alaun's Blog - page 18

Boobs are the proof that MEN can Focus on TWO things at once....

Remember when we were Young,we couldn't wait to Grow Up,
Were we STUPID or What ????.

Forget what Hurt you in the Past,
But never Forget what it Taught you....

This Hug Coupon entitles the Bearer to a free Hug at any time.

Hugs Benefits....

Hugs are Fat free.
Sugar free.
Require no Batteries.
Huge reduce Blood pressure,Heart rate and help relieve Pain and Depression.

Hugs Make you feel good,Share one To-day....

Everyone can say "I LOVE YOU" but not everyone really means it.
So BELIEVE it when you FEEL it,not when you HEAR it....

She works 24 hours a Day.
She is a Mum.
She is an Alarm Clock.
A Cook.
A Maid.
A Teacher.
A Nanny.
A Nurse.
A Driver.
A Handyman.
A Security Officer.
A Photographer.
A Councelor.
A Comforter.
She doesn't get Holidays,Sick Pay,Days Off.She works day and night and gets paid in Hugs and Kisses....

Say yes if you LOVE your MUM.

My Internet went down yesterday. I think my Neighbor forgot to pay there Bill.How Irresponsible!!!!!!

SEX is like Air

It's not Important until you'r not Getting any......

Paddy, one of the little people, is planning to Marry,he is he is.
so he goes to the the King of the little people and asks him how he can tell if his Bride-to-be is still a Virgin.

The King says "Aye Paddy to be sure,all Irish Humans use three things for what they call a Do-it-yourself Virginity Kit....
A can of Red paint,a can of Blue paint and a Shovel".

Paddy asks"Aye to be sure,what do I do with these things oh KING".

The King of the Fairies replies,"Before ye climb into your Bed on your Wedding Night,you paint one of your balls red and the other blue",If she says"That's the strangest Pair of Balls I ever did See....!,You hit Her with the SHOVEL.....

Worry is like a Rocking Chair.
It will give you something to Do.
But it won't get you Anywhere...