clittylicker's Blog - page 20

A lovely poem written many years ago about Australia - we all had to learn it at school:


My Country by Dorothea Mackeller
My Country

I love a sunburnt country,
A land of sweeping plains,
Of ragged mountain ranges,
Of droughts and flooding rains.
I love her far horizons,
I love her jewel-sea,
Her beauty and her terror
The wide brown land for me!

The stark white ring-barked forests,
All tragic to the moon,
The sapphire-misted mountains,
The hot gold hush of noon,
Green tangle of the brushes
Where lithe lianas coil,
And orchids deck the tree-tops,
And ferns the warm dark soil.

Core of my heart, my country!
Her pitiless blue sky,
When, sick at heart, around us
We see the cattle die
But then the grey clouds gather,
And we can bless again
The drumming of an army,
The steady soaking rain.

Core of my heart, my country!
Land of the rainbow gold,
For flood and fire and famine
She pays us back threefold.
Over the thirsty paddocks,
Watch, after many days,
The filmy veil of greenness
That thickens as we gaze ...

An opal-hearted country,
A wilful, lavish land
All you who have not loved her,
You will not understand
though Earth holds many splendours,
Wherever I may die,
I know to what brown country
My homing thoughts will fly.

There ya go d_ash!! Woohoo!!

RALPH AND EDNA.

The love story of Ralph and Edna:-

Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital.

One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.

Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out.

When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.

When she went to tell Edna the news she said, 'Edna, I have good news and bad news.

The good news is you're being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love. I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness. The bad news is, Ralph, hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead.

Edna replied, He didn't hang himself - I put him there to dry.

How soon can I go home?

Hi there!! Just checked into my Kuala Lumpur hotel. Look what I found in the bathroom! Ever had a jet of cold water shot up yr jacksie? Brrrrr, you'd think they would use warm water wouldn't ya? Who wants to cum play?

Well, here it is guys, everybody in chat wanted to know their birth symbol. Remember tho, it goes by the Chinese year, which is slightly different to the Western year.

It's bread, that's what does it.

I gave up eating bread a week ago and I've managed to lose 3 kg already!! Woohoo! I only ate brown bread anyway, but even that seemed to pile on the weight.

I read somewhere recently that beer makes u fat, so I gave up reading, but giving up bread actually works!!

/me floats lightly & delicately out of the room. Hahahahaha

Yep, dogs really love popcorn,

I made some last night while I was slowly getting shitfaced & the bloody dog ate the whole bowl while I was at the fridge making another rum n coke!! Dog slept outside last night!!!

He didnt get the rum tho!! hahahaha

SAD NEWS

With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week.

Larry LaPrise, the man that wrote "The Hokey Kokey" died peacefully at the age of 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin.

They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started.


Shut up. You know it's funny.

A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town. A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.

"Well, it dates back to our honeymoon," explained the man. "We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon by pack mule.

We hadn't gone too far when my WIFE'S mule stumbled. "My wife quietly said, 'That's once.'

"We proceeded a little farther when the mule stumbled again. Once more my wife quietly said, 'That's twice.'

"We hadn't gone a half-mile when the mule stumbled a third time. My wife took a pistol from her pocket and shot him.

"I started to protest over her treatment of the mule when she looked at me and quietly said 'That's once.'"

So I thought I'd just share a couple pics of my front garden







Have a luvly day folks!!