Thanks for your positive comments and messages concerning my non-promotion. Life will definitely go on also without that - and in three days it is going to change for good anyway, and I think it is more than only my status which alters. Tomorrow is my Polterabend at Elsie's - I wonder what she is up to. On Friday in the late afternoon, the official ceremony will take place with the mayor at 5 p.m. our time. I tell this for all who have asked and want to keep their fingers crossed at the exact time, or wish to send me some mental energy over the seas. I am sure I will feel you - wherever you are. And you will give me strength. I wish I could invite you all to my wedding. You will be there in my mind.

At the staff-meeting yesterday in the late afternoon, his Eminence our Headmaster had two important announcements to make: First he publicly congratulated me on getting married at the weekend and wished me all the best. "After a tempestuous ride through the turbulent waters of her life as a single woman, she has arrived in calmer waters, steering into the safe haven of marriage", he said, and his smirk showed that he thought this was particularly funny.

And then he said that it was his special pleasure to announce the name of the new head of the language department - a very able woman who was coming from outside and could certainly bring in some new wind and new views. She had brilliant qualifications, had done a number of management courses and would also take over some English lessons. And she was single and very dedicated to her profession. And certainly our dear Alpina would help her find her ways around our school and support her in any way.

The old sod: it seems that he is pissed off because of my getting married. What were his fanatsies about my role on the up-to-now all male school board, for god's sake? That they would throw me over the headmaster's desk and gangbang be after the meeting? And that this was more likely to happen when I was single? It was not me who had asked for the job in the first place. After announcing this, there was an even broader smirk and his moon-face, and many more among my dear colleagues.

What a despicable asshole. My fantasy is certainy being called to his office by a secretary one day during a lesson and being told that he has just passed away at his desk. What an utterly sad and satisfying tableau: he lying spreadeagled over this spacious desk with his face all blue and bloated.

What is life, after all, but an unending series of victories and defeats?

It was such a good night with Phillp - if he is a god-sent musician, I am his instrument - he knows so well how to play me, how much to touch me in what place so that my vibrations are best. And so much beauty: his warm, firm body, his beautiful, proud cock. I held it long last night, and I sucked and sucked, and then drank from it, while he held me where I can feel him best: his thumb in my pussy and his index in my anus, he rubs his two fingers inside me and between there is only some thin sensitive tissue the touch of which makes me crazy. He holds me there and I am completely lost and there is nothing I will not do for him. Nothing. Nothing. Oh bliss without end. Oh heaven. May these two fingers guide me through life.



That is basically what I will look like: like Jezebel in a red dress. I don't want to wear white, and black is no colour for a wedding. So it has to be red. And as there is no custom here to have bridesmaids, it's not their colour, either. I will let Phillip decide what I am wearing under it.

"And soon you may be Mrs Phillip or do you say Frau Phillip? Here the days of women automaticaly changing their surname has gone. Many choose to, some hyphenate with their own, others retain the old for their professional life and a few never change. What will you do?" I was asked by one of my online friends. For me this has always been clear: I am going to keep my own name and add Phillip's with a hyphen for official use.

The reason why I am doing this might sound a little strange. I am the very last member of my family - with me, or even with my marriage, the name would disappear. Of course there are some other people in Austria with my name, but as far as I know none of them is related to me. There is even a chance that our children will have my name - if there are any. Sometimes I imagine having a son who will take over our family tradition and become a doctor like my father. But if he wants to become an actor, or a musician, or a nuclear physicist - why not? it is going to be a different time with other needs of which good old Granny Alpina will only understand little.

Although it's below freezing, I'll go to the market now. It's going to be a quiet weekend - the calm before the storm. Phillip and I will be alone tonight and make a pizza together in our stone oven. There is not much to plan anymore, everything should be fine for the morning of the 25th, when there will be our little reception. There will be about thirty people in our house, and around noon the catering service will provide some exquisite food. About ten guests are from Phillip's family, the rest are friends - also Elsie and Joerg will be there, and our neighbours Helene and Armin with little Oliver. Some colleagues of Phillip's and of mine, but not many. Angelika, of course. Ruth can't make it. Our official wedding will be next Friday, with the mayor of our little village for the legal ceremony. There will only be two witnesses with us - we have decided to find them in the street.

