Remember two Jags Prescott and now we have Two Letters Boris. Is he mendacious or merely self serving? We are all a little like that. Some of the great ones were always that way inclined. Nelson at the Battle of Copenhagen held his spyglass to his blind eye and said, "I see no ships" when told there were too many enemy ships and he should retreat. Anyhow, there are people who go too far, like Nixon when he ordered the raid on Watergate. But Boris hasn't done that. He's been up front and regardless of the posturing there has been no actual dissembling. Which is to say it is past time this Brexit nonsense was done and dusted. The tendentious ones are those MPs. Time we had a general election and got rid of the whole bunch of them.

Am feeling a little grumpy today.

I am world weary today. Like a what the fuck does life matter for sort of day. Pathetic you could say with some justification. What is the point of being like that. Pull yourself together. Pull your fucking socks up. But then I am not content. Cows are content and who wants to be a cow? I want to move on. It is the gypsy in me. You got that kinda mood now and again or are you anchored to a spot building your own little cell of goodliving? Lucky you then. I have been like that and I may be again. Dominion over your own little patch is a precious thing but I do not have it currently and I want to be elsewhere. And is that the cause of my world weariness? Not exactly and yet the lack of dominion over my own life is an element in it. Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely said Lord Acton, but powerlessness is a deeper corruption and more dangerous. Powerlessness corrodes the soul. Is that then at root my problem? And is that in part the essence of why I particularly enjoy the absolute dominion involved in BDSM or DDLG relationships? Perhaps. And is that why I am world weary this day? Yes / no / maybe in part but not really. Have I lost trust in authority? Is that it? We are going to have fucking Euro elections here in Britain. Our politicians are pointless wankers who couldn't organise a piss up in a brewery. A bunch of primary school children could do better. And before you get prideful - America is no fucking better. What - are you going to go to war with Iran now? Over what? have we not learnt from Afghanistan, Iraq and Libya, from Vietnam, Korea and the rest of the pointless futile wars? We needed retribution for 9/11? Of course we did. The little shits that were responsible needed punishing but that is no excuse for ripping the world apart. Had I a woman to fuck hell out of and then rest and then fuck hell out of again would that cure me of my world weariness? probably. but I haven't at present and though a woman could cure it, the lack of a woman is not at root the cause. That much I know. There are other cures. getting drunk with my buddy. Going on an adventure like one of the hobbits. But for reasons too convoluted to go into those too are denied me at present. Perhaps all of the above is my problem and I am just pissed with the world. Sometimes talking about it helps. Which is what I am doing now am I fucking not? Should feel better then, shouldn't I? Perhaps I do.

I want to write about celibacy but first a little context. Three years ago I had a delightful BDSM sub I have called Ella. Two years ago I had a wonderful DDLG little that I have called Sasha. They went from my life. My choice more than theirs. Then for a year I was celibate. Then for a year I watched porn occasionally but only rarely masturbated. Well let me digress. Masturbation can be frustrating for a man in a way it perhaps is not for a woman. I love watching a woman masturbate. Mostly I guess because I love watching a woman cum. It turns me on. Some of them they sort of quiver. Some of them roll their eyes. Most of them moan. They say a woman can fake it but she cannot really, She can't fake the throes of a real orgasm. Though men are happy to be fooled perhaps for the sake of their vanity. I am rambling here as so often but masturbation can leave a man unfullfilled in a way making love to a woman does not. That driving yourself deep into a woman, flesh on flesh, that consuming of her, mouth on mouth, your manhood pulsing as you crush her beneath you in the abandoned throes of your brief but total orgasm that litterally drains the life from you and leaves you sated and so so so so so so so so so so so much better. So much better. Masturbation cannot do that for a man. Masturbation is so shallow. A momentary relief that is no real relief but leaves you with the same problem, the same unfulfilled need. Where was I, celibacy. You see celibacy is good. I could be a saint. I could think no evil. I could ignore women. I could indeed be considerate of others. I have been and I am. Sometimes I look at women as sex objects. Sometimes as people. Sometimes I avoid looking at them at all. Women are a huge issue for me. But celibacy works. If you make it total. Complete purity. Saintlike sainthood. It fucking works. I have been there and done it for months on end. And then woosh the tide comes in and you notice fucking women again and you start predatory hugging to begin with. You know - the hug that lasts longer than the two seconds maximum for decency. And you start flirting. And then you are fucked and women become an obsession again. I sometimes wish we could do without them. It would be so much fucking easier. So so much easier. If wishes were horses. We can't. It is the human condition. I am fucked. Or rather I am not fucked in this instance. Which is the problem.

