I "have a case of the Mondays..."

Feeling kind of down and don't know what to do. Someone I love more than I love myself is hurting so bad inside and I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say. I feel powerless and useless. I know that no matter what I say to him it is all just words and noises and none of it will make him feel any better. Powers beyond our control are calling the shots. So what to do? Say things that he doesn't want to hear? Like 'it will all get better, things happen for a reason, etc etc?' What a bunch of tripe. I know deep down that eases nothing. Do I just sit there and say nothing then? I don't know what to do. What I do know for a fact is that there is nothing I CAN do to help him, and that really sucks.

Puurrs to all,

Currently listening to: Morphine "Buena"

I am so over the rain right now. I know we need it, but I am tired of it. I am way over the cold, too. As a matter of fact I am so over Winter it's not even funny. I hate the cold. I know my whining about temps will fall on deaf ears to the folks in the Midwest & back East. I can't take the cold and once it's hits 58 I am miserable.

I couldn't imagine living anywhere where it snows. Snow? Holy shit. I am a California girl; give me summer and warmth. I hate wearing clothes so I love Summer. Summer means little or no clothes for me. If I am home alone I am naked. Hell I am even naked out in my backyard, I could give a shit if anyone sees lol.

I just got done cleaning out my dresser and looking longingly at my cute shorts and skirts all while shivering in sweatpants, long sleeves and a scarf. I am even wearing socks and I HATE wearing socks!

Every time I walk by the thermostat I crank it up. Someone keeps turning it down. Hmmm. I suspect my husband. It certainly isn't our son, and the cats can't reach it. See my hubby and I have opposite body thermostats. He is always hot and I am always cold. I keep flannel sheets, 2 down comforters and a quilt on our bed year-round. I will be shivering underneath the mound of covers while he is lying on top of them sweating. Even in Summer I am under the blankies, but he turns on the AC so I feel like an ice cube.

As for the rain and the storms, we have been hit with a series of them. A lot of high winds and deluge conditions. It had been raining so much so fast that creeks and streets are flooded. The winds were so high that trees are falling all over the place. Just today I saw a brand new SUV crushed under a fallen tree. The car was parked in the people's driveway. It is a total loss. Across the street from that another person's driveway is blocked by a fallen tree. Across the street from us our neighbor has a tree down in his front yard. Tons of fences down, too and many people are still without power. Our basement flooded which sucks bigtime. I think the carpet is ruined down there. What a mess. Our backyard looks a total mess. No point in doing anything about it now, another storm is coming in. Lovely. I have my candles at the ready. We haven't lost power yet (knock wood) but we have been lucky. I am so looking forward to Summer...you have no idea...

Puurrs to all,

Currently listening to: OutKast "Hey Ya!"

It has been pouring - and I mean pouring - rain all last night and so far this morning. Hella windy, too. I didn't sleep much at all because the sound of the wind scares the crap out of me. Unless you have lived in a very old and creaky house, with double-hung windows that bang and rattle with every gust, you wouldn't know what I mean. Our house is like a living thing: constantly settling, making little noises here and there, but it gets creepy in the high wind and rain.

It is so dark and gray outside from the storm that it looks more like dusk than 9:30am. We opened the front door and saw that the gutter in front of our driveway is flooded up to the sidewalk. I haven't been down to the basement yet so I am wondering if we have any flooding down there. I had put all the poultry feeders in the coop yesterday for the hens so they won't be in the rain today. They will be spending the time indoors, I am sure. Chickens aren't fond of the rain. Two of the girls have started laying again which is early as they usually don't go back into lay till Spring. I am glad I took care of the birds yesterday when it was dry. I would hate to have had to go out and slog my way thru the muddy, chickenshitty quagmire that the chicken yard becomes in bad rain. If this storm continues like this we may need to go get another truckload of sand for the coop or we will be sinking ankle-deep in mire. Gack.

So much for living in 'Sunny California'

lol


Puurrs to all,

Currently listening to: Peter Murphy "Cuts You Up"

Fuck, am I cursed or something today????

I fed my son and myself some lunch after coming home from the gym and I was so looking forward to a super hot shower so I crank up the hot water and step in. I am getting all nice and drenched but then the shower head keeps tipping down. I keep pushing it back up and it does this three more times till all of a sudden I get a blast of COLD water right up my snoot!

I am gasping and screaming (I had gone from super hot to ice cold) and trying to turn the shower head away from my face but it keeps flipping back. Water is spraying everywhere and I can't see for shit since I am blind as a bat without my glasses plus I have a face full of water. I turn the water off and jump out and look at the shower head and the fucker looks like it has been shorn right off at the pipe. Holy shit! How did this happen?

