I just wanted to take second to thank everyone for their support ... also to apologize for not keeping up with blogs and other things. (to be honest I've probably read them but lacked the mind to respond)

Christmas was indeed a very good holiday despite getting lost in Maine for over 3 hours, looking for my niece's house. My son was home for 2 days, yeah!!! Christmas day was started with a pleasurable catholic mass with wasband, son and roommate. My son went with his dad today so they could have some Christmas time together and he'll sleep there tonight. His father and I will talk more when they get home tonight or tomorrow.

I am cautious but optomistic that his dad and I will work this out for his benefit. This situation is really not about me or my spouse, it's about my son and his happiness and welfare. I think as long as the adults in this situation keep that fact in mind we can work this out amicably.

Have a very Merry Christmas everyone and enjoy your day.

Kitten Kringle

I just wanted to drop a brief note and thank everyone for their support during this time. I appreciate all your good wishes and prayers.
Things seem to be moving along...maybe not at the pace I would like them to but they are progressing.
My son and wasband were over for dinner this evening and everyone seemed to get along fine. No harsh words were spoken and we all comported ourselves as mature adults and even had a few laughs. My son will be over tomorrow after school and return after a get together over his cousin's house so that he can sleep here before we go to my family's Christmas get together on Saturday.
It will be nice to have him home again.

Maybe all those prayers are helping us resolve this in a manner least upsetting to my son and that's really all I want.

Today I'm not curled into a ball crying so I suppose that's a good thing.

Wasband wouldn't let my son come over yesterday. He says he's afraid I won't let him leave. So many things come to mind when I say that...maybe, he's become so cruel and different that he doesn't realize that I haven't really changed. My son would be allowed to go if he wanted to. But, that's besides the point.

He says I can visit him there. How kind...keep in mind that I never denied him access in any way, shape or form. He was allowed to take my son at any time and go wherever he wanted. I never xxxxxx him to visit under my nose. Maybe I should have.

He says I can call to talk to him but that he will not have me talking about this situation because he doesn't want him upset. Excuse me? If you didn't want him upset you would have left him where he was.

He also admitted that this was not my son's decision, it was his. He said the concern that my son had regarding having a roommate come in was that I was replacing my husband with my roommate. Of course a child would have this concern but that's not a legitimate reason to remove him from the house. He said he had a problem with a stranger moving in...he didn't know him..to which I said he had ample opportunity to meet him, he was the one who chose not to, and he was quite welcome to come over now as well. He doesn't want to. Of course not, why should he get to know someone to remove his concerns when this way he can use his ignorance for his own purposes.

He said he had a wad of cash to give to me to pay bills...but I never saw it. Nor did he ever tell me he was going to give me money to pay bills. Things may have been very different had he told me his intentions. As it was though I was left with a 1300 dollar mortgage and only 1000 to pay it.

I know that this will work out in the end but it really tears me up that he's doing this to my son. He's hurting him and apparently he doesn't care or if he does he's got some misguided notion that he's protecting him. I suppose we all need protecting from Baptist preachers and good families. I'm trying to remain civil and not start an all out war but he needs to let my son come home.

In reflecting on this I think that no matter what I would have done or when I would have done it, his actions would have been the same. He wanted to sign the papers and agree to everything as long as my son lived with him. Then he changed his mind saying that my son seemed well adjusted and happy. Now, he's used this latest event as a springboard to accomplish his desires. Who knows, with enough prayers maybe he'll have a change of heart again. If not I suppose it will be in the court's hands.

My son said he missed me last night....if that doesn't tear your heartstrings out I don't know what would.

in a gesture that was meant to be a stress reliever for me and assistance for both, old_wolf5 offered to fly me to Dallas to spend a day with his family and then help him drive back to New England. He offered to move in as my roommate because I hadn't found a job yet and my wasband was no longer giving me enough to cover my bills..not even enough for the mortgage. Before anyone gets the wrong idea, this arrangement was meant to be purely a gesture of friendship and was being kept in a platonic manner.

I had a contract for renting a room drawn up. He had his own space and rules and regulations. At no time did we intend to share a room, a bed or anything other than companionship and friendship. I talked to my son about it prior to having him move here and if he had concerns I believe I addressed them but I was under the impression that he was ok with it.

I had my mother at the house while I was gone, my neighbor over to feed the animals. I believed that I had acted responsibly. While I was gone though, my wasband came over and took my son. I came home to an empty house.

He took him out on Friday, and that night came back with a letter from his lawyer, advising that under the circumstances my son should live with him until the matter was straightened out. The matter being that I have a "stranger" moving into the "family" home. This home being the one he's no longer paying the mortgage on. The stranger being someone I probably know better than him even after 15 years of marraige. The stranger also being a person whom both my son and I met in August and then hosted in October. The fact that my wasband refused to meet him and left me before he got here on a vacation only makes him a stranger by choice.

