Neither of us felt the need to try and pass as female, but we just loved how the lace and silk felt against our skin, especially our shaved genitals.

Before long, we both really wanted a play date. Dale and I were getting along well, and as I did on occasion, I went to our vacation home on the coast alone to be able to go fishing, Dale never cared for fishing, and still doesn't. I invited Joanne over. When he arrived, he was wearing sweat pants, and a t-shirt, but I could tell that was a cover. When he came into my home, he immediately pulled off the sweats and shirt, revealing a sexy little teddy underneath and black stockings. He put on a pair of heels and then walked over to me.... I was wearing my nighty and stocking, but was covering up with a robe so I too could go outside without detection. Joanne untied the sash on my robe, and pushed it off of my shoulders and I let it fall to the floor.

He obviously liked how I looked, he grabbed my growing cock inside my panties and I almost immediately wanted to cum. But I held it and guided Joanne to the couch. We sat down and as I had with others, I put on some trans porn for us to watch while we gave each other soft hand jobs. Neither of us wanting to cum just yet. I can be a bit impatient at times, especially when I am hungry, and see something I really want, so I just went for it. I took him into my mouth and began to fellate him. Joanne liked my technique and he just leaned back and let me have my fun.

In what seemed about 20 minutes of steady head, i felt his balls began to draw up. I knew he was about to give me my reward, so I pulled my head upwards to place the head of his cock just inside my lips, this would allow me to really work the tip with my tongue and also to get the full effect of his blasts. Then there it was, liftoff..... His milky seed pumping into my mouth, across my tongue and me quickly gulping so I wouldn't lose a drop.

I must admit, I am really becoming a cum slut. I could make meals out of it. We stopped playing for a little while, Joanne wanted to catch his breath, and I was ok with that as long as I could keep watching the trans porn and slowing stroking. It only took him about 3 minutes or so before he wanted to suck me. He got on his knees on the floor and scooted my ass out towards the edge of the couch. He went down on me with a passion. I honestly cannot remember any woman ever giving me that kind of energetic, athletic type of blow job in my life. He was working my cock so hard, so fast, that I knew I would not last long. I told him I was about to cum, and he stopped for a moment, allowing my cock to come out of his mouth as he looked up at me, and just at that moment, I shot my first eruption. Seeing it was too late to stop me, he rammed my cock back into his mouth and handled the rest of my load without losing any. He then licked the trail of cum up my belly that was from the first explosion. Cleaning up the mess that I had made.

We had had our girl moments. We still to this day talk a lot, but as of this writing, have just not been able to get back together for play. He works an odd schedule, and between that and his family life, the logistics just have not lined back up. But I still remember that night. I had played dressed with guys before, but not both of us dressed. I do hope that Joanne and I can have some girl time again.

When I agreed to go to Eddie's apartment just 2 weeks prior, I never really thought I would enjoy myself as much as I did. However, it turned out to be one of the best, and most rememberable sexual experiences of my life, and that remains so to this day. He and I made a connection that I never had with other lovers in my adult life. But now, just a little over 2 weeks later, Eddie was going to be returning to his home in Texas. He and I both knew we wanted another afternoon, so we once again planned to meet at his apartment on the day before he was leaving. Call it fate, I dont care, but it rained that day. Golf with my dad was out of the question. I lay around that morning, and finally texted Eddie, he said to just come on over.

So, what was to be an afternoon of homosexual fun, turned into an all day affair. I arrived at his house and we immediately began to undress. I fell down to my knees and just took his already erect cock into my mouth while he stood there. He reached down and placed his hands on the back of my head and for it was absolutely hot. I immediately felt like the little girl being made to deep throat, and it was making me so hot. Today, I was bound to have a lot of fun, so I went with it. I let him force me down to the base and again, no gag reflex was triggered. I let him pump my head up and down, in and out on his cock ,and my tongue would tease the underside of his balls, and head as he face fucked me.

Eddie was nearing an orgasm, I could tell, and he asked me if I wanted to stop, and I just hummed....nuhuh.....meaning HELL NO. I kept taking his cock until I felt what I had missed the first time.....his splooge spray painting the back of my throat. I gulped and gulped, determined to swallow every drop. I love that feeling. It is a feeling of accomplishment to me. I know I made him cum, and that made me feel wonderful.

