Ok, since everyone seems to love this (absolutely true) story, I decided to add it here.
Once upon a time I shared living space with a cat named Jessica. When we got Jessica from the pound she was very small (the size of a 4-6 month old kitten) though she was several years old. She also had a case of round worms that was so severe that she appeared to be pregnant.
This, as one may expect, really messed up her digestive tract resulting in her having really foul smelling gas all the time (we actually nicknamed her "gas bag" for this reason). She was always very apologetic about this and tried very hard to keep herself clean.
And, so the stage was set for the day we had company over for southern butter beans and rice. For those of you who aren't aware, butter beans have a rather... expansive effect on the human intestines and in a very short period of time.
So, as we all sat around enjoying after dinner coffee and talking about the news of the day with Jessica nestled on the couch behind us, it came to pass that someone let a rather rank fart. As the smell wafted up to Jessica, the poor thing just assumed that she had caused it and looked up with an anguished look as if to say, "I'm sorry! I'm sooo sorry!" and then very suddenly began to lick her own butt, stopping every so often to once again to look up apologetically.
We were already trying to hold back the laughter in a rather thinly veiled attempt to be polite but Jessica's actions caused us to all burst into laughter. We laughed and laughed and began passing around the box of Kleenex -- there wasn't a dry eye in the house.
But, the story doesn't end there. My lovely daughter, wanting to be a part of the laughter, spent the next several months/years trying to recreate the scene by farting near the cat and waiting for the cat to lick its butt. I tell ya, I had the most difficult time trying to explain to her why it doesn't work if you hold the cat's head near your butt when you fart. |