Still in hypersomnia mode though I can just feel the restorative qualities that it will eventually bring. And I can't wait because if I play my cards right it will result in more stamina and less pain. And hopefully resuming my workout program.

Been familiarizing myself with amcut because she is a fellow North Carolinian, and I am hoping that she lives in Charlotte. I'll be moving there in several months and can't tell how happy this makes me. My and my best bud ET are always looking to add new people to the fold, and I think amcut would be a perfect fit. I agree with her on many many things and always nice to have someone like that in your life.

For instance, she expressed dislike for porn that shows women receiving what I deem as quite violent blow jobs. And I understand perfectly as I too am disturbed my this. Internet porn has certainly changed up the rules somewhat, and I find myself yearning for those old school days when sex seemed to more of a sensual experience rather than a technical one.

And just when I thought I had seem and heard it all I received a message asking if I had any interest in fisting. And the thing that bothers me the most about this is the fact that women on this site should not be immediately judged as one things or another. I feel that the women of NN do an excellent job of protraying their image of choice, and that no man should be confused as to what the deal is. I also feel after reading numerous blogs that we truly have some classy, savvy, and intelligent women here that deserve to be treated with respect, dignity, and last but not least...commom courtesy. I of course realize that one bad apple certainly does not spoil the entire bunch, but I would like to see the trend slow down.

One week til hearing!!! CANNOT WAIT!!!! Hope this time next week I am telling you some great things!!!!

Good start to the week everyone.

(And G...I changed my mind. I went for the glazed raspberry filled. Was an excellent choice!!!)

Going to get drivers license renewed in the morning. Oh joy.

Hope that everyone has a great weekend.


And G, I like chocolate covered creme filled please!!

Back into hypersomnia mode. Completely strange how I go through these periods where I can sleep days upon days. But when it ends, I always feel much better and more importantly look much better. Nice to get rid of the awful black circles which I loathe!!! Just up now to check email, grab a bite to eat, then it's back to bed.

For this entire year, I have been 45 on NN. But like to say it's official on Saturday. Afraid there will be no celebration again this year, but no big deal. Keeping my plans moving forward is a much more important to me than cake. Though I think a couple of Krispy Kremes might be in order!!!

Wasn't going to write today, but the subject simply could not be ignored!! Some of you know that I contracted Lyme Disease some years ago, so imagine my surprise when I woke up and saw "Lyme Disease Symptoms" as #2 on Yahoo top searches of the day. I had no idea how in the hell this had happened, and then the phone rang. And of course I'm sure that many of you have heard that President Bush was treated for Lyme in 06. And here he is. The celebrity patient that we have all dreamed about.

This has the potential to change everything in Lyme world. I don't know if it will, but opportunity has knocked. But for right now, I just know that this news could be of particular help to me.

My hearing for approval of disability benefits will be held on August 27. The case I feel has solid documentation, but there are few things that have worried a few of my health care providers. First...I often look like the picture of health. Secondly..ignorance. Lyme Disease is not prevalent in my state, and most people know more about SARS, Anthrax, and West Nile though MUCH MUCH less likely to contract any of the latter. And then there is the fact that I've been out of work for almost 5 years now which needless to say has meant a unwanted change in lifestyle. But hopefully, my judge caught the news today. Just this one announcement may make something that looked terribly daunting rather a walk in the park. And considering that I have waivered in my faith over the last several weeks, I feel sure this is a sign of reassurance.

But jeers to BBC. The announcement was not made on BBC World News tonight. I think our European commrades deserve the nod of attention as many of them suffer from this also. However, message boards are lighting up like Christmas trees. It's fabulous to see acknowledgement that is so well deserved.

Nice to be appreciated for "weather comments" also.

Still hot...still busy...still in the weekdays. After tomorrow I will have an entire weekend to myself. Looking so forward to the fact that I refuse to do anything responsible for 3 entire days!!

