michael1's blog post

Friday, January 19, 2007, 11:06:59 PM
Advertisements and such
I am assured that these are genuine!

Dogs
Lost: Small apricot poodle - Reward. Neutered, just like one of the family.
Dog For Sale: Great Dames.
Dog For Sale: Eats anything; especially fond of children.

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From the Kitchen
A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
7 ounces of choice sirloin steak, boiled to your likeness and smothered with golden fried onion rings.
Dinner Special - Chicken or Beef $2.25; Turkey $2.35; Children $2.00

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Antiques
For sale: An antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
For sale: Four-posted bed, 101 years old, perfect for antique lover.

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Vacation
Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities.

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Wanted
Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.
Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
Wanted: Part-time marred girls for soda fountain in sandwich shop.
Wanted: Chambermaid in rectory. Love in, 200 a month; References required.
Wanted: Girl to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Salary and Blue Cross.
Wanted: Mother's helper, peasant working conditions.
Wanted: Widower with school-age children requires a person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.
Wanted: 3-year-old teacher needed for preschool; Experience preferred.
Wanted: Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.

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Services
Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals and smacks included.
Ears pierced - while you wait!
Save regularly in our bank. You'll never reget it.
We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.

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Miscellaneous
Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home too.
Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
Offer expires December 31 or while supplies last.
Stock up and save. Limit: one per customer
See ladies blouses. 50% off!
Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else.
Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops!
Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!
Christmas tag-sale. Hand made gifts for the hard-to-find person.
Modular Sofas. Only $299 For rest or fore play
Auto Repair Service. Free pickup and delivery. Try us once, and you'll never go anywhere again.
Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
And now, the Superstore - unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in you home for $1.

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Radio Spots
Ladies and gentlemen, now you can have a bikini for a ridiculous figure.
When you are thirsty, try 7-Up, the refreshing drink in the green bottle with the big 7 on it and the u-p after.
Tune in next week for another series of classical music programs from the Canadian Broadcorping Castration.
Illiterate? Write for free information.
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happy friday!!! have an awesome weekend!!

Comments

Others Have Said: 
da toy on 19-Jan-07 23:45:02
pmsl oh too many funny ones to list hahahaha. needed that

teacher4051 on 20-Jan-07 0:59:21
don't know where you get them from m8 - but i hope the supply never dries up

dw'spassionangel on 20-Jan-07 3:28:47
hi sweetie!!!!!!!! keep them coming hun, lmao...xoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxo love,hugs and kisses

just_looking123 on 20-Jan-07 7:48:31
lol!!!