mortadella5553's Blog - page 6

"Charlie Wilsons War" great movie, my favorite this year! ( THIS year, haha)
Been away for a day or so, some insensitive goings on in the forums I see
Come on boys- do NOT drive the women away, don't you know what side of the bread the butter is on?
Also men, when a man fucks up, don't support his behavior, or least ignore it. Supporting boorish behavior only puts the rest of us in a dim light. We all make a stupid joke that goes over badly from time to time, that is understandable, but continuing on with it after it is obviously in BAD taste is not acceptable. Man up, take responsibility for your own mistakes, and stop the behavior. This is not always easy to do, but it gets easier as a man grows and learns in life. This takes years, a few men never get there, don't be one of them. My best wishes to those hurt, as well as to those with an oppportunity to learn.
Sincerely, Mort.

Nice to be on vacation, but I enjoy being at work also. A unique place- I start having fun almost as soon as I walk in the door. I will miss it, (the people I work with) when I leave. I am getting transferred soon, to a place that needs some fixing, don't really want to go, but I don't have much choice, and I'm a good soldier.

TRUE story:

A man and his wife were making HOT rough love in the middle of the day when their son Timmy came home early from school. Timmy surprised them in the bedroom. Dad looks at Timmy, winks and keeps right on boinking.

After they are done, Dad put on his robe and tries to find his son to talk. After searching awhile he hears noise coming from the back bedroom. He opens the door to see Timmy on top of his grandmother, boinking away like a madman, Timmy winks and keeps right on going.

After, Timmy finds his Dad in the living room with his head hung low. Dad sees him and says "why Timmy?"



Timmy replies: It's not so fucking funny when it's YOUR mother is it?

sickkkkkkkkkkkk- sorry, I couldn't help myself

I received a Christmas ornament with the last stanza of this poem engraved on the front and Mom's name and years of live engraved on the back. Mom died on my B-day in 07, one of about almost a dozen family, friends and retired former coworkers that passed in 07. The poem and thought to find it touched everyone at the gathering.

Keep kind thoughts and rember the happy times with those who passed before you.

I still hear the songs
I still see the lights
I still feel your love
On cold wintery nights

I still share your hopes
and all of yours cares
I’ll even remind you
To please say your prayers

I just want to tell you
You still make me proud
You stand head and shoulders
Above all the crowd

Keep trying each moment
To stay in his grace
I came here before you
To help set your place

You don’t have to be perfect
All of the time
He forgives you the slip
If you continue the climb

To my family and friends
Please be thankful today
I’m still close beside you
In a new special way

I love you all dearly
Now don’t shed a tear
Cause I’m spending my
Christmas with Jesus this year.


To those who had a hard year, may 2008 be better,
And to those who had great years, may God bless you with another.

Happy New year to all, best of,Health, Love, and your own special dreams.
Mort

I thought this was gonna be a happy blog but WACHOVIA BANK did it again (earlier blog end of Nov.) I went in to settle a matured CD in my Moms estate. Did all the paperwork in november, 4 hours for me, an hours drive each way for my sister Bla bla. Today- they have NO F***ing records of anything. The AH that mishandled all the shit last time was off. No files, no computer notes. NO DICE! I say " If he gets killed in a car accident on the way to work tomorrow, does that mean you keep my money forever? Don't you have records? Your a BAKNK for God's Sake! (I didn't really say God's sake- no lightning please). They gave me a check made out to the original Trust account of Mom & Dad, even though they saw a coopy of the prior check made out to ME the executor, trustee, power of attorney.
Nex to wells fargo. 1 hour make the deposit YEAH! Call Sis, The check is in the mail (she could use it) when I walk in the door the phone is ringing---- Hello-this is WF bank (WTF Bank) we can't takethe check unless it goes into a trust account for Mom & Dad- You Stupid heads!!!!!! I am disolving all that shit! (I said that in a much nicer way mind you) NO DICE. So here I am, with a double Beefeater martini just chillin with my friends on NN. If you made it to the end , You are a better man than I Charlie Brown.
There I feel better now, until tomorrow when i go back to WACHOVIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ps repeat after me; I will NOT load my guns, I will not load my guns....................
pps; 1989 Barolo and leftover filet here I come!

BIG drama here- I was ordered to work Christmas day- while I'm on F***ing vacation. There are only 20-30 people with more time than me out of 1300 and they tell ME I gotta work!!!!! After Moms passing on my Bday this year, Dad's passing last year- there was NO WAY I'm coming home from the relatives (sister) to work that day. I might have burned a bridge or 2 in the process, with the top brass. I WAS very well regarded until 12/24. OH WELL! FTITCTAJ.

Also, due to someones blog reminding us to think of those absent (wish I could give proper attribution) I picked up the phone and called my longtime friends and family immediately. For the first time I beat them to the punch- I feel GOOD about that. (pussy that I am I cried a little over how little i see them) One of my bessssst friends wives was so sweet on the phone I had to get a tissue (for my eyes you perverts). I have known her & him since high school & she and I have a pact- If she becomes a widow, God forbid, and I am available- we are hooking up- we made the pact with his blessing. No swinging before hand though, that is totally out of the question, I love them both too much for that.
I feel better now.
Mort.

DANCE
As though no one is watching you

LOVE
AS though you've never been hurt before

SING
As though no one can hear you

LIVE
As though heaven is on earth

so simple, but HARD to do!

Has a foto that is funny but sorta sad too. mad me think of this old joke, I mean true story

A husband and wife were sharing a bottle of wine when the husband said, "I bet you can't tell me something that will make me feel happy and sad at the same time".

The wife thought for a few moments, then said,






Your dick's bigger than your brother's.

On the way home from church last night I thought it was 'chilly'. The sensor in the car said 46 F.
In Vermont they are saying 'I wish it would warm up to the 40's'
In Florida or S. Cal they would be saying "Man 46- it's FREEZING'
It's all in how we look at things.

The Maid wanted a pay increase. Madam was very upset about this and
asked, "Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase?"
Maria: " Well Madam, there are 3 reasons why I want an increase."
"First, I iron better than you."
Madam: "Who said you iron better than me?"
Maria, "The Master said so."
Madam: "Oh"
Maria: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."
Madam: "Nonsense, who said you are a better cook than me?"
Maria: "The Master did."
Madam: "Oh."
Maria: "My third reason is that I am a better lover than you."
Madam: ( very upset now ) "Did the Master say that as well?"
Maria: "No Madam, the gardener did."

(SHE GOT THE PAY RAISE)
those that laugh--- your naughty!

I went to 5:00PM mass tonight, to say a prayer for my Dad's kind friend who lost his wife and daughter to cancer this year (earlier blog), and to say a prayer for a special friend that they may get good news from their doctor. God bless all those still in harms way on our behalf.
PS: the Priest saw fit to stop in the asile at the end of mass and mention to me, personaly,that he was worried that the roof might fall in! EVERYBODY is a comedian! smart ass. But I feel good!