Eddie collapsed onto the couch, I would let him catch his breath while I sat down beside him and began to slow stroke my hard cock. In a few minutes, Eddie would recover from his climactic coma, and he would take over stroking my dick. His hands knew how to make me feel good. He had me so hard and ready that I knew the minute he kissed it, I would bust. And that is what happened, he moved to go down on me, and he didnt have it in his mouth more than. 30 seconds and I was shooting ropes of cum into his hot, wet mouth. Like me, Eddie was not letting any of my jiz go to waste. He slurped down my juice with expert efficiency and now, within a timespan of just 15 minutes, he and I both had blown loads into each other's thirsty throats.

We poured ourselves a cup of coffee, and we sat down on the couch, both still naked, and enjoyed our coffee. Both well satisfied, but knowing we wanted more, as it was barely noon. Eddie booted up his computer and paired it to his TV set, then started up some hot trans porn for me again. He knew if anythign would get me going, it would be hot trannys. After about 30 minutes, I was getting a nice erection again, so Eddie knew we were ready to go for round 2.

So he laid me down onto the couch, and he began to massage me. His hands kneaded my legs and chest muscles. He gave me a rub down and in itself, was not a bit sexual, but what my skin was feeling under his touch, I could not hold back the sexual desire. He then pulled out a vibrator. It was an anal vibe, with a very slender tip but a larger base. He asked could he play with my ass. I said yes and he lubed it up, and began to tease my rectum. He then began to penetrate me with the toy, and it was feeling amazing. I have always loved anal stimulation, but never really wanted to bottom. Eddie knew this as we had shared our thoughts on everything sexual over the past few months. So he settled for just toy fucking me, and it was amazing. After about 20 minutes of him alternating between fucking my ass with the vibrator, and sucking my cock, I wanted to play a little myself.

I asked him to lay on his stomach, and I cleaned the vibe with an alcohol wipe, re-lubricated it, and in trying to duplicate what he had done to me, I teased his asshole, and then began to pump it into his man-pussy. I would eventually ask him to lay onto his back, and I got over him in a 69 position. I began to suck his beautifully hard cock and at the same time, fuck his tight asshole. Eddie was getting into it as he was bucking into my mouth with his cock, while also pushing himself back onto the toy that was fucking his ass. I cannot estimate the time here, it was blissful as time stood still, but in a few moments, I felt that familiar sensation of hot liquid being introduced to the back of my tongue and my throat. Eddie as cumming again....this is my reward for doing it right.

Eddie once again caught his breath, and after he went back down on my cock again. But after about 10 minutes of vigorous head, he asked me something that I will not forget as long as I can keep my faculties. He asked me to fuck him. I had never topped and he had never bottomed, but he wanted it. Neither of us had a condom, but we also knew with 100% certainty that we were both disease free. Eddie faced the couch, his feet on the floor, he was bent over and his hands on the couch. I stepped up behind him and I spread his ass cheeks and I gave him a quick rimming, just to slick him up with my saliva. I then applied a generous amount of lube to my cock as well as his rectal opening.

I positioned myself standing behind him, and I placed my cock head on the opening. I pushed in, and I was so surprised at how easily it went in. He was ready, and dammmmmmmmnnnnnnnn It felt so good. I began to pump into him and he began matching my movements. Again, time stood still. I have no idea how long I lasted, but he asked me to not cum in his ass, that he wanted me to cum in his mouth again. So as I neared orgasm, I pulled out and Eddie spun around. He took me into his mouth.....my cock fresh out of his rectum......nasty....but so hot. He took it and sucked the cum out of my balls, up my shaft, and into his mouth.

That was it......that was the only time in my life that I have fucked a man, and it was also the last time I would get to cum with Eddie. We got dressed, said goodbye, and I went home to my wife. He left the next day, and we have not even as much as texted since, not sure why, maybe just because we knew we cant play, so may as well not xxxxxxxxxxx ourselves. But in any event. I was able to say bye to Eddie in a very rememberable fashion.

During the summer of 2015, I was a member of a site that catered to gay and bisexual men. I had been talking with a guy named Eddie for awhile, we were just a lot alike. He was married and on the DL, as was I. He was sexually frustrated due to lack of intimacy with his wife as of late. But a little different than I, he was in my town only for work, and would be leaving in a few weeks. His work had him put up in a small apartment, sparsely furnished, but still very private. That allowed him to do what most married men cannot do, he could host.