I am dripping wet and shivering and can't take a shower now so I look at the bathtub. I can at least get clean and wash my hair, right? So I scrub out the tub, butt nekkid with my teeth chattering and start running the water and go to put the drain stop in and it won't go in! Aaaaaiiiiiiiiiii! I can't fill the fucking tub now!!! I am mad. I am cold. I am wet. What to do? I say fuck it and stuff a washcloth into the drain and kneel there in the frigging tub and stick my head under the running water and wash and condition my hair. Thankfully the tub is one of those big cast-iron beasts; those giant claw foot tubs with the porcelain over the cast iron. It weighs a ton (literally) but it keeps the heat in rather well (thank you Victorians). The tub is original to the house, and the house is over a 100 years old. I managed to wash my hair and my bod but shaving my legs and pussy is just gonna have to wait till tonight, I was too damn cold. Fuck. I HATE stubble on my legs & puss. Hubby is gonna have to go to Home Depot tonight after work and fix this mess. This is the day I could have used a nice House Bitch, seriously. Someone to wash my hair for me and soap me down instead of me with my ass in the air and my head under a drainspout. I can only imagine how ridiculous and undignified I looked. I am grateful that only the cat & kittens were there to witness my indignity.

Talk about adventures in bathing....who would have thought a simple shower could cause so much drama...damn...

Puurrs to all,

Currently listening to: Orbital "The Saint"

Feeling kind of blue today, just not terribly cheerful. The weather is turning and my knees are killing me so rain is coming. I also have a headache and my neck is killing me. I am just falling apart lol! I walked outside to feed the outside cats and it was windy and all kinds of gray and gloomy. Makes me want to scamper back in the house and crawl back into bed. Not likely, though. *sigh*

We put away all the Christmas decos last night. My house looks so bare now. I always think my house looks best during the holidays but now it just looks so plain. The only thing left up is the tree (sans ornaments) as hubby will need to take it apart and box it up. It is hella heavy and the box is taller than me, so that is his job. Hopefully he will do that tonight; it looks pretty silly to have a bare Christmas tree just sitting in a corner of the living room.

For those of you interested the kittens are doing very well. The stats are: 2 boys (1 black & white, 1 red & white) , 2 girls (1 black & white, 1 Mi-ke). All are high-white just like I like them (minimal color in proportion to white) and 3 of them are looking to be show quality. That will be determined fully much later as these kittens are out of a female who is from Japanese import lines and they are very late-maturing. I am happy to say that Nabiki has blossomed into "Mother Of The Year" and the babies seem to be thriving. All gained weight as of weigh-in last night so I am pleased. They are only a couple days old yet so I must watch them carefully as if anything were to happen it would be in the first couple weeks. That is fine, I am prepared. I have my scales and IV rigs and my tube feeding supplies ready to go if needed. I hope none of that will be required, but one can never be too safe.

I had a very weird dream last night. It was the second night I had it, too. I dreamed I was eating an enormous cheese steak, with extra cheese; all drippy and gooey. Goddamn it was good. I know this is because of the fact that I am back to dieting again. Pretty sad huh? dreaming about food? I am at that point where I am thinking about food constantly and it is making me really bummed out and cranky. I was good though, this morning. Fixed my son his waffles and made myself some lovely 100 calorie oatmeal. No butter or syrup for me (really big sigh) and now I am having some tea. Of course what I really would like is eggs benedict and a shitload of hash browns, but can't be having that. Fucking-A trying to lose weight sucks.

I guess I should get ready and head to the gym. It's 10:30 so I need to go exercise like a good girl. Have a good Thursday peeps and will someone PLEASE go eat a cheese steak for me? Make it a good one. I want someone to enjoy it eventhough I can't.

Puurrs to all,

Currently listening to: Matthew Sweet "Girlfriend"

I had a serious 'blonde moment' today.

I had my entire day planned down to the minute, I was feeling quite pleased with myself and went to get ready to leave for the gym.

Can't find my car keys.

Anywhere.

Till I happen to go peer into the windows of hubby's car and there they are! They had fallen out of my purse yesterday, I guess. Can't get to them because the car is LOCKED.

I am stuck. Dead in the water. I had my hubby's car, no less and it doesn't have keyless entry like mine does. Mine was back in the shop (they forgot to clamp a hose on so that is why it went haywire). I couldn't go anywhere or do anything without my keys and of course my husband doesn't have any spare keys for his car. Wait...he DOES but it is in HIS wallet. What a fanfuckingtastic place for it! And of course he is up the peninsula at a client so I had to wait for him to be done so he could come home and let me into his car to retrieve my keys so I could go on about my day. So this setback in time trashed my plans for the day. I did get to go to the gym but only had time to make and eat lunch and shower when I got home before needing to leave to take my son to the tutor. No shopping for me. Bummer.

