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michaelthe1's blog post - thoughts of the day
| Sunday, January 26, 2014, 4:42:37 PM |
be careful in warm weather if some1 comes 2 ur door n saids they are checking for ticks n asks u to take ur clothes off n dance naked with ur arms up lol this is funny im the man of the house so starting tomorrow when I come home I want a hot meal ready the sec. I walk thru the door afterwords while im watching espn u bring my slippers n run me a hot bath then guess who is going 2 dress me n comb my hair ? so she replies the funeral director thoughts from a silent actor Charles chaplin We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other's happiness, not by each other's misery. Words are cheap. The biggest thing you can say is 'elephant'. To help a friend in need is easy, but to give them your time is not always opportune. We think too much and feel too little. Nothing is permanent in this world - not even our troubles a meaning n life thought from a close friend The meaning of life is... in the end only three things matter: How much you loved, how gently you lived and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. hugs my friend Thoughts for 2007 Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted. Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky...not really good for anything, but you s till can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs. Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in a hospitals dying of nothing. Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut ;saves you thirty cents? Number 2 - In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it look normal. AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2007 - We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration. Top 10 Things That People In Front Of You In Checkout Lines Say -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. "Wait! I have a coupon somewhere at the bottom of my purse." 2. "Oh damn! I left my cheque book out in the car." 3. "Isn't that funny? None of the things I picked up had prices on them." 4. "You mean this brand isn't on sale? Ooops! Let me run and get the right kind." 5. "I demand to speak with the manager!" 6. "You have no idea how long I've been waiting to get rid of this sack of pennies." 7. "Hold on...my husband is bringing another cart cart...Where is he?... Hubert?!" 8. "Wait! Let me check that receipt-- all eight feet if it!" 9. "No. No. No. You've bagged these groceries all wrong. Let me show you the right way." 10. "Ooops! This 200-lb. bag of dog food has a hole in it. Here, you sweep the crumbles off the counter and I'll go see if I can carry another bag over ```````````` "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life," -- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign . ````````````````````````````````````````````````` "If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure." --Bill Clinton, President duhh ```````````````` "Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas." --Keppel Enderbery double duhh ```````````````` "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances." --Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina lol ```````````````````````````````````````````` "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record." --Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman oh my kindness thought of the day; the 1 thing that the whole world understands is music it is what we all have n common as lennon said imagine so lets end wars n hate thru music the cool thing here is people from all over the world sing a song not together but from their own country n nothing beats their smiles at the end have a great gday laugh love n live with passion |
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