At any rate, he has my son hostage .... will let me talk to him on the phone but he doesn't want me to talk about the situation with him (really? why not? could it be you've manipulated him as you did me for so many years?). I think I've convinced him to let him come here this afternoon but he insists that he sleep there. I have to talk to my lawyer today and I've a feeling that what he did was illegal (certainly should be anyway) or at the very least, premature.

If my son were happy there I wouldn't have a problem with it because as far as I'm concerned his happiness and well being are paramount. However, he didn't sound happy on the phone. My mother also said that he had wet eyes when his father was grabbing his things out of the house. This is his home, this is why I wanted the house. I don't need all this and all the work it involves, it was just for my son.

Sorry, for unloading but I'm not in a good place right now. I know everything will work out as it should but it doesn't make me feel much better right now.

Prayers would be appreciated.

Some of what I write today might offend some of you but then again, maybe it might just make some of you see another side of things too.

I own a farm...I have livestock. That livestock provides food and income for me.

Now, this morning, the mystery of the coyote my son thought he saw in the barn appears to have been solved. My LGD was barking her fool head off and the guineas were screeching up a storm. I looked out but didn't see anything anywhere. I started to get ready to take a shower but they didn't let up so I decided to take another look. All of a sudden a dog popped out of my coverall and then darted back in. Whoa.

I pulled on a zippered sweatshirt and went out there in my slippers...yep, in the snow in my slippers. My other dog ran out with me. He's no help by the way..all he wants to do is play. I look around the corner of the coverall and there she is....eating one of my guinea fowl chicks.

I grabbed an axe in case she was feral and decided to try to eat me. And here comes happy dog wanting to play. Actually that worked out ok because it distracted her enough so I could grab her collar...yes a collar. She had a regular nylon collar and a choke collar on. The nylon collar looked fairly new. No tags of course. I managed to grab her choke collar and started pulling her out of the coverall.

It was pretty obvious she wasn't going to bite me, thankfully, because without tags I would've had to go through shots for rabies and those are NOT fun. I put the axe down and thought about going to get a gun but I only have my shotgun and that would've made a damn mess that I didn't want to have to clean up. So, I pulled her over to the side of one of my barns and locked her in. Then I proceeded to call animal control.

Animal control was really responsive and was out to get her in about 20 minutes. I told her she wouldn't have any problem with the dog as it was fine with humans. She looked thin but had obviously been someone's pet .. if not now at least recently. I looked at her and said "you know, she's lucky I didn't shoot her." To which she replied, "you have every right to."

Listen to what I just said....let that sink in if you own a dog and you let it run free. I have every right to shoot your dog if it comes on my property and destroys my livestock. And trust me, if I had had a pistol or a rifle, it would be gone. While I feel bad for the animal itself, I also need to ensure that my livestock is not decimated by someone's pet for fun or for food if it's not being cared for properly. And if you let your dog run free....you are not caring for it properly. My dogs are either in my yard or on chains. If I have to obey laws so does everyone else. The only thing that saved that dog today was the thought of cleaning up dog brain from the inside of the coverall, bad enough I had to pick up guinea guts.

I know we still have coyotes but at least they don't come to my house to pick up their food. They tend to stay their distance as long as Cassie is outside or lights are on. Dogs on the other hand have no fear of people and therefore can wreak a lot more damage. Do us all a favor and keep your pets under control.

ranting kitty

Well, the storm abated mid afternoon on Friday leaving us with about 6 inches and drifts here and there, so a bit more in some spots, a bit less in others. My son and I went out ... he to shovel paths between the barns and pens and I to feed and water the animals. I had no where to go that evening so we opted to do the driveway the next day. Probably a good choice considering the length of my driveway.

Not thinking, I had parked my car at the very end of the driveway, behind the house. So, the next day we had no choice but to shovel the entire length of the drive. The few people who've been here have an idea of how long that is. Luckily the snow was fairly light, not the nasty wet stuff we sometimes get that can break your back in short order. We did the driveway and the front walk in about an hour and a half. The worst part is always the end where the plows go by. That stuff is just packed and heavy and you have to break it to shovel it.

After we finished up with that we hauled buckets of water out for the animals. Apparently they had hunkered down and hadn't gone out to drink because they were all sucking the water down with relish. I had broken ice off the buckets last night but it had frozen again by morning.

Needless to say I've had more than my fair share of excercise for the day

gonna be sore later....kitten xxx

Nothing thrills the hearts of children everywhere when they hear the words "snow day". Just about every child in my state is doing a happy dance today. And just about every adult is groaning as they get out their shovels, snowblowers and plows. I'm trying to stay on the child's side but the storm is not even half over.

This blog needs no word

I really liked this...it reminds me of something someone told me...

From the Talmud, a collection of Jewish writings in the 1st and 2nd century:

Be very careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. The woman came out of a man’s rib. Not from his feet, to be walked on. Not from his head, to be superior. But from the side, to be equal. Under the arm, to be protected, and next to the heart, to be loved.

kitten aka riblet

Ok, today I'm putting the lights on the tree. It's had a couple of days to settle and so far is still standing albeit with a very slight tilt.
I've got the long sleeve shirt on...gloves...a beer...my hair is up...
Wish me luck!