Puurrs to all,

Currently listening to: James "Say Something"

Well it's back to reality for my husband and partially for my son. Hubby is back at work today after a week off and our son starts back with the math tutor today. He won't go back to school till the 7th, but he has to keep up with his tutoring schedule. Me? I never worry about reality. Reality is overrated. I never get time off anyhow so I have no change from day to day, it all blends in when you are 'at home.'

The kittens are doing well, haven't weighed them yet but all look good. Nabiki is a stellar mom, miles above her own mother who was so over motherhood right after she gave birth. Sasha gave me some nice babies but she was a shite mom. She didn't do jack, I had to do it all. I am a little worried that Nabiki might be too good of a mom; she hasn't left her kittens to eat, drink or potty. I put everything right by her so she wouldn't have to go but 2 steps, but she won't leave her babies for a minute. Talk about the polar opposite of her own mother. Thank gawd the crappy mothering trait was bred out. I called my friend Megan who owns the stud who fathered this litter and she is coming out for a show this weekend so she will come visit her new grandkits and spend some time with me. She lives in Oregon so we only really get to see each other at cat shows and I haven't seen her since I sent Nabiki off with her for breeding. She is a super nice person, one of the last true kind people. I wish I could be half as "good" as her.

I will try and get some more pics of the babies tonight, nothing like inflicting you all with my insanity - yeah I am a crazy cat lady - I admit it!!! This is my world; the world of breeding and showing pedigreed cats. It is my other hobby (besides hanging around on a porn site. Heh).

Alas I must get my ass in gear...I need to get to the gym and Childcare opens there at 10am so I can get an hours workout in (gotta do something with my flabulous self, it's a train wreck) and then if I can come home and shower and make myself presentable I can maybe run to the mall to get some shopping done before heading to the math tutor. We shall see if I can be that efficient...

Puurrs to all,

Currently listening to: Transplants "Gangsters And Thugs"

Ok here is the pic, hubby took it now instead of waiting till tomorrow.

The latest arrivals at my cattery -


Nabiki and her litter, born today 01/01/08

My girl finally got down to bidness and gave birth to New Years babies!!! 4 little bobtail babies. I will post pics of the new family here tomorrow. Right now I need to get up and walk around some, been sitting with her for hours and my legs and my ass are numb lol.

Puurrs to all,


Currently listening to: The hum of my hard drive

I had an interesting night last night.

We have this neighbor next door. I loathe him, I truly do. My biggest fantasy in life is to win the Lotto and do a hostile take-over on his house; offer him some obscene amount of money to sell up and get out of my life. Ever have a neighbor like that?

His trashy family came to visit (the yearly migration) and these people bring themselves, their litter of ill-behaved children, and the pack of yowling dogs. All crammed into a clapped out van.

I spent the evening being treated to the sounds of children hacking at pieces of wood in his backyard and then setting them on fire. I guess for some folk fire is a good plaything for kids; it's cheap, it's plentiful, it travels well, etc. Keeps the kiddos amused for hours.

Then there were the dogs. It was fucking COLD last night. Seriously. These people drag their poor dogs with them and then leave them out in the cold all night. The dogs are very unhappy and then bark. All. Fricking. Day. And. Night. They do not stop. They bark. They howl. Constantly. Our houses are very close and our bedroom is right next to his backyard and the barking dogs. How did I go to sleep this morning? To the sounds of barking dogs. How did I wake up later this morning? To the sounds of barking dogs. How inconsiderate can one be to not be aware that your damn dogs are annoying people? WTF???

Oh I almost forgot. The puking. Yeah. Puking.

That-Asshole-next-door's (my pet name for him) party was winding up at about 1:00am and so we are in our master bathroom sitting with my preggo girl (who still didn't deliver, dammit) and we hear someone start to vomit. I mean really tossing it up. It sounds like they are puking ON our damn house! It goes on and on. How much booze and Fritos did this person consume to hurl that much? Whoever was tossing up was also female, not that it matters, but there is something so pathetic about some chick vomiting all over someone's house. I had heard her laughing and screaming and carrying on all night. Guess she was the life of the party. Not no more. She spent a good 20 minutes sicking-up in a most loud and spectacular fashion, accompanied by the barking dogs. This is what I heard while trying to sleep:

Stupid drunk girl: "BLLLLLlaaaaRRRRRGH! COUGH COUGH! URRRRRGGGHHaahahhmmmmmwwwssshhh. COUGH COUGH!"

Barking dogs: "WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF!"

Stupid drunk girl: "UUUUURRRRAAAAAARRRRGh! URRRAAAAARRRRGH! COUGH! BLLLLlEEEERRRAAAARGHHHHH! COUGH!"

Barking dogs: "WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF!"


It was like dueling banjos, except substitute banjos for dogs and puke. It went on and on. And finally when I thought it was over it starts up again. What a night....

Puurrs to all,

Currently listening to: Barking dogs