So I got the shit scared out of me today when I went to church with the 'rents. I go mostly because I really want to spend as much time as I can with mom and dad, and because the Father actually does some interesting sermons.

In any case, it's almost time for the Holy Eucharist and we're all standing and everyone's singing and it's all nice and pretty and relaxing and suddenly I get REALLY queasy. Now, I'm the kind of person that would rather be in extreme physical pain that throw up, because I HATE throwing up, and all I can think of is how much I will hate it if I've gotten the stomach flu suddenly. Well my stomach starts to really, really hard and I'm getting incredibly dizzy. So I sit down. Mom looks at me concerned and asks if I'm okay and I tell her I'm dizzy and don't feel good.

She asks if I want some water and I say yes, we get up holding hands (cause we hold hands most everywhere we go, we're just a holdy-hand family). Next thing I know my vision's getting really dark around the edges, my left ear feels like it's getting full and I can't hear anymore, my bladder feels warm and I just wanna piss. My lips start tingling and suddenly I can't support my own weight. So mom instead of taking me to the water fountain sits me down on a bench near it and I can't keep my eyes open because all I see is tunnel vision anyway and I'm burning up suddenly. I get clammy and pale and I can't hold my head or hands up anymore.

We sat for a while and after a few minutes I started feeling a little bit better and I could breath normal and hear again. I tell mom jokingly that's God's way of saying he doesn't want a Pagan in the church and she said it was more like Satan's way of telling me I don't need to listen to anything said in there. I figure if that was the case, fine, why not? Lmao.

Anyway, we went back into the church near the end of the Holy Eucharist and everything settled down some. The rest of the day went by fine except a few bouts of dizziness and moments of weakness. =/ I've got a doctor's appointment tomorrow anyway, so we're definitely bringing it up with her. Dad suggested it could be because I didn't have breakfast, but that doesn't make sense because my diet back in college was even less than it is now and I never had a problem, and there have been PLENTY of days where I went breakfast-less, so I'm really not comfortable with that theory.

But we'll figure maybe it's a scary fluke, or religious sign. Lol, in any case, I just hope it doesn't happen again.

Any colleges in Europe that have good psychology programs? I'm having a bitching time trying to find some. =/

So I've started scrapbooking and it's just the mind numbing activity I've needed. Or mind numbing enough at least. I've already gotten about three or four pages done, though it's nothing fancy since I could only afford a book and some extra pages, none of those fancy scissors or lettering. It's not a big deal, not really.

I spent New Year's with Kricket and Dum, and it was a good night, just being able to sit up with sissy until midnight and drink wine and watch Fight Club. I think I needed that alone girly time with her, being able to talk about guys and my ideas on me and relationships and talk about school and family and compare and contrast each others feet (that one came about after a few drinks). It was nice.

I'm at an awkward stage now where I'm so happy to be home and I just want to hide in the house and never leave and I'm perfectly happy to do so, but I'm also actually missing college a bit. Not the old useless roommate, but I miss some of that freedom, even if it was a little lonely at times. I miss my daily walks to and from the parking garage or around town, I miss the church bells ringing, I miss the evenings of sitting in the student center with a hot coco and writing, I miss my evening chats with Cat and signing with her about how stupid people are.

I just hope this upcoming year in the dorm with the new roomies will work out better. This summer I wont be taking college classes, I really can't afford it, so I'll come home and work for the summer and get some money in my pocket again. Hopefully I'll be able to do the same this upcoming semester, with more time to work now.

Anywho, new years wise, I don't have much in mind. I still wouldn't mind a relationship but I really don't see it happening. I think my only real goal is to just continue to pass college and finish it up soon as possible.

In my free time, I just wanna relax. And right now, I just wanna go to bed. x.x

So I've been working on coloring this for the past two days straight and my eyes are killing me by now. Still not perfect, but I think it turned out pretty good for my first full on picture.

From left to right (best I can do), Jezebeth, Aluriel (angel), Natas, Beelzebub, Zagam (green hair), Uphir (guy in blue pjs), Mabel (girl with blue top), Dagon (fat short guy with cookies), Murmur, Vetis.

This is a full group picture from the Demon Comic my friend Ash and I did in our sophomore year of high school. We're trying to redo it now, but this is just an older picture I did for fun. I was digging through my old artbooks and found it, so decided to recolor. =)

It seems I (hopefully) left my camera back in my new dorm room, at least that's what I'm crossing my fingers I did. I had been planning to possibly take more new pictures here in the quiet and safety of my own room, but without a camera that's not going to work. We'll see what happens, hm?