I hope I will spend a lot of time in Phillip's arms over the weekend - so that my panic can evaporate and my doubts, and, when I feel his wonderful cock enter me and touch my soul - maybe the tiny clouds of depression that have formed around me recently are blown away like nothing.

Yesterday was the last quiet Jacuzzi night with me as an unmarried woman; next Thursday we will do it in the form of a wedding-eve party, which is a tradition here. We call it Polterabend, and you see a certain closeness to the word Poltergeist - it is supposed to be a pretty unusual event. It's going to be an all women party (and the guys keep to the guys) and a more recent custom is for example to invite a male stripper and to let the bride do all kinds of funny manipulations which she won't do again in her later life. What it is going to be in my case, I don't know; Elsie is going to invite, and so I am just wondering what I am in for.

Yesterday it was very relaxing, but unerotic - if you do not find nakedness erotic in all situations, that is. I was filled in with the most recent developments concerning their "son" - who seems to be healty and well. For those who don't know: Kueken is a colleague of my friend Elsie's, who has no children of her own - they were quite close and she even lived im my friend's house for a time. Then Elsie's husband Joerg impregnated her and now she had a son whose father Joerg is, although Kueken lives with another guy by now who seems to be willing to adopt the child later.

The hope to have a child of their own is gone, and so is the illusion for Joerg to have a little harem, and it seems that he will not even have any access to the child, because legally he has no rights, particularly if Kueken does not wish so and there is an adoption. My friends are thinking of doing something for little Nico all the same: it seems they have decided to put a considerable sum of money into an account, to which he is entitled when it is needed for a later education or for studies. Together with the interest it will be a neat sum and enable him to be in a comfortable situation in 18 years.

So we were sitting in the warm water while it was below freezing. Now and then we could see some stars through the clouds. That was it.

If you have ever seen a pornographic film with a threesome, then you know what it can be like, but in reality it is quite different. A couple can lose themselves in vigorous sex, and this can also happen in a moresome, for example in a swingers club, where you can become really selfish and only enjoy - but in a threesome there is always some responsibility to take over. Only in films they never seem to do this, but it is maybe because you can see they are paid for the work they do.

A private threesome, which really takes place and is not only a pleasant contraption of the mind, is quite a tricky thing, that's at least my experience. There are first people's individual fantasies which are bound to collided with the fantasies of others, or with the invariable clumsiness of reality. A twosome has its own rules, a moresome is chaotic and finds its own ways, but a threesome needs a choreography: what does one do to each other so that everyone is happy and no-one left out or feeling exploited? I know what you think now: if the whole thing is so bloody complicated, why not just call it off?

I think we were finally close to what we wanted: Phillip fucked two women shortly after each other, cumming in both of them while he was being watched. This is what excites him - being watched by the woman who knows she is next, or by the one he has just pulled out of.

Helene got a lot of attention and compliments for her trim body, and she seemed quite over the moon when Phillip took her while she was sitting on the table spreading wide and I was stroking her hair holding her from hehind. She would have liked me to reclaim his cum from inside her, but as I mentioned yesterday - this was not possible. Instead I licked her to a next climax while Phillip took me from behind and watched over my shoulder.

Later, when we chilled a little on our bed, we took her between us and now and then our fingers met on her body lovingly. Helene had put her one arm under my head and held me close, and with the other hand she held Phillip's ever stiffening cock. And so we spent part of this rainy, dark afternoon. And I was glad to see how happy Phillip was.

There is so much to tell and the attention span of people is so short - this is at least what I have read in a magazine on psychology, and it seems that in our video-clip world anything which is longer that the average commercial is already too much for most. That's why I try to keep my blogs as short as possible and produce such awful cliffhangers - which on the other hand is also some kind of a game.

But now to our Sunday threesome, which was obviously so hard to begin. Although - before Helene arrived Phillip and I had quite a heated discussion, which might have cooled off our libidos just a tiny bit beforehand. The question was: should we do it with condoms or not. We know that Helene is on the pill and that it's very likely that she is clean. So Phillip argued that we could certainly do it without, which was much more satisfying for him (and certainly for his genes whose hearts must have jumped high at the thought of entering two women simultaneously.)

