tomorrow looks like it is going to be an interesting day. I will be going in for not so much an interview but to discuss what hours I want to work. Cross your fingers cause this guy sounds exactly like someone I want to work for. Upfront, no bullshit and here are your duties.(nothing sexual you damn pervs)
That is not really the interesting bit but the part I am most excited about.
Later in the day, early evening will be the really interesting bit. Some of you know a bit about my spawn. I have blogged tidbits. Remember my darling daughter and her adventures in mountain biking? Well she is at it again, not mountain biking this time but ghost hunting. She has been in contact with the local paranormal society. Tomorrow at 7pm I will be meeting the head honcho of CHAPS (local chapter), the Canadian Haunting and Paranormal Society.
When I was her age this would have facinated the hell out of me too but as a parent what I want to know is that she will be safe. I am always sceptical of "groups" and this one is no different. What has me laughing right now is the obligation to bring food to a pot luck. Hello! she is 17 and interested in the paranormal and I have to make a casserole?
She is excited and I will see if they are worth an hour of my time to send something feed them.
I really can't wait to hear the song and dance but have to be serious for her benefit.
Wish me luck (with CHAPS)and cross your fingers for some hrs at a job that sounds pretty damn good to me.
Shaking my head at it all,
ju

I read Ty's "are you living your life to the fullest" thread in the forum this morning and realised I have no quick answer. There are many things I am doing that I want to and there are many things I want to be doing but am not because I cannot for various reasons. There is no quick answer so I decided to not use the forum but rather my own little corner of the internet to try and clarify my thoughts.
I feel like I am on the cusp, stepping from one segment of my life to the next and because of that there is a certain satisfaction in what I have accomplished and a certain frustration because I cannot yet undertake what I want to do. I am a parent... but...
One of my children is ready to go out on her own in the foreseeable future, the other one may not be for many, many years if ever because of a disability.
So where does this leave me? Fullfilled or not? Actually it isn't so black and white.
On one hand I have been living life to its fullest. I wanted my children and have taken great joy in watching them grow, learn and become people in their own right. On the other hand I feel like my time should be coming again.
Is doing what you want when you want fullfilling or is doing what you want because you want to for others fullfilling? Is there a selfishness to being fullfilled or is there a satisfaction in knowing you have done a job well?
Most likely most of you will be like me, you will take pride in what you have accomplished and will take in stride anything that comes along.
Living your life to the fullest in the purest sense of the question is something only the younger of us can afford to do. Living your life to the fullest within the constraints of what life has handed you is something most of us have to deal with.
So am I living my life to the fullest?
I am trying my best,
ju

I have kept my mouth shut for a good long time... but now I want to speak.
I once had a friend, someone I trusted completely, for many years until... something happened that was a set back, a great disappointment to me. Something that didn't affect this friend in any way, shape or form. It was something that upset me. I was looking for nothing other than a shoulder to cry on. What happened next was totally unreal.
This so called friend decided to make me feel "better" by letting loose what I suppose was supposed to be a big secret. Something that had been held in and taken as gospel for over half a decade. This information came second hand to this friend but was accepted without question and then passed along without a single thought. This friend forgot I was there and that I was well aware of what went on, once I got over the initial huh??
For a short time it devestated me. A very short time because I verified the information with the people who really mattered, the so called friend had nothing to do with any of it other than to be, stupid, gullible and willing to take any little bit of gossip as the truth without taking into consideration circumstances, long term information and the fact that they knew virtually nothing about the one they were trying to trash.
In an instant this so called friend destroyed many years of trust. The ironic thing is this person hasn't got a fucking clue about what is and always has been.
This so called friend has no spine, nor personality of its own, it has borrowed quite liberally from the personalities of others who it "admires" but probably hates because these others are what it has always wanted to be.
I have lost nothing.
It has lost everything laying itself on false laurels of integrity.
Some things really are worth fighting for and when asked to discuss what was going on this so called friend flat out refused. I know, I KNOW, that somewhere deep down this person is experiencing remorse but it is up to them to morph into the person they could be rather than the facade they have been and to own up to its mistake.
Would I accept it? Possibly. Would I trust again?
Most likely not. What I might do if that happened is give the respect it craves because that would be the first step towards earning it.
A cleansed,
ju

He left at 6 am.
4 days can go wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too fast.
I started missing him before he even left the driveway.

Poor man, I have worn him right out..
He is napping on the couch behind me.
Having the bestest time.
Can't stop smiling,
ju

And we are all sick!!!
Sfuffy, achey and tired,
ju

never ceases to amaze me on this site.
Every single one of you has a cock. Why would you think that I should be gratefull if you lived closer? Why would you think I would want to fuck you just because you think you want me?
There is a person behind my pics. A human being you wouldn't dare to address in the same way if you were to meet me face to face.
I really don't give a shit about your cock or anyones for that matter.
I am impressed by minds, brains, intelligence, humour. That is what makes my libido go through the roof.
Put your cock away, it won't impress me unless you can show me there is a man behind the member but then again if you were capable of doing that you would have bothered to get to know me and have read my profile. Which would have told you...
never mind.
Preaching to the choir,
ju

and I missed its passing.
I had an interesting day today and made a new friend. After all of the stress we got really talking.
Her culture still supports the idea of "Aunties" and "Uncles"
As a young kid I had a bazillion Aunties and Uncles and by association cousins. It took me untill my early teens to figure out that these people weren't relatives at all. I had two Aunts and their spouses which were Uncles. But they never meant as much to me as my Aunties and Uncles.
Why? Because the Aunties and Uncles were part of my day to day life. They were people I could count on to fill in if my parents weren't there. They were given the titles because they were deserving of them as close family friends. I loved them, they loved me. The culture at the time demanded the adults took care of the children and the children showed respect and appreciation for the extended family.
It wasn't untill today when my new friend brought it up that I realised what had been lost. My kids have no "Aunties and Uncles" what they have instead adults who now just go by first names putting them selves on the same plane as the kids. There is no suggestion that these adults are to be trusted any more than their friends at school. In reality there is no divide between adult and child.
Have we done a diservice to our children by allowing them to call trusted adults by their first names?
Thinking that there was always comfort in knowing my "Aunties, Uncles and cousins" were always there for me.
Whistfull,
ju

an evening on the porch.
She really didn't want my help what she wanted was a sounding board and then someone to take the load off for a few mins here and there. I am so out of practice being with toddlers my mind was spinning.
I was the meanie, if you are going to ride your bike or the skate board you have to have a helmet. My name is not "HEY" and I will be adressed appropriately and politely. Almost 2 hrs later, kids calm, Mom calm and I was ready for a break. Did I really do this full time with my own???
Half an hr break enjoying the silence and the relatively cooler breeze and time to call a friend down the way.
She may be moving across the country. I told her she wasn't allowed but in between lots of chatter (our kids are the same age.)the baby next door needed attn, neither of us flinched. The mom did tho and complained and bragged at the same time. All we did was agree.
The babies and toddlers and their parents went in. We breathed a sigh of relief.
How the hell did we make it through that? Are we still sane? Probably not!
When people ask what age would you go back to my answer is always none, I like where I am.
My daughter is doing her lifeguards this week and my son is starting high school on Tues.
Would I go back?
Only in my memories...
ju

for some soup base that we haven't been able to get here in years.
Honig mushroom soup base. It comes in a packet, dried etc. It is essential for a fave soup. The product is Dutch but I am hoping someone somewhere knows where I can find it!
Because it is cool out today I am craving soup.
Hoping someone somewhere knows how I can get my hands on some,
ju