It is now 4:02 am...just in from a cigarette run. And though I don't know the exact temperature, it's still hot. For everyones sake, hope this ends soon.

Still down in the trenches, but can't resist to get my words on the page. Horrible last couple of weeks and trying to pull my way out of a very dreary and painful state of being.

So got to thinking. I've never read anyone who has written about a funny incident regarding sex. Now I am certain that someone has, but I just haven't been lucky enought to catch it. Therefore, I decided to tell you one of mine.

Going to say it was around 10 years ago....I know I was at least 35. I was bartending in a business class hotel which I do consider the best job that I ever had. While the illness was not quit so raging at this time, I still had to conservative with my time. And the hotel was the perfect opportunity to combine a paycheck as well as a social life. And for eight years worked perfectly for me.

Anyway...had met this guy from Wales that was just a very nice guy, but he was married so no excitement there. However, after his departure he started to call me from time to time. Annoyed me because chatting up married men has never been my thing.

So he calls one day. Starts with the routine..."how are you" yada yada yada. Then he asked..quite out of the blue..."what are you wearing?" And my first thought is..."That's a strange question." So here I am looking down to see what I am indeed wearing still thinking to myself..."wonder why he would want to know what I am wearing?" Then it hit me...and I had a nuclear breakdown. Shook my up so bad that all I could do was hang up the phone.

Poor Clive had no way of knowing that I had nevered uttered a dirty word to anyone in any circumstance in my life. Still holds true to this day though my attitude has changed quite drastically. Though I can do dirty chat like a motherfucker as long as I feel well enough. But I really hope Clive didn't return to Wales telling all the guys..."you know it seems that American womem are protrayed as open, liberal, and independent...but I'm not sure about that." All I can say is...sorry American ladies...hope I didn't dent our reputation!!!!

Logged in and for the first time say lots of familar names on the blog roll, but unfortunately will not be able to check in. I continue to get sicker; however, the weather has been unbearably hot and humid which always tends to drag me down.

I certainly miss reading about the lives of the blogging set. It has always been a a raving success as far as taking me into to others people worlds and letting me forget about mine. And I really would like that now, but I have to limit reading and writing due to fierce headaches. So for the time being, I just go to the pics instead. I like to comment when I feeled moved, and I at least like to believe that recipients are happy about it.

Let loose on that last blog now didn't I? But I do have to say that it's better for me to let it all out here rather than to the people who irritate me to death. Cause unfortunately the people around me WANT to fight...and I have no interest. I try to tell myself that they grew up in bad circumstances...I try to tell myself that they have fallen into a horrible rut and without some sort of horrible catalyst, that's where they will stay. Therefore Mont...if they were normal people...I might could back them down. But instead I've decided this is the best place for me to vent at the present.

And yes Mont, expect a PM soon...just not a ranting one!!!

Presently I'm trying to figure out how to dump my home health agency. It's a small firm which provides little service, but drawing checks from Medicaid for much larger amounts. And if you ask yourself, why not just fire them, report them, etc.? well..it's because I value my life a little too much. These people "ain't playin". They talk openly about the fraud and it has really played on mind lots these last several weeks. Not to mention...the situation has become so dicey that I'm packing up as much as I can and taking it to my mom's. Theft..yes I think that's a distinct possibility too. So the big lie starts tomorrow, and I just hope I can stand up against this woman and keep the lie going cause one way or another I'm bringing these people down. To intimidate a defenseless part of the population, as well as NOT taking care of them as directed by the State is beyond belief. My stomach has been in knots for weeks over this, and I have to make my move now or I know things will just get worse.

I tell ya...if it's not one thing it's another. How about some props people? Cause when I look back at everything, I just don't know how I've made it this far. And when I do bring these people down, I will certainly let you know.

So many new names here..WOW!!..been impossible for to catch up, but I will be reporting in when I am able. A special thanks today to my Alabama boys...Mont and Cool. Holla!!