I had also been planning to finally play with my new toy already, gosh darn it, but the catch about this house is that it seems to drain the energy from people. I get here and I'm instantly tired all the time. What's more, my dad does NOT understand the idea that 'if my bedroom door is closed, I want to be undisturbed.' Nothing quite as awkward as your dad walking in on you in the middle of you diddling yourself. Bleh. So I would really have to wait for him to go to bed, but my father stays up surprisingly late for an older guy. He would strike you as an 8 pm or 9 pm sort of fellow and generally he's up until 10 or 11 at night, which is great, but I'M already tired and if I'm staying up for a little bit of solo fun, by the time he's actually gone off to bed and I can get to it, I'm ready for sleep myself.

It's all one big irony.

Today has been REALLY good though. Mom woke me up and asked if I wanted to go to church with them. My parents are Catholic, and while I'm leaning toward alternative faiths, I think all religions are beautiful and I really want to spend as much time as I can with them. So we went to church together and it was a good sermon and really peaceful and all that jazz. We went to lunch afterward, then mom was super nice and got me a nice wallet and new purse, because she was in a spending mood. We also stopped at Lowes to get something for the bunk bed in my room, so I have somewhere to put things like... oh... an alarm clock =)

Then the rents surprised the fuck out of me by taking me to Best Buy and getting me a scanner/printer. I told them I had wanted to go looking, but I just wanted a small cheapo portable scanner. I've seen them for 40 or so dollars and that's in my poor-ass range. Well they decided that if I'm going to get something, may as well get it all, so I now have a new scanner and printer for college. Nice, but I feel like shit not being able to pay them back or anything.

I don't want them to think I'm coming home because I get free stuff out of it. I mean, yes, it's nice, sometimes a relief, but that's not WHY I'm coming home, it's because I miss them (and the food is good =3). They always say they'll stop when I'm out of college, but I think the awful fact is the knowledge that I'm spoiled enough that if I point at something and ask for it nicely, I'll probably get it. I hate that. I hate being spoiled, because I always get that kind of raised brow from kricket (whether she knows she does it or not) and it just bugs me to be so similar to these spoiled little brats.

It just gets to me =/ Blah.

Was quite loverly. The wait for Kricket and Dum to show up was tedious as all get out, but mom and I ended up tabbing her Bible together and just talking about our opinions and some of the stories and she told me about her religious history, and it was actually quite nice to talk to her about it and not debate. I hope we can do that at tea together.

Present wise =3 all vurrry good. I got nice usable items, which is really the stuff I love best. Dum said mom and dad went too far, especially over him, and they did get him some nice stuff. But the catch is that they LIKE Dum, and they always go overboard every year.

After an excellent supper (15 bean soup dad did wonderfully on) Dum went out and talked with mom and dad about his surprise for sissy. That night we talked about our opinion of Dum's surprise and random odds and ins.

All around it was a wonderful day =) I'm so glad to just be home.

Thank goodness.

But the going home story is for the next blog, I'm typing up THIS one before I forget all the juicy details. So let's all pretend this is 'Repo! The Genetic Opera' blog!

Ash and I decided to get ready and leave around 6, getting dressed up all nice-like and spending 15 minutes putting on make up only to realize we're not all that good at make up. I gave up when I tried putting on eye shadow and looked more like I had gotten black eyes. Ash gave up when she tried putting on lipstick. So we stuck with basic mascara and eye liner and put on some cute earings and clothes and left. The drive to Jacksonville to and hour and involved a lot of loud singing.

We arrive in Jacksonville and find the theater (one of those old-timey ones that you might have seen in the fifties or something). We go in and get our tickets, the only two left for that showing, and then get in the car. It was dark out by that time so we figure we would go find a Starbucks and hang out. We find a Starbucks in my TomTom and it says one's not far away. Hurrah! We turn right down a dark street and drive around. Then there's a part of the street that goes straight and one that turns off then back on, like a crescent moon off the street we're already driving down, one that let's people get into their drive ways easier I guess. TomTom has us go down that, take another right, and suddenly we're back on the SAME road and we find out the Starbucks is basically a one minutes walk from the theater.

Wow...

So we get out drinks and sit and talk for about thirty minutes, then realize we're going to get so bored.

My train of thought: "Hrm... one hour...then one hours...then one more hours...then at 11 seat..."