Cause and effect. Women are beautiful. Men want women. And there are classic ideas of beauty, ideals: Helen of Troy, Cleopatra, Marilyn Monroe, Keira Knightly. Blaise Pascal once said, "Had Cleopatra's nose been shaped differently, the history of the world would have been changed". But he was wrong really. There are many incredible beauties. What made Mark Anthony go to war over Cleopatra? Her nose? Nope. She must have been an incredible flirt I imagine. I mean you know what makes us want a woman. Keira Knightly is an incredible beauty? Sure. But what makes her desirable? The way she flirts I guess. I mean that final scene from Pride and Prejudice when she says to Mr Darcy, "Your hands are cold". It's not what she says it's the way that she says it. We all want her. So all women are beautiful if they know how to be beautiful. The fat ones, the thin ones, the short ones, the tall ones. OK there are constraints. Yes I find very plump women attractive, even women who are clinically obese like, say, the British comedienne Dawn French. But I couldn't fuck one. Sorry, I don't mean to be rude, I mean I would find it difficult. Just mechanically difficult. I have tried in the past to make love to very plump women. Believe me it can be challenging. So as a rule I would not want one as a lover. Same with those ultra skinny "Twiggy" like women. Unfuckable for different reasons. Quite apart from the fact that you would be afraid you would break them, when you stripped them down it would be weird. It would be like child molesting. Sorry just stating a fact in regard to me and the way I am. That aside beauty is not an issue of your profile or your cheekbones or the fullness of your lips or the wideness of your eyes. It helps of course but it is secondary. The main thing is not the wideness but rather the wildness of your eyes. The main thing - by a fucking mile - is how vibrant or sultry the woman is, how interested in you, how charming. Means you are always on display? Of course you fucking well are - same for a man. he is always on display. whether he makes the effort is a different matter. I know one guy who is pig ugly but always has women surrounding him and has multiple wives and girlfriends. why? he is interested in them is why. Genuinely interested. he asks about them and how they are and what they are doing. Most men don't give a fuck about anything but themselves so are less fascinating. And what is true about most men is true about most women. David Mellor the staggeringly ugly former Tory Minister was always covered in beautiful women. because he was rich and powerful. yes up to a point, women can find wealth and power intensely sexually stimulating. But mostly he got women because he liked women, as ugly as sin though he was. You get my point. It's not what you've got, it's the way that you use it. Sure make the best of what you've got. Take care over your appearance, look snappy. Else who the fuck would want you. Same goes for a bloke. So basically it's not the package, it's the way you use the package that makes you irresistible - irresistible like little old me

So what makes a woman perfect? By which I mean perfect. The woman you end up with is often the one who is most precocious, the difficult one it is hard to catch. That's because men are hunters I guess. But perfect? Sexually there are obvious things but then good sex is not, curiously, the main driver when it comes to female perfection. I mean it is great to have a woman that cums quickly. I had an affair with an Israeli girl much my own age for a while and she would cum as soon as look at you, touch her twice and she'd cum. A delight for a male but that's just because we are lazy. I also like girls who throw themselves totally into sex. The ones who if you are on top of them lift their legs into the air and point their toes, scratch your back and moan loud, very loud for preference. Well having a mistress scratch your back is not the best for a married man, but that aside it's perfect. That total abandon is a delight. And I said before but I like a girl to be clean, not for instance to taste salty if you go down on her, And of course compliance and submission is great, But that applies both inside and outside the bedroom. The girls who want you to rule them, choose for them, tell them, for example ask you to order their food for them in a restaurant, that sort of thing. The girls that treat you like their king. That said they need to be cheeky and feisty - you know what I mean. They ask your opinion, agree with it, then go do the opposite. Those are the fascinating women. They have strong opinions of their own and express them. They just choose to accept you are right in the end even though they don't really think so. I like girls that dress sexy but preferably not too slutty. That's a fine line of course so it's difficult. I like girls that flirt endlessly when they are with you - but flirt with you - never ever with other men. The girls that flirt with a man other than the one they are with when they are together with someone are just sluts and complete trash. Same applies to men that do that sort of thing of course. If they flirt with a woman other than the one they are with, they are cunts and worthless cunts of the worst kind. Now why do we call worthless men cunts when a woman's cunt is the thing we most cherish? But then women do that sort of thing too I guess, they say he or she is a prick. Odd people aren't we? I am saying all this stuff and yet I believe in male-female equality. I mean fucking total equality. Genuinely. How do you get your head round that? Kinda weird but true. I am even a bit of a feminist. makes no sense does it? A paradox I guess.

