Misspriss's blog post - Sometimes it's hard to catch a breath

In the past few weeks it has felt like the sky is falling.
I have learned that due to circumstances beyond my control, I will be losing my job. I love my job and my coworkers.
I have lost two people suddenly to death. The first was a family member, the second a coworker who was so much more. He was my friend. His death rocked my world.
I also have a family member who is dealing with health issues with her brand new baby. Big issues. Life and death issues. I keep thinking positive thoughts, but every once in a while the worst case scenario creeps in and my heart stops for a second. I love them both very much. Losing this tiny person would break me.
I don't have any person outside my family that I can lean on. My friends seem to have just disappeared for one reason or another. One moved and apparently out of sight is out of mind. One decided to stop being my friend because she is a judgmental fucking bitch. And I won't change the way I live my life for anyone.

If you've read this whiny fucking woe is me post, I'm sorry. I just needed to get it out. I'm drowning and I'm not sure where to go from here. I KNOW it gets better. I know the darkness will fade and the light will return. But right now, it's all dark.