srebbew's blog post - Update 21.05.11

Saturday, May 21, 2011, 10:05:25 PM

Went to see my mother today, its less than a week since I last saw her and my god she has got worse, I know she has reliased what is happening and eventualy what the outcome is going t be but to see someone that you love deteriate and effectively dissintagrate before your eyes it kills you inside.
I cant show this to her though she needs to feel that its all goood even if deepo down I am sure she knows what I am feeling we both put on our best faces for each other.
Her voice is getting slured when she talks now as she doesnt have the strength to control her own thoughts through her body.
I am also now worring that it is becoming to much for my day, He had a major heart operation just over a year ago and now he is starting to get heart twinges again. This is not what was supossed to happen, Life is so cruel and at the moment I have had my fill of it........
Sorry not a good day. It started so well but I cant help feeling helpless and it is killing my resolve....
I'm going to leave it here as it is all starting to get a bit muddled and my emotions are getting the better of me.

Thank you for reading and sorry for ranting it is my way of dealing with a very tuff period in my life.

I WILL SURVIVE!!!!! ;0} x x x

Comments

Others Have Said:

purr_tato on 21-May-11 22:33:22

hug her while you can and your dad will want to be with her every minute he can i guess you have to bear the burden but remember this, you are all blessed, you have had your mum this long, what a gift and you still have your dad, and they love each other, something for a son to see and to strive to obtain
hugs for today and another for tomorrow

happyhumper69 on 21-May-11 23:57:59

hang in there mate. I lost mom to cancer 6 years ago and watched my dad undergo a triple bypass 2 years ago. It hurts...but the hurt can't erase the memories of a loving family.