beachdreamz's Blog - page 22

Just to let everyone know..what happened yesterday sucked but I am ok. I don't think complaining would do anything as she seemed to be giving the orders and was quite possibly the owner.

Thanks for all the comments and even though what she said will stick with me I know I am trying to get in shape and I am proud I am at least trying.

Everyone knows I have a very low self esteem and even though it had got a lot better recently, it doesn't take much to take it away.

I wanted to go shopping for some new lingerie tonight because I just wanted to feel sexy. I know I am not tiny so a lot of clothes just don't fit because they are made for girls with no chest. I still need to lose 20 pounds or so but I didn't think I was "huge".

So I went to this one store and a clerk asked me if I needed help so I described to her what I was looking for. She looked at me and quite bluntly told me the outfit I was showing her would be quite horrible on me and that infact...I shouldn't wear any lingerie at all because with my body I would look bad no matter what I wore.

Of course there were people (guys at that) standing around as she said this and I not only felt disgusting but quite embarassed as well. Its funny how it took me 3 months to build an ounce of self esteem and how fast its completely taken away.

I survived my first week of work (hahah a full 2 days - can every work week be 2 days????)

The commute is a bitch when you are not used to it but the job seems ok. Its not overly busy at the moment so that makes it fairly boring. It seems that I will have quite a bit of responsibility though so that makes me happy.

The best part is there is a lot of sitting (well minus getting up 15 times an hour to get faxes, etc) so I get to wear whatever shoes I want! HAHA That may not mean much but to a show lover like me it rocks!! It don't matter if they are comfy...as long as they look good!

Tomorrow begins today..I think I stole that from a VB blog entry and it fits my life exactly right now. I am making a ton of changes and in order for my tomorrow to be good I need to work on it today.

Today I looked into something I wanted forever (hah no, not sex) and found out its something I can go for. Going to take a few months but the end result is worth it. My confidence level will go up 100%

Tomorrow my new job starts. I am 50/50 on this one. I will be glad to be making money again, and feeling like I am doing something but I so dread the commute and the waking up so early. Oh to be an adult!

Next Week my gym membership will finally start getting regualr use. My plan is to be in shape by summer. Techincally it will be more like spring but I will give myself some room to mess up.

Side Note: Flat a "BOB" is a battery operated boyfriend and JP if I had known you could have taken care of the horny problem I would have said something LMAO....can you reach me from your cross country location???

I don't know what it is, maybe living in a big city with so many hot guys but I am horny all the time and its driving me crazy.
I met so many guys New Years Eve, and while I am not bragging (well ok maybe a little) I could have had pretty much my choice in guys. Just one little problem...thats not me. Unless I like someone I can't sleep with them.

I either need someone soon or a BOB!! lol (except I don't know I have the money to keep a BOB working hehe)

OHHHHHHHHHH

So hung over...akkk Vodka..champagne...tequilla (by the wine glass -not a shot glass)...peach stuff....

I think there is NO chance of me making it off the couch today.

Anyone else feel like they've been run over?

Oh hahaha--- but I did have one awesome effin time!

Woot I finally have plans for New Years. 2 friends of mine and myself rented a posh hotel room downtown toronto, are going out for a nice supper, hanging out and getting plastered! Hahah its been such a long time since I have been drunk, so I hope this is a good one. I have a ton of plans for the new year suddenly thanks to a certain phone call tonight so I need to get some fun happening because I think the first part of '07 is going to mean a lot of work.
So since I probably won't be on I want to again wish everyone a fantastic New Years and if anyone is in downtown Toronto tomorrow night come find me as I need someone to kiss. I have someone in mind but sadly he won't be close enough.

Let the party begin!

I so can't wait until 2007 comes. Some parts of 2006 were really good but there were also a lot of down points. I have decided not to dwell on the negative (at least as little as I can).

My resolution is too achieve a few things this year..one is getting fit which is already in the process of happening.

2) save as much money as I can. I need to go to alberta for my bros wedding in October and I want to have a blast

3)to be happy (or on my way there)

I hope 2006 was good to people and that 2007 is even better.

Oh dear me!

Ok so I have been having trouble with my tooth for a while now. It really didn't hurt much anymore...just every now and then it would remind me it had to be taken care of. The dentist gave me some medication to take care of it. Anyways............ I woke up to day and that side of my jaw is totally swollen. Like I look like a chipmunk on that side. My lips naturally turn down (so people always think I am mad/sad) but today I have this stupid half-grin. HAHAH I'm so passed even caring anymore. I almost find it funny. Not much else can happen I don't think...haha the rest of me is curvy so why not my face to right? Right?? LOL

Happy Boxing Day all

I got tickets to the Leafs game on Saturday! Woohoo! Unless you are a Leafs fan you won't understand the importance of this. Tickets for the Leafs sell out in minutes and getting tickets is nearly impossible unless you are paying like double/triple the price..even then its still hard. And I only paid half price! (haha I better not find out they are fake)

me bounces all around!!