suthernlover's blog post - Broke my own heart.

I've been seeing the same Dr for about 5 years now. On my very first visit his nurse came in to take vitals and history and my heart, but she was married. I had to put what I was feeling in the back of my mind and reason that this gorgeous creature was just going to be a welcome relief to my boring everyday life. We began talking and over the months and years we got more and more personal. It even got to some intimate detail of our personal lives. We became more and more comfortable. Last year the conversations started centering around her marital difficulties.

Then in March she announced she was moving out and my heart jumped in my throat. I made an offer of my truck and help with her move and I gave her my cell phone. With that I got bold and took her hands in mine and leaned in and kissed her cheek.

On June 13th she called and my asshole cramped shut as I thought she was calling as my nurse. Then the heart stopped when she asked, " What are you doing?, wanna do something together?"

I showed up at her place and had to just had to Kiss her to get it out of the way.

She talked about things we were going to do in the future. By the 4th of July we'd slept together making out but when it got time to fuck I couldn't. I over thought the situation as she was holing my cock ready to guide it in her pussy I thought, shit she's still married and I couldn't. the following weekend we went to her mother's house away and it turned out to be her brothers birthday, and we slept in the same bed.

We'd been talking and kissing and holding and everything short of sex until the Sunday of that weekend. Then on the way home she broke out several cds to listen to on the way back which i thought was weird.

I had fallen in love with this woman 16 yrs my junior. I trusted her completely because until that day we'd shared everything openly. But listening to music with no conversation was different. I felt something was up. I didnt ask.

The following weekend she made plans to return to her Mother's and I had plans to visit my daughter at college ... we were saying we loved one another, talked and sent text messages.

I made it back to my neck of the woods and she called me and told me that she'd decided to go back to her husband because of lots of drama but she assured me it was only temporary.

The short of the story is that we aren't talking now. She has told me it was never her intent to hurt my feelings and she's said she loves me.

And I have finally realized that I have been used and used to the max and I let is all happen I gave my permission for her to hurt me and it SUCK! Sucks donkey dicks.