My dad and I were playing golf on this day, but I was texting with Eddie. He said he would be off work early that day, and that he would like for me to come see him after I got off the golf course. Now I live in south Mississippi, this was summer. I was going to be hot and sweaty when I got off the golf course, but I agreed to come to his apartment if he would allow me to shower, which he of course did. I arrived at his door shortly after 2:00 pm in the afternoon, and it was a tad awkward at first, but in an exciting way.

Eddie showed me where the bathroom was, and he asked could he watch me undress and shower? I was going to be totally nude with this guy in a few minutes, so I didn't see any reason why he couldn't watch me shower. He had a glass door on his shower, and I could see through the glass, that he had undressed and was laying on his bed, slow stroking his cock. With the glass shower door fogged up by the steam, I could still tell that Eddie had a nice dick. It was not too long, probably about 5-1/2", and it was not too think either, maybe 1-1/2" in diameter. As I stepped out of the shower, Eddie came to me with a towel and dried my back, and allowed me to dry the rest of my body.

When I was dry, Eddie took my hand and led me to his living room. He had set up a computer, and had it loaded with trans porn, he knew that was my favorite. We sat and watched it together for about 20 minutes, with both of us stroking ourselves. I had seen all I could, I had to touch him. I reached over and took his perfect cock into my hand, and I stroked him up and down, while with my other hand I caressed his balls. Unlike my last attempt at m2m fun, Eddie was rock hard, his cock was standing fully erect. Eddie was into me and anyone could see that. This in turn made me really into him. I stopped and went to my clothes laying on the floor, and pulled out a bottle of strawberry flavored lube. I came back to my lover and dripped a generous amount all over his cock.

I then rubbed the lube all over the length of his shaft, getting him nice and oily, and then I took him into my mouth. I was like a cock starved whore. I sucked him agressively, and the full length. If I had a gag reflex, it wasn't being stimulated as I going all the way to the his pubic bone with my upper lip, and I could slip my tongue out of my mouth and lick his scrotum, all while the head was in the back of my throat.

Eddie wanted to suck me, so he asked me to stop and he took my lube and coated my cock as I had his earlier. He went down on me and good lord, it felt amazing. You could tell that I was not Eddie's first friend he had blown, he knew exactly how to suck a dick and he was really sending me into ecstasy. As I was getting close, I asked him to let me finish him first. We had many conversations prior to this day, wherein I knew that he could cum multiple times, whereas I , if I came, I would lose interest in sexual activity for a little while. Eddie knew this as well, so he agreed.

He lay back onto his couch ,and I again coated his dick with the strawberry lube. I returned to aggressively sucking his cock. I have always been an attentive lover, I can normally tell when a man (or woman) is about to orgasm, just by their body language. He was beginning to tense up and I could hear his light moans become more audible and guttural. If any of you had read my blogs before, you know that I love to swallow semen. But for some reason, this day.... I wanted to actually be able to see his cock shoot his load.

So as I thought he was about to blast off, I took my mouth off of his cock and started stroking him hard and fast. He quickly shot all over his toned abdomen. It was a violent eruption, but not a whole lot of volume, but still a nice load. I immediately went to licking his belly, cleaning up the mess I had helped make. That was when Eddie asked me to lay back and he wanted his turn. It would not take long, as I am quite frankly I didn't spontaneously cum with him as this whole experience had me over the top aroused.

Eddie once again, expertly gave me some of the best head I had ever had. I told him that if he didn't want to swallow, he would need to stop soon and finish me as I had him, but that made him work my cock even faster and harder. I could then feel him literally sucking hard, and that was damn near a vacuum of my cock. I arched my back and the blasts were coming out in ropes. With Eddie's suction on my cock, I could feel him pulling the cum from the base of my cock all the way up the urethra. He never once stopped, and not one drop of my jiz escaped his mouth.

We lay there for a little while, talking, something I had not really done with any of my female lovers, but I honestly didn't want to leave. Eddie had made me have an amazing afternoon. Something I had not experienced in quite awhile. I finally got up and got dressed, it was nearing 5:00 in the afternoon and my wife would be coming home soon. I would need to get on to the house.

The next day, I messaged Eddie, and we both agreed it was a lot of fun and would like to meet again as he would be leaving back for Texas in a few weeks. I had to go to work myself and when I got back home, he only had 2 more days before he would be gone. We planned to meet the next afternoon, but I will save that story for another entry. But for now, just know that with Eddie, he had made me start having sexual fun again. He reminded me of how I felt years ago with Pete, Christian, and Ted, when it was fun to be with a lover, no matter if they were same sex as you or not.