Nope. I was being sarcastic so keep your hair on. I did not actually mean we should get rid of all our politicians in some sort of grand Guy Fawkes sort of moment. Tempting though it may be. I was actually being sarcastic. But then in an era in which Britain has become the knife crime capital of the WORLD (ugh ! !) and America has become the world capital for mass killings in peacetime (yuck ! !) you have to hesitate about being sarcastic - with good reason. Cartoongirl made a very interesting point about something in this regard on her blog recently [https://www.newbienudes.com/blog/cartoongirl/?fp=y] in which she was saying in effect that if you are going to defend free speech, don’t defend your own speech, don’t defend speech you agree with, don’t defend speech you find acceptable. Ok sort of related indirectly. She was making the point the way I read it that you cannot be too politically correct. Or should not at least. It was World Press Freedom day yesterday (I think) and the British Foreign Office (our Foreign Ministry) was making a fuss about the issue but then it is a bit hypocritical to do so in a world in which Britain imprisons Julian Assange. Wouldn't you say? Am I rambling? Perhaps I am. I will shut up and fucking well go away until tomorrow and then I'll restrict myself to talking about sex. Much safer territory. Well I fucking well hope so. Not sure of anything these days.

So, this is not about one side or the other. In the current UK political divide I am by instinct Remain - though if I were Brexit my sentiments would be the same. For those of you that are not British let me clarify, we have just had (on Thursday) local government elections across much (though not all) of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and neither of the two main parties - Labour and "Tory" - did well. This because the people of Britain decided to punish the politicians for their incompetent failure to deliver anything constructive, one way or another, on "Brexit". If they continue to fail to deliver on Brexit, they will be punished again in the European elections later this year. I am pleased they were punished. They fucking deserved it. Had I the opportunity I would probably line them up against a wall and shoot them. Do I mean that literally? Possibly I do. Possibly I fucking well do. Hmm would I take pleasure in so doing? Perhaps I am a true Sadist after all. But here's my question: all this failure to agree a way forward on the part of our politicians - is it the product of bad luck, of chance, of a series of circumstances that have undermined what are genuine people struggling to make the best of a difficult situation? Or is this incompetence born of a self serving and pretentious attitude on the part of politicians who are governed primarily by hubris? The latter I think. Therefore it is reasonable to suggest that they would best serve the nation, the whole fucking lot of them in parliament, if they all fell on their swords. What a pleasant fucking image. In a metaphorical way that is what they are doing, the politicians of the major parties, by their failure to get on with things. The British people like strong leadership. we don't vote governments in - we vote governments out when they no longer serve us well. However we are left in dire circumstances when neither the government nor the opposition are serving us well. We are xxxxxx to resorting to voting for the little people, the Greens, the independents, even the fucking Liberals who couldn't tell you the time of day if you stuck a watch in front of their noses. We don't like doing that - voting for the little people I mean. We prefer our two party system and not having to think about things to deeply (like the Americans with their Republicans and Democrats). But if we are fucking xxxxxx to we will fucking change our habits. Stupid fucking politicians deserve everything they fucking get.

So what's the difference anyway. Well I guess there is (or can be) bondage in both and dominance and submission in both and punishment and reward in both. BDSM is more a simple Master/Slave relationship. In DDLG the sub tends to be more of a role player, more into dressing up in little pleated skirts and being precociously girly - and as a rule the punishment is more playful. My sub Ella was more a BDSM girl. I had a sub, let's call her "Sasha from Germany", though that wasn't her name, who was a DDLG sort of girl. Well girl? My subs are women, all of them in their forties. Not that I would mind a young chicken - but I don't seek them out and it is natural for someone older like me to gravitate towards mature women who are old enough to know what they want out of life. They are also possibly more adventurous on balance - but maybe I'm mistaken in that, young women can certainly be great risk takers. Anyway so where was I? So for instance I would meet Sasha in the early evening and take her for a bite to eat. But unlike with Ella where she was a real slave and there was no pretence involved, you knew that Sasha was role playing and she enjoyed doing it. So she would take her coat off and she would be dressed in something crazy like one of those pleated plaid mini skirts that looked school girl like or some slightly slutty but charming off the shoulder but girlish dress. She wouldn't give a fuck about whether eyes turned in the restaurant. I would order for both of us but she would protest and say can't I have this or that? And I would of course say no and tell her to shut up and stop talking and she would rabbit on regardless and say with a coy smile that "you know how to stop me talking" meaning I could do so later when we were alone with my manhood in her mouth. Later of course when I took her to the hotel she would throw herself into total submission. She would invariably be wearing incredible underwear too, my favourites being the crotchless frilly white panties with a little blue ribbon she bought online which highlighted the engorged lips of her deliciously warm cunt when she bent over. I mean in many respects Ella and Sasha behaved the same. You spanked them each slap and tickle fashion until their asses were cherry red and they both squirmed until they were close to cumming. And neither needed to use a safe word though they both had one. I would know the line from their reaction and would draw back if I started to cross it. Which says something about me too. I am neither truly BDSM nor truly DDLG but rather somewhere in the middle because I enjoy testing the pain / pleasure threshold and the dominance involved. Primarily it is the dominance that turns me on. But I am no true Sadist because if I were inflicting pain on a masochist would be my prime objective. What I enjoy is the total obedience of the slave to her master. Just that. I am not sure I would want a slave who was a total masochist because I am no total Sadist.