Lightly I say: "Well...Ash. How about we go BACK to St. Augustine, hang out for an hour and then drive back to St. Augustine so we can get some good seats around 11 to 11:30"

"Okay!"

So we drive BACK to St. Augustine and hang out at Target for a bit and then Barnes and Nobles look at a Sport's Illustrated day planned and pointing out the photoshopped parts of the pictures. FINALLY it's 10 and we drive to Jacksonville again and arrive at 11. We ask the people at the theater when we can seat and they say not until 11:30 or later.

Oki... so we sit outside! =D Then people start showing up for the movie and it's such a wide range. There's people dressed in all black and some very large woman in heavy make up wearing a cape (yeah... a cape), and there's one chick and her boyfriend (I think it was a boy >.>; Ash and I argued over that actually) and both are in blacckkk and she's dressed even more inappropriately for the weather than I am (my shirt showed a little more skin than I generally show in public). Then there's adults in their 40's or older actually dressed NICELY in nice shirts and pants. Golly... I don't know what kind of movie I'm going to see. Rock opera or a straight up opera.

We get into the movie and I find out it's both =3

Repo! The Genetic Opera was FANTASTIC. The music was wonderful, the plot actually good and the acting powerful. I was so impressed. I had been expecting this movie to be a cult classic in the way Rocky Horror was, bad to the point of being good. This movie is just straight up good. You could also see a lot of rituals popping up. The same way certain actions took place in certain spots in Rocky Horror (screaming 'slut!' when Janet showed up or when the detective or whoever he was said 'I would like, if I may...' people yelled 'you may not!') are also starting to slowly show up in Repo! Whenever Zydrate was mentioned the audience would wave blue glow sticks and there was a few points when people would yell along with the character Luigi Pavi.

I think my favorite was from the song 'Mark It Up.' Pavi was teasing his elder brother, Luigi, after their sister, Amber Sweet had kneed him in the groin. Pavi sang:

"My brother and sister should fuck."

And Luigi just yells at the top of his lungs: "PAVI! SHUT THE FUCK UP!" and everyone in the theater yelled it all together.

Anyway, the movie was a blast and I can NOT wait until it's on DVD. =3 I'm so happeh.

Tomorrow will be a blog on the trip, so ya'll can hear about the gas station from hell.

Oodles of love!

Well we made it to St. Augustine alive, though it took us long enough. Ash is a slow as all get out driver so I would be doing my own thing and look up and see she's practically 10 car lengths behind me and people are swerving in and out in front of her. Oi.

So we got to the hotel, paid, and I went and got my check and had a big thing at work about making sure I work. I called my assistant manager and made sure he knew I had to work on a certain date or else I would be 'administratively separated' again. Lame. But when I get there to see what I'm working, I'm not down at all. So I got the administrative coordinator since I didn't want to bug my managers and explain the whole story to her. Out of town, can't work, need to work tomorrow, gotta leave by at least 12 because of my 7 hours drive.

She says: "Well can you work 9-6?"

"... No. I HAVE to leave around 12, 7 hour drive. 'Member?"

"Well then there's nothing I can do for you."

Okay, but I HAVE to work, I MUST work, there's no 'maybe' or 'no,' there's only 'yes.' Ffs, just let me clock in then clock out for a minute so I'm at least in the system again. Well no, they just can't do that. So she calls my manager and the manager arrives and I explain my situation AGAIN and finally we get somewhere. She gives me a shift from 9 am to 11 am which is GREAT. That's plenty of time for me to sleep after the movie tonight, get two dinky hours in, Ash doesn't wait long and then we can go with plenty of time to spare.

Praise the gods. I apologize for always being such a hassle and she says it's not a big deal or something along those lines.

Now Ash and I are just chilling in the hotel. I figure around 7 we'll start getting ready for the movie. We're actually going to dress nice and fun for this and even put on make up. Holy shit, right? Then around 8 or so we'll leave for Jacksonville, find the theater, hang out somewhere until 11:15ish I guess, then try and get into the theater and get some good seats.

We're are both INSANELY excited about this, I just hope nothing gets fucked up. The guy over the phone (owner of the theater I think) promised to save us two tickets for today since we were in Orlando and were so far away. I just hope they actually saved, and if not that at least there's enough tickets left over for us to buy two.

I figure this theatre is either going to be dead, or packed. I don't see much of an inbetween.