Spring of 2014, Dale and I had gotten to a point where we may have sex every 2 months or so. I was full of sexual tension and I needed to find a release soon. Human beings are meant to interact with other humans, me handling my frustrations by masturbation was not going to work for much longer. Now as I have said, I was a member of several pay sites. I had gotten to chatting with a guy that lived about 30 miles from me. At first it was all very hetero chat, however it took a turn towards bisexuality. He and I had always admitted to being curious, but we never had acted as if we would act on those curiosities. But then when we did start talking about it, we both knew we had to at least try.

I honestly cannot even remember his name, but for the sake of this blog, I will call him Bob. Now Bob was around 15 years older than me and he had admitted to me about suffering from some ED issues. But he wanted to try to play anyway. One day it was raining, so playing golf was out. I knew that if I sat at home, I would end up masturbating all day. But I got online anyway, and sure enough in the chatroom was Bob. I dont know guys.....it just felt right. I asked him if he would be interested in meeting me at a motel just about half way between where I live, and where he lives. He agreed, so I drove to the Motel and got a room. This was an old type Motel, still had keys, and they would accept cash. I texted Bob and told him what the room number was, and in about 20 minutes, he knocked on the door.

He came into the room, and I knew that if I didn't just jump in and start, I would back out and leave. So I just pulled my pants down and Bob did the same. We immediately began touching each other's cocks. Bob was really small, but completely flacid, so I thought it would get much bigger. He asked me to lay on the bed, and when I did he took me into his mouth. It felt so good to finally have a wet mouth on my cock again, I was enjoying it way more than I should, seeing as how I had been pretty much heterosexual for the past 16 years. I didn't want to cum before I had a turn to suck.

So I asked him to stop and I got him to lay on the bed. I began to suck Bob's cock, and I just knew how much I had missed this part of my life. However, Bob's ED would play a big part in this encounter. He got hard for about 30 seconds, but then went back completely limp. No matter how I licked, sucked, or kissed on it, he just would not get an erection. Now...... as this is my first time sucking cock since 1998, Bob not getting hard bothered me. He had adequately warned me that this could happen, but still, when it happens it seriously damaged my mood about the afternoon delight we were trying to have.

Well Bob must have been able to sense my frustration with it, so he just told me to stop, and to lay back and let him get me off.....Now I was all about having a fun time, but at that moment, I wasn't feeling well about how it was going, I wanted to cum and get the fuck out of there. So I laid back and Bob went back down on my cock. After a few minutes, I just knew that I was not going to cum. The mood was just shot. So I asked him to stop, and we just got dressed.

My return to being a faggot was not going well. But I would not give up

In 2001, I reconnected with a female fuck buddy from my younger days of a bar hopping, early twenties guy. Her name is Dale, she was a very lovely woman and we timing seemed perfect. We got engaged, and eventually married in 2002, and we remain married to this day. In our early years, we had some very.........how to say this..... Athletic sex, seems about right. While it was very good sex, there was nothing kinky, freaky, or even fresh about it. I love her, I know that to be 100% true, but our sex life was just not very challenging. The older I get, the more I want my sex life to be adventurous. I want my boundaries pushed. After Angela, I thought I was ready to kind of tone it down a little, but after about 5 years with Dale, I realized that I needed what Angela provided. Someone that would find my limits, and make me go past them. To do the uncomfortable things so I can realize the fun and exhilaration that can be felt by exploring the taboo.

Before Dale and I were married, she had a hysterectomy due to female problems. It was a partial so she would not have to take hormones, but the doctor warned that early onset menopause may be a side effect. But like I said, early on we had a very vibrant and active sex life, so we kind of pushed that possibility out of our minds.. However, around 2009, the frequency began to dwindle. It was slow at first, but after a few months, it was noticeable. I spoke with her about it, and she said she just didn't have the sex drive she did just a year before. By mid 2010, we were down to about 2 times a month, and if I can call it vanilla, it would be a generous adjective. A few minutes of mutual oral, missionary intercourse, and then sleep. The whole act would be about 10 minutes, start to finish. It got to a point where I actually tried to cum quickly, just so it would be over. My sex life was in a rut, that much is clearly obvious.