Still thinking of cause and effect. I mean what the fuck makes us do what we do? Nations are easier to look at than people. Most nations, Britain and the USA for example, just react when something happens and that reaction to circumstance is really not predicated on any clear strategy, it is knee jerk. There are a few nations, just a very few, that have clear policies. France for example whose behaviour in the international arena is predicated on what's best for France and not on any muddied sense of idealism. Same with people. Most people just do what comes next. The girl smiles at me, I shall try and screw her. The girl doesn't smile at me and I shan't. Makes sense doesn't it? And yet at a deeper level we really should be more than automatons and we should make the effort to determine our future in a rational considered way. Thus breaking the mold. Not that I mean breaking the mold in some "Dice Man" random way (did you ever read that crazy novel - it was influential in its day but dangerous - this guy would toss a dice to determine what he would do next - I tried it a few times and it landed me in some really big shit and I seriously do not recommend it). But instead considering what you will do and truly taking advantage of your Free Will. Else what the fuck are we put on this earth for. If it is all "this happens so I do that" then we are no better than machines and life is fucking pointless. So do it. Decide something today and do something you might not otherwise have done, break the mold, peel away from the herd, be different. What was it Woody Allen said, "Life is as short as a butterfly's fart and death lasts forever". Well he's a silly old bugger but there is an element of truth in that - Life goes by and slips through your fingers like water and you can't hold any of it back. God I need a fucking mistress. But then that's a reaction to a basic animal need. Many of my needs are reactions on an "I am hungry so I will eat" or "hit me and I hit you" basis. Hit me and I don't hit you would be breaking the mold. At least for someone like me it would. Anyway nothing is worse - nothing is worse - than disempowerment. We need to take control of our lives. Take control. do it. Take over and run your life. It's fucking worth it.

So here's the thing. I was talking about Ella earlier. She was in a sense the best I ever had. Not literally the best at making love. She had her flaws. But the best all round package. And that was, in large degree, because she was the most proactively submissive. The most fascinating girls are the ones that pretend to be submissive but then do the opposite. That of course is a basic fact of life that women inevitably fail to comprehend - else they would have men following them around like puppy dogs. And if you are a woman reading this you will fail to understand this because you are evolutionary hot-wired to fail to understand it. You want to think the best of men and do not want to think they are easilly manipulated. Women are easilly manipulated. One of the basic weaknesses that the male often exploits in the female is their predilection to guilt. Women are in love with guilt., It turns them on sexually. They wallow in it, analysing their failures in ways men are incapable of doing. Anyhow I digress except to say that Ella had a way of manipulating you - letting you feel you were in total control whilst in some ways she built the agenda. When we got into the bedroom, she would take the initiative and go to the centre of the room and kneel on the floor and say, "What do you want me to do now Master?" As a rule, I would take that as my cue to go to the bathroom and wash my manhood and them come back and stand over her because I would like her to start by taking my manhood in her mouth whilst looking up at me. Well Ok a bit bog standard but it was the way it went. I would put a leash on her first, not to lead her anywhere, more symbolic than anything. This before I told her to undress. Oh yes a note about this washing thing. I regard it as a mutual courtesy. I fucking hate it when you go down on a girl and she tastes salty because she hasn't washed herself properly after her last pee even though she knows you may be going down on her. Girls must hate it when a man is smelly I imagine. Why for fuck's sake not be clean. I mean don't you wash your hands after you piss? Same sort of thing. A basic rule. Ok - gotta go - more follows maybe something different tomorrow and more sex the day after - Big hugs - x