We both had a really tense moment yesterday that's luckily blown over by now, but it was pretty awkward for a few hours. The day had started off fine with oodles of laughing and happiness. But when she started working on her final she got a little stressed and we still needed to go get food for supper, so we go to get the food and on the way we're talking about this Transformers fanfic I had written back during my junior year of high school and how I should finish it. So I was re-pitching the ending idea to her (I had pitched it once before to her about a year ago) and she's no longer happy with it because it's a happy ending so she's pitching a whole different idea that ends very tragically and it's like 'no... because that's just not how I want it.' So then she's getting a little huffy because I want to write some stupid happy ending and I'm getting in a tiff because she USED to like the happy ending, wtf?

So we're both getting mad over something fucking STUPID because I'm not really going to finish this fanfic ANYWAY. O.M.G.

So she kind of apologizes, she didn't mean to get me upset and she wasn't trying to, and starts talking about how recently she just doesn't like happy endings in things. She says she feels their plight and their troubles when there are troubles for couples in stories, but when things turn out fine in the end, it just pisses her off. So I mentioned it could be because he relationship's getting a little bit shitty.

Probably not the best way to phrase it but all I could think of. I mean, based on what she's said his parents gave him the option of leaving now with his inheritance and not dealing with them again so he could go be with Ash and be a man and start life like a fucking adult, OR he could stay for two years, get double his inheritance (like 2 million dollars or something, his parents are disgustingly rich) and all he had to do was obey them for two years and not see her at all.

And he chose the money. Maybe financially the smart thing to do but seriously, he just put a price on their relationship and personally I think he needs to try acting like a fucking 20 year old already and stop living off mommy and daddy.

So, sounds SHITTY to me, but whatever. When then she gets a little upset and I'm a little upset and we're both upset over something stupid again. We go to the store and they don't have the food we want and she starts talking to me like I'm fucking 5 which is PISSING me off because she needs to treat me like a god damned adult if I'm going to treat her the same way.

So by the end of the night neither of us were happy with each other. She had class at 1 in the morning and wanted me to drive her there and pick me up and I sure as hell didn't because I wasn't feeling good and I was god damned tired too. So I ended up sleeping through when I was supposed to take her to class and she's a little miffed again.

Anyway, she came back from her second class at 9 and I was already up and things just chilled out suddenly. We had a tiny 'wtf bitch?' minus the foul language where we both explained our moods last night and then suddenly we're laughing and having a good time again. Thank goodness.

We went out for lunch and we're having a good time, wandered around the mall a little, tried on clothes and I talked her into trying on some dominatrix outfit at Hot Topic, which looked damned good on her.

The theatre that's playing Repo! contacted me again and told me I can call him on Friday and buy tickets for the Saturday show, which we'll do, gosh darnit. So we're both stoked, even if it is a midnight showing, which means we'll probably be out by 2 in the morning and back in bed by 3 and I'll have to be up around 6:30 at the earliest for work, then that 6:30 hour drive back. But it's Repo! and that's the only time they're showing it right now, and we'll be following each other on the drive, so we can look out for one and other.

Right now I'm just playing with her stupid kitten, which is a lot of fun despite the fact she's tearing up my hand and wrist. Ash is taking a nap before she has to work on her final again and then I'll drive her to her 5 p.m. class and pick her up at 9 p.m., because no doubt she IS going to be too tired to drive for that and I'll be awake (hopefully) during then. I'm giving her until about 2:45 and if she's not up by then I'll wake her up, because she does want to work on the final and I don't blame her.

Tomorrow she's off, so we'll be going to some big fancy mall that's too expensive for either of us, then Saturday she'll have her one class in the morning and we're packing up and getting the fuck out of here.

Then home. =D How I do miss it.

So a few months ago I saw the preview for a movie called 'Repo! The Genetic Opera' and I was so excited because it looked awesome. Well I forgot about it because I hadn't heard any more, then while staying at Ash's I remember it and we looked it up.

I was already hooked, I invariably got her hooked to because that's what best friends do.
Ash: "We share our addictions =D"

Now can someone answer me this: WHY?! WHY WHY WHY WHY WHHYYYYY?! Is it that Repo is being treated like one of those 'artsy' films that only play in special theaters?! Not fair! We saw it was finally playing in Jacksonville and were all geeked up to go see it while we were in town, because it was playing the night before we had to leave for home, but the site doesn't even say HOW we go about getting tickets. Annoying much.

We just called the theatre and I just left and email because for some reason these dumb bastards aren't open on a Wednesday (seriously, what the fuck?), and hopefully they'll respond.

So wish us luck and in the mean time we'll act like moronic screaming fangirls because the GraveRobber is far too hot for his own good.