By early 2011, Dale had gotten the official diagnosis. She was definitely in menopause. I had done some extensive reading on menopause, because lets face it, I am a guy and I cannot understand the female system like a doctor, or other females can. I had read many a promising story of women exiting menopause that became hyper-sexual. So I was holding out hope that would be the case with Dale. By 2013 though, it was evident that was not going to happen. Our sex life had gotten down to about 1 time every 3 months, and I swear she was only doing that out of a feeling of obligation.

I fell back into a place where I would spend most of my days watching porn online, and jerking off. Fantasizing about sex with beautiful cam models, or even just frustrated housewives that wanted a little more. Then, very subtly at first, I began to watch more trans, and gay porn. I still watched plenty of what would be considered hetero porn, but I realized I no longer skipped over the videos or pictures showing male to male sexual acts. I was on a website at the time kind of like this one, where one could interact with other members, and it wasn't long until I had several friends that were close enough, that fun could be had, if we so decided.

I will stop here, as to contiinue would be another very long entry. I just felt that I had to tell the story as to what got me back to a place where I would actually step outside of my marriage. My story is not unique in that regard, and some women and men for that matter, may judge me still. Saying I should still honor the wedding vows, and believe me, I do feel guilty about it. But I am still a very sexual man, and I honestly think she knows I am no longer faithful. But my infidelity is only in the intimacy department. In every other aspect of our lives, we are inseparable. We are just in a place of Dont Ask - Dont Tell. She wont ask me if I am fooling around, and I wont volunteer that information. We have a small, summer home on our coast, where I go to fish. We do not know many people in that town as we keep to ourselves. I can safely play there, and it would not be throwing it into Dale's face, and never in her bed.

So I fall head over heels in love with Janet. She is my first piece of pussy, so that happens to most guys. And as I said, she and i dated until right before she graduated high school. I would mope and cry, and pine for her most of that summer, but eventually I would meet other girls and move on with my life. I have also since made contact with Janet using facebook. We had some good talks, but nothing sexual came out of it.

Many years would pass, and I would be basically living my life as a hetero male. I even got married and had a daughter. However that marriage was doomed from the start, and that divorce period of my life kind of sent me into a dark place. I knew I was missing something, but I have to be honest, I didn't know what it would be.

I am going to fast forward many years, all the way to 1998. I started seeing a lady, lets call her Angela. this woman was as outgoing sexually as any woman I have ever met. Very open to kink and fetishes. She and I would get into watching a lot of porn together. It was the age of the internet, and porn sites non unlike this one were all over. I came in from out in the yard one day and found Angela looking at shemale or trans porn. She said she wanted to dress me up like a little sissy slut..... those were almost her exact words.

This caught me so off guard, but I honestly would have done anything for Angela. She challenged me so much, and i found it to be very sexually liberating. I agreed so she got some of her panties and lingerie, and we spent the rest of that day with me modeling different female boudoir attire, and it culminated in she and I having some of the hottest sex of our relationship. As we lay in bed, spent from our love making, she said she would like to bring in a guy, and she would want me to suck his cock.

She had no idea about my early life, so I had to at least act shocked. She went on, she said I would be required to dress en-femme. Now as I said, I would do anything for Angela, and as you know from my earlier writings, I used to love to suck cock. So of course, I feigned reluctancy, but agreed. Just three days later, I came home from playing golf, and she told me we would have company that night and she had laid out an outfit for me on the bed. When I went into the bedroom, it was a red nighty and garter belt, red hose, and some boudoir slippers. She told me to get a shower so I did. When i got out of the shower, she wanted me to sit on the bed and she polished my toenails. She didn't have a wig for me but she did do some light makeup and made me look very femboy.

An hour later, a guy showed up, and quite frankly I cannot remember his name.....it wasn't even about him, and to be completely honest, It wasn't even about Angela. She ordered him to pull off his pants, and sit on the edge of the bed. Then she ordered me to suck him off. I got on my knees, and crawled between his legs. I took his massive cock into my mouth and began blowing him. It was the first cock I had had in my mouth in over a decade......aboug 13 years to be exact. Now later I would learn that he was a gay prostitute that Angela had found, but on that day I just thought he as a regular guy she had found that was bisexual. Took about 20 minutes, but he eventually began that little dance, where he was tensing up and breathing heavily. I knew he was about to bust, and right on cue, he spray painted the back of my throat with hot man-goo. I swallowed him all.....not spilling one drop.

