right.....so in theory dum should be pulling out his driveway in 5 hours. but there's so much he still has to do, and he's been doing it all himself, that it's entirely possible he won't leave till mid-morning tomarrow.

and i go into super-worry mode. he hasn't slept well at ALL the past few days... he didn't get to sleep tonight till super-late.

he has it in his mind that if he doesn't leave TODAY, then every bad thing and every doubt quite a few people on here have expressed is true. i tell him that our FRIENDS, are the only ones who count....and some of you truly get it.... especially meanie...Mean&Evil1:
Dummy will have to do nothing more than simply follow his heart, which you hold in the palm of your hand. Safe passage, Dummy. May your homecoming bring nothing but joy and contentment. Love one another. Hold one another. Protect one another. Never miss an opportunity to look each other in the eye and smile.

i love reading that comment. because meanie get's that this isn't a visit....dummy's coming HOME. albeit to a home he's never been in before...

*smiles* but it will be our home.

still......from the time he leaves his driveway, until the time he pulls into ours...i'm going to be a nervous wreck......

think he'll get the hint?





2 days!!!

so i overselpt, and since i can't be late anymore this quarter, i called in. been working hard as hell this week and i still have so much to do in prep for dummy's arrival saturday. so i loafed on the couch for a bit, took a short nap...

didn't PLAN for a short nap. but it was...cuz the phone rang. picked it up, and some dude was speaking to me in a completely foreign language. i think it was maybe yiddish or something? cuz he'd talk and talk, then i heard (in english) "reverse the charges" .but it sounded like the old jewish guys that used to come into the coffee shop i worked at. the entire time i'm asking who it is, and telling them i don't understand. so i hang up. the phone rings a few seconds later, and it's the same dude, speaking in the same language. i tell him again that i don't understand what he's saying and asking who he is. he just keeps jabbering on...so i hung up again, *69, no number available.

finally fell back asleep and had a dream that woke me up. i don't remember it all, but the part that i did remember was me sitting down in front of some strange woman. in my living room, and her cutting off my hair with a huge pair of scissors. i remember looking in the mirror thinking VB's not gonna like this... ???

so yea...i've just had an odd feeling about me all day. feels like something isn't quite right.....

4,000 dead...and the many of their family's asking Prez Bush to NOT let their lives be in vain.

if you can't support the war, support the soldiers.




i accidentally deleted the last post, trying to edit it...

wanted to say go to

[url]http://www.americasupportsyou.mil[/url]

they DO see it, and the DO appreciate that we've not forgotten them....

i've been away more often than not. which is unusual for me. it's been busier @ work than we expected. as a matter of fact.....with NO "manager" just me....we've made our best profits with our least amount of loss EVER. IN THE STORES HISTORY. ...but i'm not ready to run my own bakery...pffffft

then again....lest i get ma hopes up. but it's all around the company..that since a bakery manager stepped down @ her store, retired.....there's ANOTHER opening. at a store MUCH busier than mine. actually one of the top stores in the district. i've heard from a few different people that i'm gonna get THAT store. 1.OMG BUSY.....all the time 2.OMG BETTER BONUS'...... 3.30 mins away from ma house!!! all i can do is cross my fingers and pray. it would be a HUGE promotion. closer to home, and triple the bonus' i get now.

on the other hand. today was my first day with my new boss. she is the kind of no-bullshit, ass kicking chick i like to work with. i think she micro manages way too much, (writing on each box EXACTLY how much you take out)but maybe that will be a GREAT thing.......maybe i'll start doing it.

today we did almost $4,000. a record for my bakery. and III did it.......with a crew who worked they're asses off.........but it was me managing, me ordering, ME.


.....and he says i'm not ready to have my own shop...

other chick came in today. she starts saturday. as my manager.

*heavy sigh* ok, so she HAS been an asst. about 6 months longer than i have.

BUT......found out today....that she has NO idea how to do paperwork. i'll have to train her on that.

in other news...

star will be down friday, and even tho i'm working funky hours, can't wait to meet her.
knobs is down soon after..and can't wait to meet HIM either.

aaaaaaand.... DUMMY IS DOWN IN 9 DAYS!!!!!single digits!!!!!! whooooooohoooooooooo!!!! soon, no more goodbyes, no more late night phone conversations, no more countdowns. just me...and him...our animals, one big happy dysfunctional family.


mmmmmmmm.....sex on demand......and real food!! stuff that dosn't come out of the little window after shouting at the magic talking box.

....and sex on demand!.....

ooooOOOoo.....and a personal photographer! ya'll think i post alot now! wait till i don't have to spend an hour taking 6 pictures!!!!!