I on the other hand was thoroughly opposed to this: although I am not really afraid of AIDS, I know just too well that you can never really trust the heart of a woman, not even Helene's (not even mine!) What if for any reasons unfathomable to me she wished to go Kueken's way and chose to become pregnant? I know it's silly, and you should trust a friend, but yet ...

I got what I asked for. So while thinking how to begin, the condoms were ready, although not visible. And Phillip's little victory was (never give a man the impression that he has lost): Helene could suck him off without protection - should the events turn in this direction. So off we went ....

Rain, rain - pouring rain and near darkness already at 4 p.m. It was the same yesterday, so we lit a fire and it was cosy and warm in the living-room. But how do you change from tasty bread, butter, marmalade, cheese and eggs to wild sex? In films there is just a cut - suddenly they are naked and off they go. It's certainly done like this for a reason - even if we all sat there expectantly. Could I just say: "Anyone for coffee, or would you just like to go on with sex?" Certainly not - so we talked and talked and almost missed the moment at all. Reality makes some things pretty awkward.

And I was a little ashamed, because I had put this piece of cloth over my sofa and even told you of this, and only your reactions showed me how strange this was. House-proud, wasn't it - and there it was, waiting to catch some body fluids which I wasn't sure the were even going to flow. I just hoped the others would not notice and ask me.

It was finally Helene who broke the ice by saying that if we felt like it she would join with pleasure. Phillip's and my reaction were big, relieved smiles. But then again: who undresses first - does anyone want a shower first - and who touches who first so that no-one is left out - and so on and so far ...

Phillip has gone to the office; he promised to be back by noon. Then we will have brunch, to which we are having a guest: our next door neighbour Helene - we will eat and drink cheerfully, and maybe we will take our clothes off after the last bite of roll, butter and marmalade, or after I have made a last espresso, and we will fuck each other into the afternoon. It's such an unreal scenario still.

What is Phillip thinking of in his office, making sure that all is well for tomorrow's edition of the newspaper. Will he proof-read an article while he is semi-hard, overlooking an incorrect fact because in his mind he is mounting a woman he has only said good-morning to so far when passing their house? The wife of another, while I watch ready for him to be his next? Does he see us girls on each other, while he watches?

What is Helene thinking of next door? She has waved good-bye to her husband and son early - has she gone back to bed, is she even touching herself with thoughts of Phillip, or me - or is she dusting her flat or sewing on some buttons - on the blouse she will wear later. Or write a Christmas card to a friend? Will she hum to some music on the radio while her body tickles with the thought of her flesh being aroused ever so soon?

And what am I thinking of - here at the computer? The kitchen is ready, the living-room with the big leather sofa tidy. There is a colorful soft piece of cloth from Mexico spread over it to catch the fluids, to prevent the leather from getting stains. I'm just wearing a black t-shirt and some blue jean cut-offs on my bare skin - I feel that I am wet with expectation, but I am also doubtful if this is right and a little afraid of what will be afterwards.

Yes, you are right, ricobono, I do ask too much of you, my sweet readers and friends. You want to come here and understand what I write about at once, while I keep something like an intimate personal diary which also includes the lives of my friends. Some readers have called it a soap - and why not? Let's call it "Alpina's Anatomy" - after a program I sometimes watch and which also deals with "Who-does-what-with-who". I'll keep you informed about my friends Joerg and Elsie's plight, though.

Yesterday I started the afternoon with a wet kiss - yes, my neighbour Helene who came over for coffee. She is unhappy again because her husband and little Oliver will go to visit some old aunt who does not like Helene at all and only come back on Sunday late. It seems that his family was not pleased about him marrying Helene. Maybe I did a rash and a little desperate thing: I told her about Phillip wanting to do a threesome, and at the same time invited her to brunch tomorrow. She accepted with a smile. She is the only one I could think of.

Later I had a wonderful evening with Phillip - of the kind I hope we will have millions when we are married. We had dinner, good conversations with a lot of laughter, then a bath together and then we indulged our bodies and our senses making love for hours. That's when the time stops - and our minds and bodies gradually become one. After midnight I lost myself completely and passed out, to wake up in his arms this morning.

I of course told him about Helene and we discussed the pros and cons of fucking a neighbour, and we decided to take it easy and go along step by step.