As I allowed his cock to slide out of my mouth, I looked over at Angela and she was finger fucking her cunt. She was so hot over what me and this strange man had done that she was in the throes of a huge orgasm herself. We soon sent the boy away, and she and I would fuck until the early morning hours. Until this day, that was the most intense sexual experience of my life, and it was the only time I had another person in the bedroom with me, although it was just 2 of us having oral sex.

Angela and I would burn hot, but we would burn fast. Only lasting another 6 months. But she had awoken a couple things inside me. I now knew I loved wearing ladies undergarments, and I was very much a bisexual man.

My buddy Ted and I would become pretty much boyfriends. We would do just about everything together, but would also love each other too. Not too many days would go by without he and I sucking each others cocks. it was most definitely our favorite thing to do, and to this day, Ted is the longest male relationship I ever had. We were together for roughly 6 months and I had just turned 16 years old. When I would get home, he would usually already be there, so I would usaully walk over to his house. That after school time was our best since our parents were never home by that time, and his sister always had softball practice and wouldn't be there either.

Well this day we went back to his room and it wasn't long until he and I were naked. I still just could not believe how large Ted's cock was. He was a good 2 inches longer than me, and could cum fucking rivers. On this particular day, I was layed back and Ted was down sucking on me, when all of a sudden his door flew open and in walked none other than JANET, his sister. To her credit, she immediately said "shit" and swiftly turned around out of the room. But the damage was done. Ted was mortified, and so was I. I got dressed and I went home. I just knew she would tell on us.

The next day, I just didn't go over there. I was certain Ted would feel like me and we better at the least lay low for awhile. Now what I am about to tell you is the shit you would read straight out of Penthouse Forum, but I swear its the truth. There was a knock on my door and I opened it, there stood Janet. She looked at me and asked could she come in. I reluctantly allowed it, I mean she had all the leverage, I couldn't make her mad. She came in the house and she started talking, and what was coming out of her mouth was not what I expected.

She asked me if I knew that what Ted and I had been doing was wrong? I said I guess so, so she proceeded to tell me that it was ok, that she could help me fix it. She asked me to sit down on the couch and she pulled my pants down. She then stripped right in front of me.....Now if I told you how many times I had fantasized about seeing her naked, I could not put a number on it. She was the hot, older sister of my best friend and lover. I had wanted her since I met her. But here she was, butt naked in front of me. This is early 1985 and shaving pussy was not the norm back then, she had this gorgeous, perfectly full black bush of pubic hair.

she could see that what she was doing had the desired effect on me as my cock was standing straight the fuck up. She got me to lay back and she got on top of me, straddling me. She then guided my dick into her wet pussy.....completely bareback. No condom.....so i asked about it, she said she was on the pill and there was not danger of getting pregnant as she had just finished her period 2 days prior. So my fears were alleved somewhat even though I had no idea about what the proper time of month would have been.

AS my dick slid into her, I immediately came into her. I mean, not even one full pump, but I am counting it, that was my first time, I was no longer a virgin. Janet laughed at me, but said she had expected it.....She told me to lay perfectly still and she began to just grind onto my dick, which to my surprise was still pretty hard. With my jiz to serve as extra lubricant, she began to rise up and down, and it was making me so hard all over again. Now not having very much experience, I would not be able to stand it too much longer, and again I orgasmed inside her tight little 17 year old cunt.

This time, she raised up off of me, and went to my bathroom to clean up a little. When she came back, I was sitting there, still naked. She walked over to me and sat down with me, and started kissing my neck and then my lips. She said that I should never do that with boys again, and she would help me make sure of it.

So yes....I know yall are all saying that just doesn't sound right, that is the stuff of fairy tales, but I swear that is how I would begin my lie. Janet and I would date the rest of that year (My sophomore year of high school, her junior), and all of the next school year. We would break up the week before her graduation. She was going off to Tuscaloosa to attend the UofA, and she wanted some freedom. I understood, but it broke my heart. So while I was now into the lie, I stil cared for her.... And as for Ted, he was so embarrassed by being caught, that he never brought it up again. He too started dating girls, and we just let that side of us slip into memory.