.....and guess what?!? SEX.....ON.........DEMAND!!! muwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha

poor dum better rest up now

well......it isn't completely official yet..but i have my sources. and they say that i'm not going anywhere. not getting the promotion either. the other lady on the finalist list should be starting @ my store as my boss the day before easter.....

it wouldn't be so damn bad, but for the fact that ma boss, evil fuckin incarnate, has been smiling at me for the past two days. nice even. fucker's gloating cuz he knew without a good word from HIM, my chances were pretty much zero from the get go. and ya'll KNOW he wasn't about to say something GOOD about me. so i'm drowning my sorrows, and i'm about to go take some pictures. but i dedicate this to him....courtesy of five finger death punch, my flavor of the week band:

You want it, you got it
Everything you needed and more
You said it, I heard it
Careful what you wish for
Deleted, defeated everything you've ever been
No mercy, it's the way of the fist

Strapped with rage, got no patience for victims
Sick and tired of the whole fuckin' world


I don't remember asking you about your imperfections
You might win one battle
But know this, I'll win the fucking war!

End of the goddamn road! (Right!)

Step to me, step to me motherfucker
Zip your lip, you've run out of time
Step to me, step to me motherfucker
Talk the talk, now walk the damn line


Deserve it, you earned it, got yourself a fuckin' war
Believe it, you need it, face down on the fuckin' floor
I hate it, can't take it
Wanna break your fuckin' bones
No mercy, you fucker
Should've left it all alone


Strapped with rage, got no patience for victims
Sick and tired of the whole fuckin' world


I don't remember asking you about your imperfections
You might win one battle
But know this, I'll win the fucking war!

As you crash and burn
1, 2, fuck you! (Right!)

Step to me, step to me motherfucker
Zip your lip, you've run out of time
Step to me, step to me motherfucker
Talk the talk, now walk the damn line!
Step to me, step to me motherfucker
Shut your face, it's your turn to die
Step to me, step to me motherfucker
Talk the shit, your ass is mine!


I don't remember asking you about your imperfections
You might win one battle
But know this, I'LL WIN THE FUCKING WAR!!!!!

Waaaaaaaay too much to type here, but the trip was great, had a blast hanging out with my sister. works...work. still no word about a promotion, but i'm giving them a week, if either A. i'm promoted, or B. they bring in another manager,dosn't happen i'm stepping down to full time. i WON'T manage an entire bakery on an asst. managers salary. call me greedy. just ain't gonna happen.

in other news.... i found this pic at my mom's house. me with short hair. i was almost speachless when i saw it, as i think it's quite possibly my favorite picture ever taken of myself. and usually i hate face pics. figured i'd share. it's LITERALLY a picture of a photograph, but i'm impatient and didn't wanna wait till my mom got around to scanning it. so imagine it sharper

about 5 years ago, i came home from work to find my (then) husband and some long haired, lanky boy sitting at the computer together, debating the pros and cons of a certain program.

i didn't really think anything of it, my ex was always bringing home strays... but he stayed the night, and the next night when i got home, he was still there.

he was funny, in an off hand, computer geek way. he made me play RPG games with both of them, always sure to include me.

so he stayed at our house, then we stayed at his, then him back at ours...he became an unofficial roommate. then we decided that since his place was closer to my work, we'd move in with him and split the bills.

he would drive me to work somtimes, or pick me up, and we'd listen to NPR or talk radio and sit in the car arguing politics or ethics in our driveway for hours....

when the ex decided he wanted to move to his hometown of detroit, our friend offered to drive us there. so the three of us, plus our dog (a great dane/pitbull mix) AND his dog (an alaskan malamute) AND our most prized worldly possessions were crammed in a GEO METRO, from florida to michigan. i was sad to leave my homestate, my parents and sister...
i had this snow globe, that played "country roads" that i wanted to take with me, but there was literally NO room. that song always reminded me of home....
about half way to michigan, we were at a rest stop, letting the dogs (and humans) stretch their legs, when he turned to me and asked "are you homesick yet?" i told him i kinda was.. and he pulled out a wierd looking key, giving it to me. i asked him what it was...
then he gave me the second piece. he had broken the snow globe, and kept the music box inside. i had the song with me, still have it today.

we didn't talk much after he dropped us off, a few phone calls, e-mails often. he moved to seattle and got a job with microsoft. ever the computer geek....

the last time i'd talked to him, he was soOOOoo excited. he'd just bought himself a new honda sportbike. paid cash. he'd taken lessons, gotten all the proper equipment, ever the responsible one, he wouldn't even ride it in the parking lot until his instructor told him he was ready.

my ex left me a voicemail tonight. my friend...computer geek...late night sounding board...official designated debate opponent...was hit while riding his sportbike yesterday. he did not live.

it's always a shock when someone you know dies. especially someone young enough that you couldn't imagine them being gone for a long time.. i'm not quite sure where i'm going with this now.

i'll miss him terribly, and always remember a sweet boy who broke a snowglobe, so his friend could take a piece of memory with her wherever she went...

goodbye jared.

"Country Roads, take me home,
To the place I belong:
West Virginia, mountain momma,
Take me home, country roads."

ok..........so i need a vote. i seriously wanna do my normal thing. when ma HEAD hair touches my ass, i wanna shave it....not bald, mind you, 1 1/2 inches or more left....


i donate all hair to locks of love, so it's not going in the trash or anything, but.......what do you think? shave it? or keep it as is? there is NO in between for me........


**EDIT** good question MD, took me 'bout 4 years to grow this mane since last time i shaved ma head for locks of love....