Well, If you have read all my other entries, you know that I have started a sexual awakening in my life, started somewhat young, and as of the last chapter, still quite inexperienced. I knew I liked girls, as I really loved looking at nudie magazines at naked women, my dick would get so hard and I could cum fairly quickly when jerking off to women. I never really ever jerked off thinking about boys or men, however until now, I had not had any sexual experience that was not with male friends. That would change soon enough, but for now I still have a gap that has to be bridged.

Our 2nd year of living in Alabama, we moved into a new subdivision and my neighbor across the street from me was a boy named Ted. He and I were exactly the same age, but he went to public school and I to private, so we didn't go to the same school, but we did hang out in the neighborhood a lot. We skate boarded, played baseball, and explored the woods that surrounded the subdivision. We are both 15 and of course we would always talk like a bunch of teenage boys, like we were studs in the making. But one day we were out in the woods in a little fort we had made, and Ted asked me if I had ever had sex with a girl yet? I was kind of nervous to answer him, but I did, I told him that I had not.....not with a girl at least.

I had kind of expected him to act all weirded out when I said that, but instead he acted like it really piqued his interest. He then asked "with a boy?" to which I answered that not exactly either. He then just looked really confused, but I said I had jerked off with a couple of my guy friends, and that had kind of led to a little bit of light oral sex. That is when Ted surprised the shit out of me, he reached over and unzipped my shorts and pulled my dick out, and since our conversation was sexual in nature, like all 15 years olds, my dick was getting very hard. He asked how should he do it.....I could tell he wanted to, but he didn't want to do it wrong. So I just said, take it into your mouth, just make sure you dont get any teeth involved. Just lick, and suck, and go up and down with your head. Before he would do it, he asked would I do it to him after, and I said yes.

Ted took my member into his mouth and it wasn't long until I could feel I was nearing an orgasm, so I asked him to stop. I asked him to drop his pants and to my surprise, Ted had a pretty large penis for our age, at least 7 inches long. I took him into my mouth and could not get to the base, he was just too long, but in just under 2 minutes time, he busted into my mouth. His cum was the first I had tasted, that wasn't my own, since Pete in August of 1980. Ted's jism had a sweet taste that neither mine, nor Pete's had. Again, it isn't really a taste as more of a hint, a sensation of sweetness mixed with salt. He finished in my mouth and asked could he finish me off as well. He wanted to taste it, so I knew I could cum pretty quickly as I was just seconds from doing it before, so he took my cock into his mojth and within a few seconds, I was shooting ropes into his mouth. I was soon just absolutely spent

Ted let my cock fall out of his mouth, and that is when he did something, that I have not done too many times. He came up to me, and we kissed. We french kissed, it was my first time to do that, and I could taste my cum on his tongue. I dont kiss many men, but i did enjoy kissing Ted. After about 20 minutes of just talking, we both agreed that this would be our secret, but that we would both like to do it some more soon. We went back down out of the woods to his house. His big sister Janet, (Big by 1 year - she was 16) met us in the yard, wanted to know where in the hell we had ran off too? He and I both jjust looked at each other and smiled, said we had been playing football in the neighborhood on the other side of the woods. She sure as shit didn't need to know what the truth was.........but she would.

Let's fast forward almost 2 years. It is the spring (March/April-ISH) of 1982, and I am in the 7th grade. I had just turned 13 in February and had actually began puberty about 3 months prior to my 13th birthday. That was a fun night.....discovering I had actually began transforming into being a man (At least anatomically and physiologically). I was doing what I had done almost daily since my summer with Pete.....beating my meat. I knew I was getting close to puberty as I had began seeing a few little black hairs sprouting around my dick. Anyway, I was playing with myself, but this time when I climaxed, I made a mess. That was it, my first time to ejaculate. I ate it all, I had swallowed Pete when we played, so I knew I wanted to taste mine. It is something I still do to this day.

I digress, so back to the actual story. My family had moved to Alabama the year before and I made friends relatively easy. My best friend was a boy named Anthony, and Anthony had a younger brother named Christian that was just a little over 1 year younger than Anthony. So, during that spring, I was 13, but Christian was only 11, but would be 12 in June. I was spending a saturday night with my friend Anthony, and after a full day of just boys being boys, Anthony was tired and wanted to go to bed early, but myself and Christian wanted to sit up and watch Saturday Night LIve. After SNL ended, we went to his room where he wanted to show me his hidden nudie magazines.

After a few minutes of looking at some sexual contraband (Hustler and Penthouse magazines), he and I both had erections. So, almost 2 years later, I was now the master, and I knew the script to this movie. I asked Christian if he had ever jerked off before? And like me just 2 years prior, he had no idea what I was talking about. So I said I could show him and I pulled out my dick. I began to stroke it up and down and I encouraged Christian to do the same. Also like me, he realized it was feeling great, and I could tell he was really getting into it, so I decided I wanted to take a chance. I asked him if he would like a blowjob?

I knew if he didn't know what jerking off was that he would have ZERO clue as to what a blowjob was, however I did think that he would trust me......and he did. I said I could show him but we would have to keep it secret. He agreed, and I shifted over to place my head over his little dick, and I took him into my mouth. In about 20 seconds, he reached that magical moment of climax. Again, Just like me 2 years earlier, he couldn't ejaculate, but the feeling was still the same with our without the juice. He bucked back and forth and was convulsing with pleasure. I stopped blowing him, and asked him if he would give my dick a kiss as well. He was a bit reluctant, but since I had done what I did for him, he agreed. I told him he wouldn't have to do it long.

After a few minutes of him sucking me, I told him to stop and I would show him something pretty cool. So I jerked myself off to completion, and when I shot my boy-goo all out onto my stomach, Christian's eyes became the size of saucers. He said wow.....what is that? I then explained about ejaculation and that he too would have it soon.

Now Christian and I had a secret, one that we have kept to this day. He and I would jerk off together every time I would spend the weekend with his family for around a year, and one of the best memories I have is that I was watching him when had his first orgasm with cum spurting out. I never blew him again, but I wanted to taste his cum that night, however I didn't do it. He is married now with 2 grown daughters and even 1 grandchild. We still talk from time to time, but again, Our childhood SEXperimentations are not a topic of discussion.

So as you can see, I had came full circle. I was once the student, but now I was the teacher. My next installment will once again show a progression for me in my sexual journey, one that would eventually lead to me living the lie.

So, in the other two parts to the story, I told of my childhood friend, Pete, teaching me a little bit about my body. He showed me how to masturbate, but he also showed me the amazing feeling of fellatio. I was only 11 years old, and that may seem young to some, but nonetheless, it was a very fun summer. Pete and I would continue with our daily trips to the swim hole. It was not only very secluded, but we could also cool off on those south Mississippi, 100 degree, summer days.

Pete could ejaculate, and so I also learned how to actually taste it, when he let a good stream of it go onto the tip of my tongue. This made it where the semen had to go across all of my taste buds. Now this part may seem very odd to some of you, but I actually dont mind the taste. I Know some women dont like it, and a lot of it depends on the man's diet, but for the most part, there isn't a bad taste, its just.......I cant describe it with words, but its just cum. But for the most part, I really like to swallow it because I think it shows a level of intimacy with my lover. It lets them know I love them, and want to taste their seed.

Well, it wasn't long until August came and I would have to return to my parents home in another city. Pete and I would stay in touch by phone, but it got less and less. One thing I did not mention is that summer would be my last at that particular summer home, as my grandparents were building a home a few miles away. Same city, but totally different neighborhood. So, I really didn't realize it at the time, but it would be the last summer that I would ever get to hang out with Pete. But, as I said, we spoke a good bit on the phone, but really never got to hang out.

So what I am saying is that at the end of that summer, Pete and I would never share each other's touch again. A few years later though, I ran into him at a local football game. He and I talked at great length, we "hinted" about our activities, but not like we were going to go behind the gym at that school and have sex. We just basically talked about how it was still our secret. Now this was quite a few years after our time, and I was 17 at the time and had began dating girls, when he found that part out, he let me know that he was gay. He had not came out publicly about it, but that he had always knew he was gay. Therefore the things we did, it was just how he felt. He wanted boys (Or men at that time). As we parted ways that time, I promised I would always keep his secret, but that I would need him to promise to do the same for me. I was pretty sure I would be looked at badly if it had gotten out.

Now Pete was not my last boyfriend of my youth, so in my next part of the story, I will tell my tale of passing on what I was taught by Pete. However before I moved into that portion of my journey, I felt I had to first close the chapter on Pete. I have not seen him since that night at the football game. I have often wondered if he ever came out, or found love, or as morbid as this may sound, if he is even still living as so many my age are now passing on. But one thing is for sure, he was my first sexual lover. He was gentle, and he taught me so much about my body and how to make it feel good.